* Posts by Pascal Monett

18232 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Apr 2007

HPE has 'substantially succeeded' in its £3.3bn fraud trial against Autonomy's Mike Lynch – judge

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"The finding is a massive victory for HPE"

And a clear signal that doing your own research and paying attention to due diligence isn't worth the paper its printed on.

Well done to the judge. Brilliant way to demonstrate that whining is a better strategy than paying attention.

How to get banned from social media without posting a thing

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Oh but he has reasons.

He's just not letting you know what they are.

Pascal Monett Silver badge

El Reg is most definitely not social media.

There are intelligent people here.

BOFH: On Wednesdays, we wear gloves

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Thumb Up

Another masterpiece of plausibly-deniable manipulation

This was a pleasure to read, and even more to imagine.

Well done !

Targeted ransomware takes aim at QNAP NAS drives, warns vendor: Get your updates done pronto

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"if your NAS is internet-facing"

If it is, you're a fool.

I don't care what excuses you have, allowing Internet access to your own treasure trove is asking for trouble. You are not an Infosec expert (on average) and you have no idea of what kind of nasties are floating around with the sole goal of finding your kit and ruining your day.

Convenience be damned, secure your data and cut that NAS from a world of hurt.

Toaster-friendly alternative web protocol Gemini attracts criticism for becoming exclusive clique

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Windows

Re: I'm just an old & crotchety luddite

Welcome to the club.

I do prefer Notepad++, though.

Instant Ump: HP Inc's subscription ink services hiking prices from next month

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Eliminate ink anxiety

I already have, thank you.

First of all, I don't have an HP printer, and second, I have a laser printer, so toner, not ink.

Curiously, toner makers haven't gone all Big Brother and required a chip to validate that your cartridge is kosher - yet.

Carked it, Diem? Zuckerberg's grand cryptocurrency thing may sell off assets for $200m

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Re: What is the point?

Yup. You're missing the fact that the banking industry is so crap in the US that they've had to go and invent PayPal to try and have something useful that doesn't cost an arm and a leg to transfer money (funny money actually fails on that point, with the transfer fees costing an astounding amount for just writing a few bits into the blockchain).

It's like the telephone industry of the US : so shit that calling someone in another state requires that you call an operator to handle it first. And woes be to you if the person you want to call isn't using the same telco as you. At least, that's how it was back when I last visited a decade ago. Who knows ? Maybe they've improved on that.

Meanwhile, in Europe, I can call anyone in the world without bothering with anything more than the country code before the actual phone number. I can use my banking portal to send almost any amount of money to any IBAN number. In short, I am free to talk to who I want and send money to who I want. You know, like a person should be in the 3rd millennium.

US DoD staffer with top-secret clearance stole identities from work systems to apply for loans

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"He faces up to 20 years behind bars"

Good. I hope he'll get all of them.

Now there's one thing I'd like to know : how did he get caught ?

The article states clearly what he did, but there's no mention of how he failed to keep his secret.

I'd appreciate an addendum on that.

USA kicks out China Unicom, but FCC still in pursuit

Pascal Monett Silver badge

As usual, no mention of National Security letters

Everything the US can accuse Beijing of being capable of the US has already done, and is likely actively doing now.

Any company based in the US is subject to recieving a National Security letter commanding it to hand over data or grant access to US spooks so they can check whatever they want. If you get such a letter, it is forbidden by law to talk about it and you must obey its contents.

It is quite rich to see Uncle Sam blaming Chinese companies for being subject to Beijing when the US has enshrined its own total dominance in its judicial oversight.

How can we recruit for the future if it takes an hour to send an email, asks Air Force AI bigwig in plea for better IT

Pascal Monett Silver badge

That's still $350 million that need to be found.

Not exactly pocket change when you're not a billionnaire.

ServiceNow CEO says mergers and acquisitions are off the table – too messy

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Trollface

"every day is a reason for celebration"

And that is life for the least talented bloviators with golden parachutes.

At least there's a ripe market for psychiatrists.

Burning plasma signals step forward in race for nuclear fusion as researchers get bigger capsule for their 192-laser experiment

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Coat

I have solved the problem

Puny scientists, they only used 192 lasers.

Witness the awesome power of this truly operational fusion reactor with 784 lasers !

Right, I exit stage left . . .

Court papers indicate text messages from HMRC's 60886 number could snoop on Brit taxpayers' locations

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Windows

That's actually a good question.

Especially since one can argue that a desktop PC, laptop or tablet can have much the same functionality, but without the convenience of being frisked in the street.

Oh man am I gonna be a pain in the Surveillance State' ass when I'm retired.

Imagination GPU cleared for RISC-V CPU compatibility, licensed to chip designers

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Coat

Imagination

I wonder what their on-hold music is like . . .

Hardware boffin starts work on simulation of an entire IBM S/360 Model 50 mainframe

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Windows

Oh my God : blinkenlights !

I wants one !

My precious !

Regulations and compliance are 'a curate's egg' for digital transformation, say IT pros in finance, telecoms and public sector

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"it is critical for companies to avoid vendor lock-in"

This coming from IBM.

