Posts by Tim

Leeds Council loses kids details

Mmmm

"The council could not explain how, or why, the information was put on the memory stick in the first place."

Why not just ask the person who reported it as lost? Maybe they were selling it to the local peadophiles.

BBC relives The Day of The Triffids

New Ideas

Hey

I know BBC, you can't think of anything new programs just remake a load of old ones. Whats next? Quatermass, Doomwatch, Blakes 7, Star Cops or Moonbase 3?

Give your writers a real chance to make something original up.

Beeb to cut the f**king swearing

Swear words

Why do swear words have to be justified? You hear them all the time late at night and in the pub. Surely a warning would suffice saying that the following program may contain swearing the same as violent and sexual scenes are warned about before films.

Dixons plunges to loss

"cutting £30m from capital expenditure"

Which means they are going to sack staff until the total wages saved equals £30million.

FBI warns NY officials of Thanksgiving Day terrorist plot

Other threats

There could be other possible threats. I could fart through the mayor of New Yorks Letterbox, It's not something I'm planning to do but it's something I could do. Maybe. Probably not.

Fire, cos I could light it as well.

Zoo's polar bear breeding plan scuppered by girl-on-girl

MMMM

Girl on girl bear(bare) action anyone?

Yes! It's the USB Toaster!

Toasting laptops?

Just buy a Laptop with a certain make of battery in it and there you go, put the bread between the screen and keyboard and violá, toast. It's only a one time use though and you will need a fire extinguisher to hand to put the laptop out.

Blizzard awarded $6m in WoW bot case

Other Bots?

I want to know why they only have gone after Gilder, a quick google search brings up loads of bot programs. They are based in America so that's why, I think.

I have been looking at glider and what it does is use a driver that makes wow think keys are being pressed. It does not alter game code at all, it does is break the Terms and Conditions of the account however.

People probably named Glider because it was the only bot name they know, it's like Hoover and Vacuuming.

Tiny MyCar named electric vehicle of the year

Power?

Where does the power come from? Nuclear? Fossil fuels? Very Green.

Right: Which one of you lot invented 'tw*tdangle', eh?

His IP address

I know who it was and his IP address is 127.0.0.1

Hee Hee.

US Army unit deployed to home front

Troops on the streets?

Maybe if the uk street were treated the same as Iraq streets there would be less trouble. Throwing stones at the fire service, send the army along to shoot the bastards. Joy riding, RPG the bastards. You get the idea.

UK.gov 'to drop' überdatabase from snoop Bill

Vote?

Well when I vote on this, oh dear, I forgot we live in an elected dictatorship I don't get to vote on anything except which government gets in and no matter who you vote for, the government always gets in. If this was another country the americans would come in and take over...... oh dear again.

PM Brown dusts off one interweb per child plan (again)

New

At least I will be able to got to cash converters and buy a brand new cheap computer.

MI6 agent's moustache falls off during TV interview

British

I must say that it's typical of british workmanship maybe he should have drawn one on like Groucho Marx.

Now Hollywood is chasing UK downloaders

You steal, you get arrested...

...probably.

What you don't seem to realise that it is illegal to get hold of copyrighted material without the express permission of the copyright holder.

If you see downloading as not doing anything wrong, you are wrong, you may choose to ignore this fact but its correct. It's like going into a shop and stealing the DVDs off the shelves or petrol from a garage. An old argument I know, but it is still true.

Btw I used to work for Tiscali when the calls were taken in the UK and it's true, they couldn't organise a piss up in a brewery.

E-voting outfit confesses vote-dropping software bug

Recount?

Doesn't the bug (deliberate or otherwise) make the results of the election invalid?

Nuns face off in online beauty contest

A real beauty contest?

I'm just waiting for the Catholic Press Swimsuit Edition....

UK spooks forced to hand Gitmo files to suspect's lawyers

Secret documents.

Surely if you want secret documents all you need to do is look on any underground train for a laptop?

Judge refuses to lift order squelching students' subway card hack

Alternative

Maybe instead of gagging the Students they should Fix the system so it can't be done anymore.

Judge spikes 'dumbest literary agent' Wikipedia suit

Are the books bad?

I have never read one of her books so are they really that bad?

Three-alarm fire bakes Apple facility

For Sale

Fire damaged goods now for sale cheap. Maybe they were making a battery that lasts longer in the new iPhone and it blew up?

AOL phisher jailed for 7 years

Anyone can do it.

The reason is aol customers are so computer illiterate you could ask them just about anything and they would probably do it. Imagine, send us your computer and we'll update the aol software on it for only £30.

Paris 'cos she shares her IQ score with an average aol customer.

Suprise at spelling snafu sanctions

Spelling mistakes.

Maybe the website they are copying and pasting from has the mistakes and they do not read it?

Bill Gates exposed as closet Yorkshireman

A Yorkshireman?

The only way to be a Yorkshireman is to be born in one of the three Ridings of Yorkshire. So he is not a Yorkshireman. He is desended from a Yorkshireman.

NASA: Mars is good habitat for Terry Pratchett dragons

Feet?

He could always throw it with his feet. After all mine can kill at 20 yards.

Blu-ray to rule by 2011

Price?

DVD player £25

Blu-Ray £200

Disc prices are usually at least 60% more as well.

You do the math.

Dr. Strangevote saves mankind with Luddite voting recipe

Democracy?

In the UK we have an elected Dictatorship. Every 4 years we vote in another dictator. I'm just trying to remember the last time I voted on something other than a Candidate and guess what? I never have.

MPs report back from internet's dark side

The UK is a Circus and the Clowns are in charge.

"...the public needs the assurance that certain basic standards will be met"

But who defines the standards. Can I have the job please?

I think it's a good idea to display a link to report a video and show the terms and conditions more forcefully. It's not the children I'm worried about but the people who copy what they see. How many vids are on there of people doing the stuff the jackass TV show do?

New York threatens Comcast with anti-porn suit

American government, Porn Profiteers.

What many of you don't understand is that the American Government earn loads of cash taxing the porn bought in american shops. So therefore they are profiting from the Porn sales in the US of A. How two faced is that?

Holidaymaker gets £31k data roaming bill

Buy the DVD?

He could of bought the whole series and loads of CDs for £229, and CDs and DVDs cheaper in europe too.

NZ sports fans cop eyeful of hardcore

3 mins 50 seconds?

Doesn't someone actually monitor the outgoing feed? I'm sure I'd notice if one of the monitors had porn on it.

Who will be the next Doctor?

The new doctor is .....

.... Ricky Gervais. Nuff Said! Probably, possibly, maybe not.

Photos fool cigarette age-verification software

Another Idea.

Why don't they move the machines to a place only 20+ people can go into, or even remove the machines altogether, that will stop the under age people buying them.

King Arthur was English 'propaganda', French claim

Another famous Myth

What it rerally comes down to is belief. Do you believe King Arthur existed? I can think of another myth that is even older that Billions believe in of which there is no real proof, only a single book.

The war on photographers - you're all al Qaeda suspects now

Suprising

I read this and was really surprised, not by the fact the police stole the mans film but there were police officers in Hull City Centre. I work in the City Centre and only ever see the pretend police, who as far as I can tell have no real powers.

Phorm failed to mention 'illegal' trials at Home Office meeting in 2007

Comment

If you ask me the home office said if we can have a copy of the source data we won't do anything to you.

MS whips lens cap off WorldWide Telescope

Space software

If you want to look at space try Stellarium. at least you can see the stars and galaxies and it's free.