Posts by Aetyr

Parcelforce website cold-shoulders Linux lovers

@ AC 10:50am

"Why don't you FreeTARDS get yourselves more than 1% of the operating system market and maybe you will get more than 1% of the development monies spent in the system dedicated to supporting you!"

No idea why you're talking about 1% when Parcelforce themselves already admitted it's 10% they're not accommodating, which is not a percentage any good business would want to systematically exclude.

"Oh wait because you guys want eveything to be free you guys aren't even the high volume big spenders customers worthy of dedicated funding support!"

It doesn't work on iPhones either and, as mentioned above, has issues on Macs at crucial points (despite Macs being part of the 90% that Parcelforce thinks it DOES support). People who can afford these two devices are often known to fit into the "big spenders" category, so Parcelforce could actually benefit financially from a bit more funding in the cross-platform support area.

As is usual for all factless comments from angry trolls, you fail. Hard. Twice.

'Kidnapped' child tracked by mobile phone and Street View

@ A J Stiles

Even if, morally speaking, you believe that family members should be allowed to see each other whenever both of them want to - not something I'd disagree with myself to be honest, I think family is one of the most important things we have - no one, anywhere, ever, can kidnap another human being and claim that's OK just because they're family.

Dare I mention a high-profile recent UK case of a now-infamous mother kidnapping her own daughter? That was the same thing, and no one anywhere thinks that was acceptable, do they?

I've only shagged two blokes, insists Paris Hilton

Misinterpreted...

When she said "I've only shagged two blokes" she clearly meant for the ending "...at a time" to be applied. Presumably she got distracted before she could finish the sentence because she caught sight of something that looked slightly phallic.

I'm putting a thumb up, because I reckon that's something Paris has let a lot of blokes do.

Pranksters infiltrate live Macworld feed

Sense of humour transplants available here!

Glad to see the taciturn faces of a few people taking it too seriously. Of course it was funny. It only wouldn't be funny if Mr Jobs had taken it seriously himself and cried himself to sleep afterwards, and I seriously doubt he did that.

After all, if Steve Jobs got upset everytime some nameless anonytard on the internet said something bad about him, he'd have worried himself sick years ago!

Oh wait... :P

EA punts SecuROM-less games on Steam

I approve!

Of the great little Christmas poem, that is. Top stuff! Please keep it up.

As for EA and their supposed attempt to redeem themselves, I'm interested to see if it turns out to be just another evil scheme from their secret ruler, Lucifer Himself, to lure in innocent gamers.

If they have in fact changed their tune and finally appreciate that the paying customer is not a villainous thief until proven otherwise multiple times over, then this is indeed the start of something awesome. :D

Paris, because she can be installed on any hard drive time and time again...

Mac fans see MS porn everywhere

@ Jim

"Where are the cries for banning the Internet?"

The government's already got that covered. They've sent a highly trained squad of soldiers to find the server that runs the Internet and shut it down using the large "Off" switch that their sources have assured them will take the whole WWW offline.

Why, any moment now we can expect to lose connectio-

Boffins keep transplant lungs alive in glass dome

Doing Science for the people who are still alive

That was weird yet interesting, being able to watch a pair of lungs breath outside of a body.

Really inspiring what those Science types can do these days - how long until we're actually living forever and turning lead into gold?

"There is research to be done on the people who aren't still alive."

BBC: Top Gear Tesla didn't run out of juice

BBC also receives complaint over latest episode of "Merlin"...

...for implying that things were done using magic without explicitly stating within the episode that it was just special effects and actors faking it.

Anyone who can afford the cars that Top Gear shows would never rely on a Top Gear "review" for their purchasing decisions. Top Gear know this. Top Gear viewers know this. People who have never watched Top Gear in their life but have read about this in the news, on the other hand...

By the way, since I haven't explicitly stated it: my opening statement about Merlin was not true. I made it up in the name of humour and to make a point. Apparently a lot of people commenting on this story don't "get" that kind of statement though, so I'd "deserve to be sued" if I didn't clarify that. x'D

Story withdrawn

Might I add...

Where's "* over 9000!!"?

I think if you put that one on the list it would get... *fights to restrain self* "a large number of" votes.

Mine's the one with a Scouter in the pocket!

Daft list names Firefox, Adobe and VMWare as top threats

Oh dear...