Wow.

Something 4,000 light years away emitted strange radio bursts. This is where we talk to scientists for actual info

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Coat

I know what it is

It's OnStar testing its new Intergalactic Guardian beacon.

Soon, OnStar will be able to record you exceeded interstellar speed limits whereever you are in the galaxy.

Version 2.0 will be able to record you between galaxies !

Right, mine's the one with the beacon detector . . .

US President Joe Biden reminds the White House he is serious about repairability

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Well, it seems that there are at least three Trump fans on the loose around here.

ESA's Solar Orbiter sneaks in bonus science by choking on the dust of a comet tail (again)

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Thumb Up

Well done

Data from the inside, corroborated with data from the outside. A perfect chance, and Science is not one to waste those.

Good on all involved !

Refresh? No, F5 says supply of networking chips is still awful, getting worse...

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Re: support couldn't figure out the problem and blamed my network

What, they didn't check the logs ?

Don't they know how to read ?

What kind of shoddy "support" are you burdened with ?

Windows boss Panos Panay talks up 'new era of the PC' – translation: An era of new PCs

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Re: If you want the local weather...

I totally agree with you.

Except for that time (way back when) when I was working at a large tire maker's facilities in the northern half of Luxembourg. The entire IT department was in a vast open space - under ground.

Well, not quite underground, but without any windows, it just as well might have been (and it bloody well felt like it).

I spent two years in that troll cave. I would have appreciated having a weather app on the desktop (hey, no mobile phones back then) to tell me what I was to expect when emerging from the cave.

Now ? I've got a "smart"phone, thank you. I don't need Borkzilla to load yet another multi-megabyte thingy into my RAM to duplicate functionality I already have on my phone.

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Re: Twice. LOL right!

Given the amount of effort from Borkzilla (including things that were tantamount to bullying) to "incite" people to upgrade, the resulting uptake of Windows 1 0 was nothing to write home about.

So, for 11, they have twice o' nothing to write home about.

Carry on, Borkzilla, carry on.

Indonesia bars financial institutions from offering crypto services

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Good

The more countries hit the brakes on this despicable market, the better.

5nm? Pah. Texas Instruments focuses on 45nm+ analog, embedded electronics – and makes bank

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"a new 300-millimetre wafer fab in Sherman, Texas"

Okay, it is Texas Instruments, but still, yet another water-gobbling plant in a state that has no water.

One of these days, guys, you're going to find out that it wasn't such a good idea.

In a first, FTC extracts millions of dollars from online store accused of blocking bad reviews on its website

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Re: Yup

Well they never suppressed any reviews - it was the 3rd-party software that did that.

Not their fault, see ?

But it's fine, really. Apparently Fashion Nova has an extensive judicial budget. $9 million last year for not being guilty of withholding reimbursements, $4 million this year for not being guilty of withholding bad reviews, it seems to me that this company is ponying up a lot of money for not being guilty of anything.

I wonder what they won't be guilty of next year, and how much they'll pay ?

Indian government floats idea of home-grown challenger for Android and iOS

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"May not be the smartest move"

Sure, Borkzilla screwed the pooch over the Windows Phone, but it's a habit at Redmond to bury projects (usually after a few years of use, though).

India is a different use case. As noted, they are "fiercely patriotic". They're also quite a lot of people. It is possible that a home-grown phone could stand a fighting chance.

I'd rather like to see them try. In the event that it does fail, then we'll truly be able to go back to our newspapers and mutter "well, it's Android and Iphone from now on".

China orders web operators to spring clean its entire internet

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Why repeat ?

Well that's probably because just saying things once rarely has the desired effect when you are talking to the masses. Otherwise we wouldn't need police, because we'd just tell people to be nice and obey the law, job done.

It doesn't really work like that.

It's more than 20 years since Steps topped the charts. It could be less than that for STEP's first fusion energy

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"it's not the fusion"

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought there were still legitimate scientific issues that kept us from benefitting from endless energy generation.

So, "it's not the fusion.". Then, "it's the bureaurocracy", I gather ?

So let's take the bureaurocracy behind the chemical shed and waste them, and get ourselves ENDLESS FUSION ENERGY.

If a bunch of administrative busibodies is all that stands between me and endless energy, then I'm sorry, but there will be a few human sacrifices.

How to polish the bottom line? Microsoft makes it really hard to claim expenses, say staffers

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Trollface

"get the basics right internally"

But they did get it right internally - they sucked the willpower out of you, thereby preventing you from claiming expenses !

Job well done !

Of course, that's only true as long as long as you DECLARE NOJUSTICE and DECLARE ACCEPTSLAVERY, but don't worry, Borkzila has set YES as defaults on those parameters.

James Webb Space Telescope has arrived at its new home – an orbit almost a million miles from Earth

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Thumb Down

It's space. The JWST is the first of its kind.

I'd like to see the telescope you build from scratch.

IBM finally finds a private equiteer willing to purchase Watson Health

Pascal Monett Silver badge

“IBM remains committed to Watson"

Right, that's it. When IBM remains committed to something, you can be sure they're shutting it down in the near future.

