Posts by Ash

Scientists create Chewbotca robot muncher

Machine Mastication

Wasn't the demise of The Terminator at the hands of a Robot-Chewing Device?

The leather one with "I'll Be Back" please.

Windows XP SP3 leaps into the tubes

Terminal Service Client in SP3

The new TS client in SP3 doesn't support the /console switch. If you're going to use this function, don't upgrade. Just a heads-up...

86 installations?!

Do I have to install it 86 times? Or is it limited to 86 uses?

Bugger that, i'll get a Mac.

xpsp3_5512.080413-2113_usa_x86fre_spcd.iso

Air France pilot in white-knuckle near miss

It wasn't a child...

It was a dwarf under-cover agent for the Taliban checking if the security procedures can be overridden by a smile and a hissy-fit.

Apparently, this is the case.

Shit.

How to destroy 60 hard drives an hour

Throw it in the Thames

Just putting that out there...

@All the folks saying "DBAN, Guttman, DOD Standard" etc

This device is aimed at people who are SERIOUSLY paranoid about data being recovered. I don't mean medical and financial records, I mean solid evidence of trading with an enemy during war, Government involvement in illegal espionage, logistics trails and drop zones in an active war theatre etc. DBAN is great for internal redistribution of assets, or the odd Vista uninstall at home, but it's not good enough for these people. These people want to see a hard drive which is so completely unusable that they can start sleeping at night again.

$11.5k for a bench drill IS a lot of money, but a free CD image, or a magnetic wand, aren't enough reasurrance for the kind of industry this tool is aimed at.

Thermite is excessive and i'd class it as Emergency only (as in grenade-in-the-case when the base is under attack kind of emergency). It's not often that you have a reinforced floor on which you can safely carry out a thermite reaction; this may well be the next best thing.

@AC (Degausser)

A tape wipe won't work; the hard drive is in the equivalent of a miniature Faraday cage. HDD Degaussers are FAR more robust (do not operate with fillings kind of thing).

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned driving a few nails through the top of the case with a pneumatic gun.

Hyundai and Kia's latest pitch to US drivers - Windows

Dear Ford and Kia,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KyLqUf4cdwc

Regards,

World.

Cybercrims dump swag on open botnet server

Amateurs!

I believe the real way to leak confidential info is to mail it 2nd Class, leave it on the back seat of a car in a dodgy neighbourhood, or dump it on a roundabout in a middle-class suburb.

These crims have so much to learn...

Grand Theft Auto 4 maker sues Chicago transport chiefs

Bad taste?

Kind of like advertising matches in a burns ward.

Only they're not real matches, just pictures of one on a screen which you control using the WSAD keys.

Pathetic.

'Mad Scientist' developing powered suits for US military

Not impressed

Until I see Patlabour-style mecha suits, i'm checking this one off as a cash soak for prestige, and not a decent developmental platform.

Let's be honest; we need a suit that big to hold a power source large enough to keep it running for more than 14 seconds.

Oz cops sound iPod road cross death warning

Similar...

Walking down the pavement to the local shop, listening to Davidian on full volume (Heavy metal... very loud), turned around to look before crossing the road, and saw a drivable mower following me! God knows how long it had been there, blades wurring.

Ignorant pleb.

Phorm in phormulaic logo phorm storm

Personal opinion...

I wouldn't use that Sheffield company for fear of it being linked with (previously) 121 Media, purely because their branding is so similar. I view the logos to be so similar that it bring an image of a subsidiary company or franchise.

There you have it, proof that they are indeed similar from a customers' perspective. You can now sue them for loss of business, because i'd never, EVER deal with a company I thought REMOTELY linked to Phorm (advertising).

Swiss start-up re-broadcasting UK TV channels

!Free

UK citizens pay £1x0 a year on TV Tax^H^H^HLicensing. Why should foreigners get it free when we end up paying for it?

Google readies for action against Dutch smut site

A new name

Porngoogdash.nl

HP pulls memory Missing Link from bottle of beer

I'd be interedted...

... to see an equation explain humanity's almost total loss of common sense, especially within the voting populace.

School crossing guards join CCTV panlollycon

A better idea...

... Would be to arm them.

Wristwatch packs Wi-Fi sniffer, also tells time

Very interested

WiFi scanning watch + Nokia E51 + Truphone = Cheap / Free calls worldwide.

I'm very interested.

Slashdot website down

Reason for downtime

GTA IV marathon session all last night, and the Bawls supply has run out.

Server Ninja downtime.

MS supplies cops with DIY forensics tool

I have one already

It's called a Linux Live CD.

Lesbians turn on lesbians in battle of Lesbos

This thread...

... means nothing without pictures!

I'm looking at you, Ms Bee.

Grand Theft Auto 4 queue man stabbed in head

Games don't stab people

Maladjusted, sociopathic chavs with little or no sense of consequence stab people.

If they want a manual for murder, tell them to go buy a Human Biology text book.