Symantec and Trend are threats to our security? Well that kind of defeats the point, doesn't it? ;)

My office has Trend on all its PCs... I'd better go round uninstalling it from every machine, pronto! And I'll get rid of that Firefox too, if it's such a security risk. If these guys think I'm safer with IE just because I can update it centrally, they must know what they're talking about!

I love a good giggle on a Friday afternoon :D

Paris, because she should always appear on a list of things that could cause your end-point to become infected...

Doctor Who heads iPlayer hit list

@David Webb

"Where are the Olympics?"

Although the olympics were so heavily watched at the time, they weren't on for very long at all.

Presumably the much longer availability window of all these other shows has allowed them to roll slowly up to much higher numbers of viewings than the olympics (there's practically always some kind of Dr Who, Top Gear, Little Britain and Mock the Week on the iPlayer somewhere, all year round).

Oz men's mag recovers inflatable jubs

Buoyancy...

"Initial reports suggested they'd gone missing from their shipping container and were presumably drifting the world's oceans in a vast mammary shoal."

That'd be a sight to see if you were out on a boat and a bunch of those "buoyancy aids" floated on past you.

Hell, if it were me I might just go overboard "accidentally" and have no choice but to grab a few "for my own safety".

Apple more closed than Microsoft

@Kevin O'Donnell

"The difference here is that Apple's package is so good and so reliable. [...] I would also point out that you can run Windows on a Mac, but NOT vice versa. Is that monopolistic practice?"

Yes, it is a monopolistic practise. However you seem to be arguing FOR Apple using that fact.

Do your research, and next time you might not destroy your own argument: The only reason that Mac can't be run on non-Mac hardware (and also not as a VM) is because Apple refuse to let you do it, and will sue the crap out of anyone who tries to make it work. Not because it makes their software better, but to protect their profit margins.

Don't get me wrong, I know MS are equally ££-minded in their own ways, and in both OSes it means their release schedules and product content have stopped being about quality and security, and more about quick, easy money printing.

As such, Apple v MS arguments will never truly get resolved. Like a Newton's Cradle, they will keep bouncing back and forth with equal and opposite force, ad infinitum...

Dare I wish for a third alternative where money wasn't an issue and security, openness and quality were the top priority? ;)

Yahoo! shares tumble as Ballmer shuts coffin on Microhoo

@ steven kraft

"Somebody please fire Jerry Yang before he completely devalues Yahoo!'s shares!"

You mean you want them to go back into the past and fire him then?

Paris, because only she can go down faster than Yahoo's stocks...

MP calls for Jezza Clarkson's head

They should be asking him to do it again...

It's a scientifically proven fact that Jeremy Clarkson is so sarcastic that nothing he says is ever believed as truth. In fact, the opposite is often true. Therefore, by saying all truckers kill hookers, Clarkson is in fact convincing most Top Gear viewers that truckers do not kill hookers.

Does anyone else remember his little safety video about level crossings? He managed to boil it down to "If you don't want a train to crash into your car, wear a reflective jacket", but knowing the average Top Gear watcher (myself included), they probably respected and got the real message from that video a hundred times more than the serious, patronising and boring safety campaigns you normally get. If the BBC fire him (as if!), it'll be a mistake.

Can anyone find out if the MP in question reads the Daily Wail?

BlackBerry Storm to blow in next week - minus Wi-Fi

Give us a break.

Wifi speeds far outdo any of the other types of transfer on smartphones these days. It will be far in the future when anyone can be believed when they say "the mobile networks are sufficiently fast that wifi is not needed".

I'd have a damn sight more respect for them if they just openly said "we care more about profit margins than your ease of use and connectivity". We all know it's true for all the operators, why do they still bother lying and alienating people even more?

Jezza Clarkson cops flak for 'truckers murder strumpets' gag

Tasteless joke alert!

"a charity which had helped some of the murdered prostitutes in Ipswich"

Might I tread on risky ground and ask someone to reconsider that wording?

I mean, surely they meant "the family of the murdered prostitutes"? I don't really think there's much you can do to help a murdered prostitute, unless you happen to have the page from Jesus' Book of Magic Tricks which explains how he managed to come back from the dead...

Yahoo! prepares to slash jobs this week

Re: Again!

