Posts by Ilya

Arab conned into marrying bearded lady

Just wait.

Oh, no worries, mate, it is bound to happen.

All that it takes is a cartoon.

MySQL daddy backs EU's Snoracle probe

Community-shmommunity

O RLY. Larry wasting time on convincing "open-source community" of anything! Besides how awesome his next year offering is going to be, that is.

Oracle and Sun fingered for Sidekick fiasco

A lot of butthurt.

Is Microsoft liable for the damage done to T-Mobile and their customers? No doubt about that.

Was it Snoracle who failed to deliver on their stability promises? Fuck yes!

"More than a year" to migrate enterprise software to a completely different HW+SW platform? Well, for any piece of code more complex than a calculator it's hardly enough for decent reqs and designwork.

Imagine yourself and your company inheriting a clusterfuck of "highly reliable" software/hardware, so well-built by industry's finest talents it can't be touched without causing service downtime. Because there's a good chance this is what'd happened, ladies and gentlemen.

I'm not saying Snoracle stack is a disaster waiting to happen. But it only goes to show that "everybody lies", even if they are extremely open-source and highly anti-Microsoft.

Is Symantec entering the hardware business?

Good news for Chinese military

I wonder how do you bug a multi-terabyte storage appliance?

Feds break Apple's code of App Store silence

That's right!

Of course the government shouldn't tell companies what to do!

Who needs antimonopoly laws when it is absolutely clear the government should only pay bailouts and STFU!

I think that Anonymous Coward is absolutely right. It is a conspiracy and I can smell it in the air.

Clearly, the Obama administration has decided to avenge Jobb's donation to the democratic cause by picking on the saint Apple corporation, which did nothing wrong because all it does is right.

Swearing at work 'good for business'

Compulsory expletives day

Well, what would you know.

The next thing yet another brain-dead executive would impose on his helpless employees might very well be a compulsory expletives day.

Just imagine all the employees gathering in circle and going "fuck!" and "shit!" for at least 5 minutes every hour, to reduce stress and improve working conditions by 3.51 percent or whatever.

Ah, the joy.

Microsoft researcher obsessed with white trash data centers

Here's an idea for a startup

Rent a huge cargo freighter ship (buy a nuclear-powered Russian one if needed), fill it up with them datacenters and send it travelling around the world.

First of all, there's a hosting company in neutral waters and with no jurisdiction for you. A safe haven, so to speak, for all those seeking freedom of speech or royalties for copyrighted material.

Also, as everybody knows that sometimes you can achieve more bandwidth by shipping a load of DVDs rather than by using Internet connections. Just think of a shipful of datacenters in that respect. Multitudes of terabytes of, say, CIA's surveillance data on EU citizens, all transferred into US in a matter of weeks!

I know the idea seems stupid, but hey - some people once raised 1bln dollars for a spaceship-to-the-Moon project, so who knows, maybe the stupid VCs are not all extinct yet.

Autonomy drops ACID test for copyrighted media

A ruse

Mark my words - they have outsourced the "engine" to East Timor or Ruanda, where full sweatshops of kids have to listen to amateur tracks and watch (oh, the pain!) freak home videos from YouTube! in a quest for copyrighted content.

However, until This Ultimate Truth is brought to light by TheReg's finest, let us assume that Lynch's claim is correct and the technology in question runs actual software.

I wonder how usable such a software would be and to whom it will be useful. Imagine a copyright giant such as Viacom trying to unleash this ACID IDOL on the abovementioned YouTube. How large the envisioned database of copyrighted material should be in order to cover all tunes, videos and images in Viacom possession? The complexity of comparing a single video clip with all or most of protected videos in search for several seconds or even a single frame of infringement renders Autonomy's bold claims somewhat untrustworthy.

Unless they're using algorithms as complex as human mind, i.e. real people from Borogravia or Moldovastan. Which happens to prove my conspiracy theory.

Darfur genocide mapped from space

Oh, Iraq is yet to come

The way the wind blows, we have seen nothing yet in Iraq.

American and British troops are yet to withdraw, and THEN the real butchering will start.