* Posts by Craig Roberts

30 publicly visible posts • joined 11 Apr 2007

Gordon 'to sacky' Wacky Jacqui

Craig Roberts


"Harriet Harman."

You evil evil bastard! ;)

Craig Roberts

Not good enough...

... Okay, so it's good that Wacki Jacqui's on the way out... And the two toned idiot who's been pretending to be Chancellor for the past 2 years is going too (hopefully) but it's still not good enough...

Bring on a full General Election NOW! The public deserve the chance to weed out thieving MP bastards and show Gordon Brown that, actually, you're not an elected Prime Minister - so get the fuck out!

It's a sad sad day when I find myself actually missing Tony... Kinda...

Pity the Tories are still the bunch of right wing idiots they've always been - just now with added media savvy from Cameron...

Vote Lib Dem! 'Cos... well... you may as well... How bad can it be? :)

Windows XP Mode: Certify like you mean it

Craig Roberts
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Why no XP Mode for home users?

Microsoft readies IE8 for lift off

Craig Roberts
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Today, our lives as Web Dev's gets that little bit easier... Hopefully it'll be pushed out as a critical update in Windows Update shortly and we can get onto the final straight (read 2 years ish) of having custom CSS files for IE users...

Imagine... Only having to design the page ONCE! :)

Red Dwarf finally returns to Earth

Craig Roberts


Any new Dwarf is good news as far as I'm concerned - even though seasons 7-8 weren't the best... I'm gonna assume that Dave's budget isn't going to be anywhere near the BBC's (especially in the last few years of the series)...

... Although this could be a good thing and force Doug Naylor back to basics...

All good!

Windows 7 public beta end date named

Craig Roberts


"Learning a new OS is not a fun adventure, it is a tiresome chore."

Does that mean that people who have been using Windows based OSes for years shouldn't move onto Linux then? ;)

Child porn in the age of teenage 'sexting'

Craig Roberts


.... How would a school girl SMS a picture of herself to a teachers/member of staffs phone? They shouldn't be giving their phone number out to the students!


Least the little buggers seem to have switched from Happy Slapping each other for the enjoyment of their peers... Not in my day etc etc...

Queen's speech targets bankers, unemployed, and immigrants

Craig Roberts

Small point everyone's missing...

... They want to reform the Lap dancing and Beer laws!!!

The lap dancing and the beer!!! That means less strip clubs and more expensive beer!!! For God's sake what is wrong with this government!

Screw the bankers, bollocks to the economy and who cares about the immigrants when I can't finish work (I'm one of the so far (un)lucky few who can't get himself made redundant) and pop into my local strip club next to the primary school and knock back 8 pints of wife beater during happy hour!!!


I'm serious about the beer though... As a (recently) reformed smoker, may I remind all the non-smoking drinkers that we warned you that once they were done with us that you'd be next...

No more happy hours? No more 2 for 1's?! Trying to curb binge drinking?!

If you wanna curb binge drinking, get the old bill to confiscate the beer off the feral kids that hang around outside the local off licenses and leave the over 18 year olds who work hard all bloody week to be able to afford a pint or six...

... Kill joy bastards!

Mines the one with a concealed bottle of scotch in the inside pocket.

Dixons plunges to loss

Craig Roberts


@AC (Why do you think that Gordon Brown is responsible for this? Surely every country is suffering at the moment?)

Well, mainly 'cos when our country was in the "boom" phase, we borrowed loads of money and didn't save any... Then when the world economy went "bust", we didn't have any savings... And now we're going to have to borrow a load more... However, the bloody Aussies, who had a similar period of growth to us and who actually saved are likely to do better than us in weathering the oncoming storm (the economic one - not The Doctor).

@Trevor - I DO believe that the Tories are correct in their comments about us all suffering tax hikes in 2011+ 'cos of this governments insistence on borrowing heavily and not cutting back on public spending while we're in a slump. I DON'T tend to believe everything one party says though... I can and do read more than just The Sun... ;-)

What I am REALLY looking forward to is our extravagant Olympics opening ceremony in 2012 which will probably consist of Boris, a paper Union Flag and a sparkler (which probably won't light 'cos of the rain)... "Oh... um... yes... right... the... um... the Olympics... Yes... Yes.. the Olympics... Here we are... Right then... They're... Um... open! Hurrah!"