I'm glad they don't do the "Exclaim! After! Every! Word!" thing any more. It was funny a few times, but after that it just got annoying for those of us who do actually read things as the punctuation dictates, even when reading in our heads.

I mean, do you know how much longer it takes to read a headline when your mind keeps pausing after each exclamation mark?

On topic though, it makes you wonder if they'd actually have been much better off under MS? Sure, they might have looked a bit more stable and the stockholders might have a few more dollars, but the layoffs of the actual staff who do the work would still have happened as departments merged and Google would still be Grand Emperor of the Intarwebs.

Euro mobe companies mass against cap proposals

Surprise, surprise

The mobile phone companies don't want people to be able to choose to leave their network for cheaper. Quelle surprise!

Anyone else remember last year when the banks came under threat for their unreasonable (and legally questionable) bank charges. They also spouted some crap about our banking being cheaper than other countries', and how if they were forced to stop charging unreasonable prices for overdrafts, they'd be 'forced' to start charging for other things instead.

Pure FUD to scare Joe Public away from joining the revolution.

Considering that you usually leave a phone company because you're unhappy with their service, you shouldn't have to award them a special payout for the privilege. "Here Vodafone, you've screwed me over too many times. Have a lump sum of money as punishment!"

Ridiculous.

Mozilla slots pr0n safe mode into Firefox 3.1

If only...

...these private modes could also stop naughty sites leaving viruses and malware on your PC. I can has "sandbox" mode plz?

Royal Society: Schools should show creationism 'respect'

Works better than just slamming it

"teachers need to be able to explain to them why evolution and the Big Bang are scientific theories but they should also take the time to explain how science works and why creationism has no scientific basis."

Too right. If you just go around saying "Creationism is wrong" and rebutting any queries about why with "Because it's stupid and I said so" then that's a perfect way to make a child more interested in it through curiosity. If you take the time to sit them down and show them why Creationism is a bunch of unfounded anti-science made up by religious nuts in a poorly-planned attempt at keeping religion 'realistic' in a modern, intelligent society, then they are far more likely to listen and learn the difference between fabrication and years of scientific evidence.

"Because I said so" never teaches anyone anything, and in more cases than not just makes people of any age even more curious about the subject.

Lenovo drops web sales of Linux machines

On the flip side...

...it could just be that, with a number of makers of small laptops choosing to include their own flavour of Linux, those people who do want Linux preinstalled just don't want Lenovo, and decided to go for an Asus, Acer or HP instead.

It could be Linux, but it could also be Lenovo...

German court bans VoiP on iPhone

Can't make calls on a phone?

What is the world coming to?

What did CRT monitor makers do when they saw people switching to superior TFT and LCD screens? They joined the revolution and started making flatscreens themselves.

Phone operators can't stop VOIP, they can barely even slow it down. Unless they start doing something like Skype does, offer free VOIP calls and cheaper calls over VOIP to real phone numbers, then they'll just end up losing.

I don't mind, it'll be fun to watch them fumble desperately to stop the advance of internet technology and people's determination to fully utilise it.

Mine's the one that lets me put anything I want in the pocket...

Employee has no privacy on company computers, US court rules

You'd be surprised...

...how many actual people, even over here in the UK, think "do not install unauthorised third-party software on your work computer/laptop" means "well, OK, if you want to install Skype to talk to your mate in Australia or you need to have iTunes and 30GB of music then you can ignore the rules of the people who actually own that machine".

It's hard to convince people who use work-provided (and therefore -owned and -regulated) computers that they can't just go installing whatever they want, letting their kids download and play all sorts of free net games. Of course, they suddenly remember that the equipment belongs to the company when it comes to expensive repairs (often because there's jam under the keyboard or something).

Oh yeah, and then they get up in arms when you take away their admin rights so they can't use the machine as their own personal toy.

Apple's MobileMe plays into hands of spammers

Not again...

Earlier in the year el Reg was reporting on Apple's security folks deciding against patching a security hole in Safari because they didn't really think it mattered. On top of that Paypal blocked Apple's browser, IIRC, for being too insecure, and now MobileMe is sticking a big note on its users' backs saying "Spam me!". Not to mention the bundling of MobileMe into all new iTunes installs whether you use it or not, and attempting to get Safari downloaded onto people's PCs earlier in the year too - it all reeks of bloat and force-feeding people their different solutions and disregard for consumer choice.