Radiohead diss freetards

Rank this story...

... down.

At what point did Radiohead in any way speak in a derogatory fashion of their fans? ANY of their fans?

They can choose to distribute their music however they see fit, just as I can choose not to buy it. Them choosing the old model of CD album sales doesn't mean they specifically wish to insult the demographic who downloaded the album.

Non story.

P.S. Ghosts I-IV was a pile of shite. 3 decent tracks, 33 instrumental filler. The only saving grace was I got those 3 tracks in FLAC for $5. Better than a single CD.

Men could have kids with chimpanzees - gov must act

Does this mean...

... Monkey Butlers all round?

:D *SQUEEEEEEEE!*

Brown opts for morality over science on 'lethal skunk'

Unbelievable...

Documented deaths as a direct result of excessive alcohol consumption: 13.4 per 100,000 population (One year, 2006, http://www.statistics.gov.uk/cci/nugget.asp?id=1091 )

Documented deaths as a direct result of excessive smoking: 114,000 (Per year, Average over 50 years, http://old.ash.org.uk/html/factsheets/html/fact02.html )

TOTAL documented deaths as a direct result of excessive cannabis consumption: ONE (All time, World population, http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/health/article999100.ece )

Hypocritical facists.

Amy Winehouse pitches for Bond theme

@Sarah Bee

Best artist of our generation? Which generation is that? I'm 24, i've no doubt there are a significant number of 40 year olds here, and probably some retirees who check in on the odd occasion. I'd say Oasis were more of an influence than Amy Winehouse, or is that too far back?

Either way, I don't like Amy Winehouse. Her voice irritates me. If anyone asks me for a decent current musical artist, I tell them to look up Maynard James Keenan. Tool are possibly one of the most varied, vivid, and thought-provoking bands i've ever listened to. You might also consider The Mars Volta, althought they're pretty obscure and difficult to listen to.

Skype comes to mobile (almost)

Symbian?

Seriously, what's the issue with launching a client for Symbian S60? Truphone have VoIP, Fring have hacked together their own VoIP connection to Skype's network... It's not perfect, but it's proof of contept.

FYI, though, O2, Vodaphone, Orange, and T-Mobile UK all specifically forbid the use of VoIP connections over their mobile data packages. I don't know if they actively take measures to block it, but i'm much more interested in VoIP at WiFi hotspots instead.

Spy regs used against dogs, litterbugs

What?

You have to use RIPA to people-watch in the park now?

What about perving the buxhom blondes with little puppies bending over to stroke their beloved pooch?!

For shame.

Infosecurity is very much like...

Re: XWave

From the site: " This kiosk will take photo of person’s face and print multiple ID stickers at a nominal price. These ID stickers can be used to personalise virtually anything including signatures to deter fraud and medication to deter fatal mistakes. Signatures don’t even expose person’s gender and hence it is virtually impossible to deter identity fraud unless we personalise signatures."

So, you're saying that we can't tell a person's gender from their signature? Very true. However, you're signing over A STICKER WITH THEIR PHOTO AND FULL NAME ON.

Fail.

The best way to secure your identity is to pay with cash. Nobody worries about identity when your ID comes with "I promise to pay the bearer on demand..." printed in colour-fast ink.

Home Office defends 'dangerously misleading' Phorm thumbs-up

User Agent

Set it to:

PHORM: PERMISSION DENIED TO INTERCEPT AND PROFILE.

Sorted.

'Extreme porn' law could criminalise millions

Stupified

Isn't 'Extreme' also covered by "Violent"? Don't we already have a law against that?

They wouldn't dare make les'ing out illegal, would they?

Say it ain't so!

Boris backs weed for pain relief

@Boris for mayor!

So, what were you up to on the 20th of this month?

Hmmm?

Carphone Warehouse cleared out of 8GB iPhones

@Unlocked

Theres no need; the unlocking market is carrying Apple anyway.

Do you honestly think these purchases are for PERSONAL use? Hell no, they're going to flood eBay and undercut the previous sellers.

Colliding galaxies mark Hubble anniversary

Humbled

I am always astounded by pictures like this... A star forming, two galaxies colliding, a picture of a nebula hundreds of light-years across.

Makes me forget about Phorm, work place stress, third world debt, all of that stuff.

5 minutes on Google Space is better than any therapy session.

Canadian man in Taser trouser inferno shocker

A use for...

... tin foil underpants?

Sydney skies menaced by deadly raygun disco-ball

@Sean

There's a third video featuring a collaboration between both parties: http://ie.youtube.com/watch?v=_0719DxMOUY

After 4 long, arduous minutes...

I've found a link to a televised interview from what looks to be a local news agency with the artist behind the work.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU

Paris because... Well, you'll see. The guy's "eccentric" to say the least. Plus, his last name's a little hard to pronounce. I keep wanting to say "Aztee".

Google starts Street View in Europe

Take MY photo?