Craig Roberts


Truly the end of "Boom and Bust"...

... Thanks a bunch Gordon!

Now - a question... Is there (and if there isn't - why the hell not?) a way for the general public to force a General Election? Vote of no confidence perhaps? Mass marching (which worked so well against the war in Iraq)? Guy Fawkes 2.0?! A Facebook group perhaps?! (Ok... That was a joke....)

Hell, if enough of us shout about it, will there be an old school yard style scrap between Brown/Darling and Cameron/Osbourne in the House Of Commons?!

I reckon Eddie Izzard had the right idea... We should "storm the House of Parliament, kick the fucking doors in, get in there and say, 'Look, we’ll pay for the damage.' Have a revolution, just budget for it, yeah? You know…"

Who's with me?!

'Bloody' is an offensive word, declares ASA

Craig Roberts


Fuck the ASA?

Tron sequel already in production

Craig Roberts


Rick Rolled on El Reg?! What the hell is this? Digg?!

Retro piracy - Should the Royal Navy kick arse?

Craig Roberts


Just a thought, but couldn't the Navy just send the pirates a strongly worded letter? Pointing out the pirates that they know what they've been doing?

"On Tuesday 11th November you boarded and captured a ship that you do not own. This is illegal. If you wanted a ship, you can buy one from services such as iBoats?"

As stated in another article, a high percentage of modern pirates stop pirating when they're educated and informed via a letter? :)

Microsoft unveils 'lightweight' Office for Web

Craig Roberts


"Easy to take days off for the telecommuters. Just say your internet was down so you couldn't do anything for 3 days... in the summer... so you went to the beach."

Shhhh! You're giving the game away! ;-)

Although I might wait until I live somewhere that actually HAS a Summer first... Global "warming" my arse!

Hoon: Not building überdatabase would be terrorist licence to kill

Craig Roberts

I agree..

Can we have a Guy Fawkes / V icon please...? :)

Das überdatabase: Inside Wacky Jacqui's motherbrain

Craig Roberts
Black Helicopters


As soon as this starts happening, I'm ditching my sexy new contract phone and buying a cheap disposable pre-pay. Then I'll dump the usual email addresses and sign up anonymously via some proxy out in South IranIraqistan for a new one...

... And then I'll buy a Guy Fawkes mask (with cash) and start causing mischief...

Do these people not watch movies/read books?!?!

Pointless being AC 'cos... Ya know... El Reg probably logs everything we do ready to hand over to our Orwellian overlords too... Not that I blame you guys... Just remember to be on the right side when the revolution comes!

On that note... I think we really do need a revolution! Who's with me? I'm free on Tuesday! :)

AT&T lifts (deleted) page from Google EULA

Craig Roberts

Is it just me?

Or does the new EULA paragraph actually mean: Whatever you upload here, we will use soley for the purpose you uploaded it. Until you delete it?

Doesn't seem too damn scary to me... Plus you're not granting them a permanent license.. So if you don't like it, you can move elsewhere....

Slow news day is it?

Anonymous hacks Sarah Palin's Yahoo! account

Craig Roberts

@Destroy All Monsters

"On the contrary - Anonymous delivers!"

They do?! Excellent... I'll have the 12" Meat Feast, 12" Seafood Special, some potato wedges, 4 cheese garlic bread and a large bottle of coke... oh - and 2 garlic and 3 chilli dips please...

And if you can nip into the Off License on the way round, that'd be grand... Thanks!

The Google-isation of all the net's access points

Craig Roberts
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Just going out on a limb here....But....

.... I kinda like it... It's bloody quick!

So far - thumbs up... There's a lot of Google hate out there since they became all "evil" or "successful"... But - fair's fair - they've still got some bloody clever people workin' for 'em....

CERN: LHC to fire first proton-smash ray next month

Craig Roberts

Frankie Boyle Got It Right...

"Scientists have just built the world's biggest supercollider, and they're doing experiments to see what makes up protons. I hope that if the experiment's successful, the whole of our reality will dissolve, and a big sign will up come that says: Level Two."


How government will save you from P2P deviance

Craig Roberts


We were discussing this down the local last night... The local with an "open to customers" policy on their wireless network...

... So what exactly would happen should a drunken customer decide (for reasons best kept to themselves) to download the latest McFly album while the BPI are monitoring?

Can the landlord be held responsible?