They certainly make a shiny, easy-to-use OS on such limited amounts of hardware that it never has to worry about drivers or incompatibility, and I was practically convinced that I was going to buy one last year. Now, however, I'm starting to think Apple need to step back and rethink what they see their customers as, because if the answer is "numbers on our bank balance" then they're just going to get closer and closer to being the people they currently oppose.

I can only hope that's not the answer, and this year's problems are 'bumps in the road' as Apple get used to being popular and realise it isn't all about people worshipping you and feeding you money. We'll see, I guess...

With great power comes great responsibility! And a cool costume... But Jobs doesn't have one of those yet... His ego's already inflated enough as is, right? :D

UK.gov loses 29 million personal records

Of course they lost it...

...this is the same government who, IIRC, released some kind of statement or had a spokesperson announce, after Hazel Blears' home computer got stolen, saying that all the confidential government data that was on the machine (and never should have been to start with, by the way) was perfectly safe, because Windows had a password on it.

Yes, the current government believes that it is impossible to crack a Windows password, despite there being hundreds of freely downloadable tools on the intarwebnets which will do just that.

If they are ignorant of that fact, which I would call pretty basic IT security knowledge, then how can they be expected to keep data safe?

Paris, because she's well aware of exactly how exploitable all of her security holes are.

Apple tops customer satisfaction poll as rivals' ratings slide

Hardware survey?

Where do comments about OS v OS come into this hardware based article?

Yeah, Apple are way better than Dell in that area. HP are also way better than Dell though, so not sure what happened there...

I agree with the person who pointed out that HP and Compaq are one and the same now... Surely, even if the end users on the phone were talking about them in two different names, the results should have been merged? Correct me if they still run separately enough to be considered thus, but I'm sure all the Compaq gear I've seen lately is clearly marked "HP Compaq".

Microsoft? Linux? well they don't even make PCs so they can bugger off out of this conversation! :D

Paris, because even she knows the difference between hard and soft.

Teachers give toilet CCTV top marks

@ Andy Turner

"If they want to be treated like adults, act like them too."

Thanks Andy, you made me chuckle on an otherwise stressful day.

They are not adults, and the issue is not to treat them like adults. The issue is to treat them like humans. Which they are, whether they're unruly due to bad parenting skills, or perfectly well behaved little automotons, or some more healthy option somewhere in between.

If teachers want CCTV in schools to protect the school and its pupils and staff, then the classroom is just as important a place for them to be protected. And of course, if the teachers are being as well-behaved and 'adult' as you suggest, then they should have nothing to worry about, right?

Don't get me wrong, I hate the whole idea - we're already headed for 1984 in this country waaaaay too fast for my liking, but if teachers really want CCTV in schools, they can't expect to be immune to it themselves.

I think we'd have a much more fair and truly 'civilised' society if anyone who wanted to set up some form of surveillance or monitoring on the general public had to agree to be monitored by the same system and to the exact same extent themselves. Then there'd be a real reason to make sure these things only came into place when they really needed to, and for the right reasons.

The PSP: what's its future?

Not a great standalone games console...

...but I love my PSP completely for what it can do by proxy.

Not only can I use it to pop into my PS3 over the intarweb to start up new PS Store downloads, check messages and watch whatever videos I have stored on the 60GB hard drive, but I can even play Lair on it if the disc is in the PS3, and come November I'll be able to control PlayTV over it to watch live/prerecorded TV and set my PS3 to record that episode of Heroes I forgot about when I left the house.

All sounds wonderful, right? Except you can only do that if you happen to own a PS3, and are in one of those places that provides a wireless hotspot that your PSP can actually connect to. Plus none of those are really features of a good games console (except the 'playing Lair' part and, at a stretch, telling my PS3 to download some new games or demos). It seems Sony are suffering a similar fate on both their current consoles: great pieces of kit, with all sorts of nifty functions, but with major problems building up enough of a games catalogue to make it worth the purchase.

Not to mention the fact that despite being on firmware version 4, the damn thing has very few defining new functions compared to earlier versions - why oh why can't you use the PSP to directly log on to your PSN username and check your messages/manage your friends list/download PSP demos from the PS Store, like you can on the PS3?

