Posts by cookieMonster

Google veep calls out Microsoft's cloud software licensing 'tax'

Re: Microsoft being Microsoft

Edge?

I’ve heard I about that.

Windows driver woes trip AMD GPU owners, blind Arm-powered cameras

Ah Microsoft

Is there anything they won’t fuck up??

IR35 costs UK Research and Innovation £36M – the same it spent funding tech projects

Unicorn Kingom??

LMFAO !!!!!

Microsoft would rather spend money on AI than give workers a raise

Re: "We don't care if some of you quit over not getting a raise"

Could you imagine how much better windows would be if all the cheap, unskilled, inexperienced and shit developers they employ, were replaced with BobAI/ClippyCoder/ChatGPT??

Nobody would even notice!!

Nearly 1 in 5 academics admit close encounters of the anomalous kind

Re: Sigh

I hear Samsung’s are great at taking shots of the sky, especially things as far away as the moon

Don't panic. Google offering scary .zip and .mov domains is not the end of the world

“ ….they're already working on a fix for Edge….”

I admire your optimism!!

Samsung's Galaxy S23 Ultra is a worthy heir to the Note

Re: What's the result

An indecent exposure charge?

Is there anything tape can’t fix? This techie used it to defeat the Sun

You evil little shit…. I love it!!!

VA's Cerner EHR platform fails to deliver medications to veterans

As always …. Never enough time to do it right, but loads of time to fix it after.

Alien rock causes cosmic disturbance in New Jersey home

Re: It Came out of the Sky

OMG !!! There’s children on this forum??

Brexit Britain looks to French company to save crumbling borders and immigration tech

Re: CapGemini built Abbey Nationals car and home insurance software

They fu€&@ed up a multi year project so bad in France in the late 90’s that it resulted in me moving from California to France, “for a week or two”, to work out how to fix it. Many years later I was still there, decided to stay!

Best result from an outsourcing engagement in my entire life.

Pixies keep switching off my morning alarm, says Google Pixel owner

Sounds like your wife’s alarm is working exactly as required.

Now go put the tea on like a dear.

A right Royal pain in the Dallas: City IT systems crippled by ransomware

Re: One Network...

“ Why is there any common connection at all between these?”

A quick guess…. Different tabs in the same excel spreadsheet??

Four out of five Uranus moons likely to have ocean under crust

Is that the one with the brown rings??

Re: This is so cool (no pun)

Stargate?

How Sandia hopes to accelerate US hypersonic weapons development

Bullshit

“ [That's] a time scale that was very hard to meet," Nance said.”

The SR-71 was done in less that that

You need more engineers, less marketing, PR, manglement, diversity managers and an empowered leader with a spine.

No more feature updates for Windows 10 – current version is final

Re: It's the hardware, innit ....

You left out “…with every patch”

I more or less use all the apps you’ve listed, on an X220 running Mint. No problems whatsoever.

Very well played

NASA tweaks Voyager 2's power supply to avoid another sensor shutdown

Re: I bet some smartass...

nope, it will be iFortran

or, god forbid FortranAI

Microsoft is busy rewriting core Windows code in memory-safe Rust

Re: "I expect Microsoft to reuse the existing compiler"

And activeX and COM, oh oh and Flash……

US watchdog grounds SpaceX Starship after that explosion

Like “move fast and break things” ?

Microsoft tackles SaaSy URL sprawl, dumping its dotcom in favor of cloud.microsoft

Re: What is a "cross-app experience"?

Any of their current offerings.

Tell me you haven’t been “cross” with any of them!!

UK becomes Unicorn Kingdom, where AI fairy dust earns King's ransom

Re: Unicorns...

Are you implying she has a strap-on??

Re: "...to make up for the inflation which has ravaged their pay packet, according to unions..."

“… comparing either to the UK's lockdown….”

That’s where everyone went to parties in other peoples houses, instead of to the pub??

That's cute. UK.gov gathers up £100M for AI super-models

Re: Eminently qualified

What about our old favourite, “Dildo* Harding”

* never sure of the correct spelling

American private equity can't wait to gobble up Euro stalwart Software AG

Sounds like the

Beginning of the end to me.

Anytime an American “group” buys anything, it’s about making money, fast. Fuck everything and anyone, history, values, customs etc. etc.

These people only care about making a quick profit.

My advice to anyone working for that company is simple, get out now.