If I EVER see a van drive down my street with a set of cameras taking pictures, i'm slashing all its tyres and calling the police.

Obviously it's either a:

1) Pedophile, or

2) Terrorist on a reconnaissance mission.

It's what the TV told me.

Dubai mobe cracking demo barred by Heathrow boffin bust

@Mark, Re Encrypted SD Cards

It's a criminal offence in the UK to not hand over encryption keys when requested by court order, penalty of 2 years in prison for most cases, 10 years if involving terrorism or child pornography.

"I can't remember" gets you 2 years.

"There's no hidden volume" gets you 2 years, even if there isn't one.

Come one, come all, into 1984.

FCC tells Comcast to unblock P2P

Sanity?

Or impotent rage?

Will this make a difference?

Paris, because the icon doesn't get used nearly enough for stories with no relevance to her.

Office 2007 fails OXML test

Want to scare Microsoft?

Start emailing all word processed documents in ODF.

Mention in the email body that you wrote the document in OpenOffice (or similar processing package which supports ODF) and they can download it from xyz.com for free, for personal or corporate use, and they can roll it out to every computer, networked or not, share it with anyone they want, totally legally. They can burn the installer to CD and take it home, again totally legally and totally free.

Mention that instead of having Microsoft Office 2007 at approx. £300 a license, they can have a FREE product which does the same thing. (At this point, mention it's totally capable of saving files in Microsoft compatible formats, and reading Microsoft format documents. Compatibility with market leaders is paramount for any company to consider.)

Viola. ODF is the new standard.

NOW GET TO WORK. We have a revolution to continue.

(Tux, because FOSS.)

I wouldn't park there, mate - Honda adds sat nav warnings

Real time parking updates

Sounds great in theory... However, hearing "Proceed 100 yards then turn left. 23 spaces available at last update." to turn up to a "Full" sign, downloading an update, and seeing the distance to destination change from 0M to 2.5M inner London, rush-hour, may just be the most demoralising thing imaginable.

Nintendo Wii 'like a virus', games boss sniffs

FarCry on the Wii

My brother bought it, and all I can say is... Horrible.

Controlls are difficult to use (aiming is easy, but changing weapons / throwing a grenade are frequently confused. If you don't concentrate on what you're doing with both hands at any time, you can cause no end of trouble in the middle of a firefight.

Plus, the graphics are appalling... Looks like the original Tomb Raider on the PlayStation.

I stopped playing afrer 10 minutes (to make sure I wasn't just being retarded).

The American way of bioterror - an A-Z of ricin crackpots

There is only one Weapon of Mass Destruction.

Sensationalist media.

Six months on from HMRC, data losses still rising, says ICO

Surprise surprise!

They're as impotent as the UK general populace.

Ghandi said "We must become the change we want to see in the world." He spread his message through peacful protest.

This is the United States of England. Peacful protest is laughed at by Government and Corporation alike. If we want to see change, we should probably begin with mass refusal to pay various taxes.

The money pool is always the weak spot.

'Virtual strip search' arrives at JFK and LAX

Alternatives?

a) Accept photos being taken by the Pervinator.

b) Refuse and have a pat down.

c) Refuse (and have a sun tan / long beard) and be strip / cavity searched, your suitcase removed from the hold, cut to pieces by Customs, and handed back minus a couple of the more expensive items it contained, have your laptop computer impounded for 6 weeks while they try and figure out why it presents you with a "boot:" prompt instead of showing a Windows xp logo, and spend 2 months at Guantanamo Bay Holiday Resort for Melanin ty.

d) *Don't go to America.*

Microsoft kicks out third Windows XP service pack

What's the point?

My new mobile contract will come with a free PS3 20GB. I may well end up selling my gaming PC on the web / local newspaper, buying a compatible laptop and sticking Ubuntu on it.

I'm fed up with being bent over a barrel after jumping through flaming hoops, following The Microsoft Way. They can shove SP3, Vista, and all their other bloated crapware up their collective asses.

El Reg celebrates 10th birthday

@Ben Parr-Ferris

Reg has always been on about "The Worlds Smallest Island", so more than likely it is indeed the intrepid chap himself!

Thought you could get away with holding the camera all night, eh? You should know better...

Sony Ericsson K660i internet phone

@Jerome

Hi, Reality here. Just called to say that we appreciate your input, but we've found that the sheep will keep buying junk at a high price instead of decent products at a higher price.

Seriously, though, what do you expect from a device which is a bastard offspring of an MP3 Player, Internet Tablet, Telephone, Email platform, games machine, and digital camera? It will never be as good as any of these devices, and the battery life will suffer.

Better to get a couple of devices dedicated to doing a specific task decently than one device doing them all poorly and paying through the nose for it.

Truphone adds £16.5m to global operator hope chest

Good news!

Now all they need to do is stop some phones requiring a hard reset (Battery out) after half an hour of running the app.

Pretty please?