All of that is what they need to work on before they bother redesigning the hardware with even more nifty features but still the same old lack of games to support them and increasingly stale firmware.

Microsoft pledges to fight Vista 'myths'

@Sput

Well said sir! That's the real argument MS are trying to stop people from seeing.

Ubuntu is a real step in the right direction for getting real users onto Linux, and if anyone can sit and watch a very basic user get started with Ubuntu, and see how quickly they can pick it up if they give it a chance, and then still claim Linux will never be a mainstream desktop OS they're just lying to themselves.

I'm not saying it's going to de-throne the big dogs, right all the wrongs of the world or cure all cancers, but it's definitely not doomed to reside in the dark and dusty halls of geekdom for all eternity, if it continues on as it currently is.

I will disagree with you very strongly on one line of your post though, albeit slightly off topic:

"I don’t play games. I’m a grown up"

There are plenty of grown up games out there, and even many which require you to work your grey cells, just as there are equal amounts of childish material on the television and even plenty to be found on the bookshelf. Someone who plays computer games is not necessarily more childish than someone who uses some other form of entertainment to pass their time.

Just like someone who uses Linux is not necesarily a techie or nerd, which you so effectively argued.

Tiwi spies on your children, so you don't have to

When I have kids...

I'm going to introduce my kids to other kids whose parents installed monitors like this in their cars.

That way I'll look better as a parent because I don't treat them like unconvicted criminals waiting to happen.

I'd love to see what happened if they managed to pull off someone's earlier suggestion of putting these on the parents' cars... I bet you'd find at least as many 'offences' or more than in those of newly-qualified drivers.

Firefox 3 downloads hit 7m despite server FAIL

@Rasczak & Kevin Gurney

@ Rasczak: Firefox has had a Refresh All Tabs option for as long as I can recall on the right click menu of any tab - so that's not an Opera-only function.

@ Kevin: While I agree that letting users install their own software willy-nilly is pretty dumb, it doesn't change the original argument that some IT departments will install Firefox on multiple PCs from one downloaded file saved to a pen-drive or network share - even if they're sensible enough to do it themselves instead of giving local admin rights to any users.

Mine's the one that originally has no pockets, but unlike other coats can have as many different sized ones as I choose to add to it later. ;)

Bugs casts shadow over Firefox 3

Full?

I love how people are yapping about FF3 being "full" of bugs. The story mentions two, one of which is an ongoing one from FF2. I would call that pretty far from full. Nice to see people jump on the bandwagon that these 'flaw finders' were hoping to create when they held back knowledge of these bugs until after 8 million people had installed it.

Still, people love their petty rivalries. If it's not Mac v Windows v Linux, it's Opera v Firefox v IE or Playstation v XBox v Wii...

Someday we'll all just use the stuff we prefer and not act like it makes us better than someone who chose differently.

Asus Eee PC 901 to hit Blighty on 1 July

802.11n?

Does anyone know which draft of 802.11n the wireless is? A quick search of the web hasn't really pulled up an answer.

Doesn't make a difference to my purchase; I've been fighting my will power and holding off on buying a 900 just for this piece of kit!

Loving the grammar 'discussion' though... Reminds me of some Blackberrys/Blackberries debates I used to see going around.

As I recall, no word that ends in S, plural or singular, is followed by 's. For example, the name Ross: something belonging to Ross is still Ross', even though there is only one Ross.

Researchers out Apple over unpatched iCal bugs

@ Dan Wilkinson

I can see why you'd get Ballmer and Jobs confused, Apple and MS are like two peas in a pod lately. Delayed security updates and newer versions of software that are actually worse than the previous versions? Where have we heard that before?

If only there were some third option, which wasn't so insecure and made just to make money...

Mine's the Tux (geddit?)

Illinois gal gives Street View an eyeful

If this becomes a new trend...

...then it won't be long before overweight men start doing it too 'for comedy value'. *shudder*

Mine's the one held wide open in front of passing traffic.

Pants purveyor punts handset-holding undies

Someone's got to say it...

...but this would definitely bring new life to the currently dying market for video calls.

Can you hear me now?

Vista on your iPhone - almost 'perfection'

I can see why...

...people would think adding Windows features to an Apple phone was a good thing. Windows Mobile actually lets you install whatever you want on the hardware you own without having to hack it first.