Do pub owners / bar staff now have to check not just for underage drinkers, illicit drug use, indoor smoking, drunken behaviour and potential kick-offerey but now also potential copyright infringement?

Could this cause the end of free open Wi-Fi?

And why would anybody want McFly's album in the first place?

These are questions that need to be answered!

CERN declares Large Hadron Collider perfectly safe

Craig Roberts

Dr Adrian Kent

As the BBC mention in their report on this matter:

"... in 2003, Dr Adrian Kent, a theoretical physicist at the University of Cambridge, wrote a paper in which he argued that scientists had not adequately calculated the risks of a 'killer strangelet' catastrophe scenario.

He also expressed concern that a fundamental question (how improbable does a cataclysm have to be to warrant proceeding with an experiment?) had never been seriously inspected."

This is a serious question... If we flick this here switch, and spin this dial, then there's a 0.837% chance that the world will end... Is it worth the risk? Who gets the say so? The scientists? The goverments who listen to the scientists? The public?

As technology and science increase the power that mankind wields, we get closer and closer to the time that we might actually be able to destroy the planet / solar system with one of our little science classes... Which while being a bit of a bugger for us, will also piss off a few Martians too... (Maybe they're watching us and as soon as they decide they don't like our odds, then it's Alien Invasion time?)

The LHC may or may not turn out to be safe, either way it looks like they're gonna switch it on anyway whether we like it or not. So hopefully, in all the theories they've paraded out to prove its viability, no-one's forgotten to carry the 3.

And what happens when they decide that this collider wasn't powerful enough to find the dark matter / higgs boson etc etc they're after?

That's ok... They'll build a bigger one... But don't panic - theoretically there's only a 0.978% chance it'll all go horribly wrong...

I'm all for science and the pursuit of knowledge... But not if there's even a small chance I could end up in a black hole... Would really put a crimp in my day that...

What hell hath science wrought lately?

Craig Roberts


To (misquote) Kyle Reese: "Listen and understand. That BigDog is out there. It can't be bargained with, it can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear, and it absolutely will not stop. Ever. Until you are dead."

If the end of the world is nigh and our new robot overlords (who obviously I welcome) are set to wipe us out in the pursuit of whatever the hell it is that big scary robots are in pursuit of...

... Does anybody want to lend me a large amount of money?

Tiscali subscribers to be sold to Vodafone tomorrow: report

Craig Roberts

I for one welcome our new Vodafone overloards...

.... Especially 'cos I bailed from Pipex when they sold out to Tiscali...

... I'm now very happy with my 24meg/sec (ok ok - actually only 20 'cos of the distance to the exchange) with no traffic shaping / cap etc etc...


Michael Bay to relive A Nightmare on Elm Street

Craig Roberts

@Will Leamon

My God!!! There's another one! I thought I was alone!!!

I too liked The Island... before the meds kicked in... Fortunately, I'm all better now...

Star Trek XI teaser trailer beams onto web

Craig Roberts

Simon Pegg...

... I couldn't care less whether his accent was authentic or not - I'd pay good money to watch the man read out his shopping list...

US man sets himself on fire and cuts off his own arm

Craig Roberts
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I vaguely remember something...

... Was this the same bloke who appeared on the Johnathon Ross show a few years back?

Incredibly brave/hard/stupid bloke...

Blokey atmos drives women away from sci/tech

Craig Roberts


My new word of the day... Ta El Reg! :)

Malware license agreement tells it straight

Craig Roberts

2 words...

... to say the same thing Microsoft have been using a thousand words to say for years...?

Pipex sale 'on the brink of collapse'

Craig Roberts


Maybe I'm just lucky - I went with Pipex as my first ADSL provider about 4-5 years ago...

I've never had any problems with them at all... The only time I've had to deal with customer support was when I re-installed and realised I'd managed to lose my login credentials... And they were spot on (ok - this was 2 years ago, but then I've not had any reason to contact support since)

I'm also wondering if all the amalgamation (there's possibly a sp there - but it's 2am, and I'm on holiday... hic!) of all these networks is a "good thing" - or are we just gonna see more collisions and downtime?

... If anyone from Pipex reads this, yes, I am available for expensive champagne style PR work.... ;-)

Personally, I'm waitin for my mate to go with Be and see what they're like... 24Mb/sec.... Mmmmmmmmmm....