If you don't get open source's trademark culture, expect bad language

My wife calls the hoover “dear”. Dear, did you remember to do the stairs?

Chinese scientists calculate the Milky Way's mass as 805 billion times that of our Sun

Hmmmmm

“Which is quite a lot and would ruin your appetite if you ate a whole one.”

Yeah, but the fun size ones are too small

Boffins think they've decoded mysterious 819-day Mayan calendar

we again note that we're still here

Thanks for that, was getting a bit worried there for a minute.

Musicians threaten to make Oasis 'Live Forever' with AI

Re: Perfect harmony

Donald Trump/Sid Vicious - My Way??

CEO sorry after telling staff to 'leave pity city' over bonuses

Re: Remember folks.

Upvote upvote upvote

Can’t click the icon more

Google backs Bard to generate ads, which apparently improves creativity

Re: Please, just make it stop

There’s a reason I stuck around this site for so long.

And it’s because of perls of genius like this.

Have a pint, it’s early but it’s the weekend and the start of the holidays where I’m at.

Meh

“ advertiser's existing assets, ads, or landing pages, eliminating the possibility of digital hallucinations that might spread "inaccurate information."

So, how’s it going to deal with “anti-gravity” cream? The shit that’s targeted at women over the age of 15??

ChatGPT creates mostly insecure code, but won't tell you unless you ask

10 print “Heollo@; goto 10;

“ We found that, in several cases, the code generated by ChatGPT fell well below minimal security standards applicable in most contexts”

What the f$¥%# does anyone expect from something that is NOT intelligent, in any way whatsoever. Scraping the internet for code examples LOL

Pentagon shoots down UFO rumors but says 650 cases are still pending

Hmmm

“ AARO was launched last year with the goal of working together with different defense and intelligence agencies to detect and identify objects operating in US airspace near sensitive areas, like government or military bases, that could threaten national security.”

So, balloon spotters then??

Google Brain, protein-folding DeepMind fold into one

Yeah, right

"Together, in close collaboration with our fantastic colleagues across the Google Product Areas, we have a real opportunity to deliver AI research and products that dramatically improve the lives of billions of people, transform industries, advance science, and serve diverse communities.“

Pass the sick bag

Ubuntu 23.04 Lunar Lobster scuttles into public view

Re: "Pause" updates?

“ So I now have half a dozen Pis in a drawer, and one on my garage wall that's not going to get updated.”

Sounds like a good thing, considering the alternative

Google Fi still kicking, gets third rebrand in less than a decade

Hover-over?

“…..Google said, adding in a hover-over footnote that the plan would begin automatically billing after the end of the trial”

Does that even work on mobile devices ????

I think they are nothing but a bunch of < Insert profanity of choice here >

Medusa ransomware crew brags about spreading Bing, Cortana source code

So, what’s the weather then?

Blizzard, Sleet, Typhoon or Sandstorm??

How does Atlassian hope to actually improve Confluence and Jira? AI, of course!

Confluence

One of the worst products I ever used in 30+ years of computer use.

An absolute shit show of a product

Automation is great. Until it breaks and nobody gets paid

Re: "execute his target script 16384 times"

auto-appending to the cron job = a terrible accident in a stairwell || a fall out a faulty window, very high up a building

San Francisco fog defeats pack of Waymo robo-taxis

Re: Confusion

Re “ There is probably a proper term for it”

Gobshite comes to mind

April Patch Tuesday: Ransomware gangs already exploiting this Windows bug

And missing desktop icons

Tupperware looking less airtight than you'd think

The originals were great

We’ve some 20+ years old original units and they are nearly as good as the day we got them, newer stuff is cheap, low quality Chinese shit.

They deserve to go down the toilet, they forgot WHAT they were supposed to be making/selling.

Thieves smash hole in wall to nab $500K in Apple iKit

Re: Where were the plastic police?

Cutting a hole in a wall????

US defense tech veterans call for a separate Cyber Force

Re: Space Force Spacecraft

Well , there’s the star gate for starters, if you count that as a craft.

Microsoft tells admins to autoreview your Autopatch alerts or autolose the service

Re: Automatic fail

Upvoted, I’ve done some crazy shit during the half century or more I’ve been on this planet, but never had the balls to apply a Microsoft patch on the same day it was made available.

Re: AutoPatch: something like ...

The “test group”, you mean marketing, don’t you?