We need an End-of-the-Line icon.

Australian Prime Minister's WeChat Shanghaied by Chinese patriots

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"Other members of the government have concluded"

Without any facts to base the conclusion on.

Don't you just love it when someone hears that something has happened and immediately concludes that some third party is responsible ?

Must be a sign of certain intelligence </sarc>.

Myanmar's military junta seeks ban on VPNs and digital currency

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Big Brother

Nothing should be able to thwart the Great Eye of Surveillance

And anything that does is automatically criminal and unacceptable.

You will hide nothing, but you will still live in fear.

Another US president, time for another big Intel factory promise by another CEO

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Wishful thinking

"a signal to China and to the rest of the world that from now on our essential manufactured products in this country will be made in the United States of America"

So, clothes are not essential ?

It would be hilarious if Beijing answered : "Fine, make your sweatpants now" and closed down all the sweatshops that toil for next to nothing to provide us with our precious Gucci and GAP trinkets (that we pay hand over fist for).

Tougher rules on targeted ads, deepfakes, crafty web design, and more? Euro lawmakers give a thumbs up

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"technology will continue impacting societies in the future"

Technology has always impacted society.

The discovery of fire allowed our ancestors to learn how to cook, thereby making eating easier (and more delicious), thereby making our teeth last longer. And now, we need less of them.

Agriculture allowed us to settle and start building civilization, instead of roaming around after the herds for our sustenance.

Steam ushered in the Industrial Age, which ultimately removed the obligation for 99.9% of humanity to be farmers. We could now devote more people to Science, Mathematics, discovery end experimentation, which ultimately gave us the computer, the Internet and, recently, social media. That last one might not be progress after all.

Technologies to look forward to ? Fusion, obviously, but also room-temperature supraconductivity, gravity modulation, true spaceships. Not all of that might happen, but whichever ones do, they will have an immense impact on our society.

Intel plunking down $20bn for at least two chip factories in Ohio

Pascal Monett Silver badge

What ? Ohio ? Not Texas ?

Oh dear me, is there some level of Hell that is freezing over now ?

Oh wait, silly me, it's just that backstabbing is just as lively inside the Union as from the outside.

At least, this time, it's more logical since Ohio is actually next to available water.

Carry on . .

'Please download in Microsoft Excel': Meet the tech set to monitor IT performance across central UK government

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"please download the workbook in Microsoft Excel for the best user experience"

I have yet to have trouble opening an Excel file in LibreOffice.

It's a great user experience because I don't have Borkzilla's 365Eye watching everything I do while just looking over some numbers.

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Yeah, but there might be kids around.

Or PC* nazis, which are the same intellectual level.

*) not the computer

BOFH: What a beautiful classic car. Shame if anything were to happen to it

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Trollface

Depends. Do you have a beard ?

'Can you identify your assailants?' Yes, they were pixelated! I'd know them anywhere!

Pascal Monett Silver badge

WHAT !?!

The Mozartkügel is no more ?

That's it, life is no longer worth living. Unless . . somebody picks up the recipe and starts anew (no, not you, Nestlé, nor Mars, Hershey's or Ferrero).

We need an icon that represents pure, abject terror. I'm sure there's some of painting that could do.

Why should I pay for that security option? Hijacking only happens to planes

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"the blood drained from his face before he turned around and told me I could leave"

I would not have left promptly.

I would have stalled just a few seconds, looking him straight in the eyes, before slowly turning and exiting the room.

The silence might have been awkward, but not for me.

UK, Australia, to build 'network of liberty that will deter cyber attacks before they happen'

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Re: Demockracy

Yeah. Crazy how all these uppity "democratic" countries are currently doing a whole lot in complete secrecy, isn't it ?

Like not revealing the contract signed with Pfizer. Why ? My tax money went into that agreement. I think I have the right to know what the agreement is.

If you want less CGI and more real effects in movies, you may get your wish: Inflatable film studio to orbit Earth

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"It's incredibly expensive to get into space, [..] That's the main hurdle."

Well, there's also the niggling little detail that you just might go boom trying to get there.

And when I read that, before hauling up the gigantic tennis ball, they first have to add an entire new module to the ISS, well here's me saying nope, won't happen.

Not unless they have an entire multiverse planned and we are on track for getting a dozen films with genuine weightlessness - which will likely get boring right around the second film, or the third at best, if the first two were good.

Bullet-time was an incredible gimmick when The Matrix served it up for the first time. It has rarely been so well used since. I'm guessing zero-gee won't fare much better.

Finally, they need to do more than break even if they intend to make more than one film. If, before you've even started filming, you've already slashed $200 million from your budget, well you'd better pray that the public is going to flock to the cinemas in droves to see your film because otherwise, that space module will end up as additional storage space until the ISS is decommissioned and sent to burn up in the atmosphere.

Russia's Putin out the idea of a broad cryptocurrency ban

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Somehow, this had to happen

Having an unregulated currency in Putinland was always something of a surprise to me. When China put the kibosh on funny money, it was a "duh" moment, because of course the PRC government was not going to accept people having anything out of its control.

I think that the only reason Putin has not yet actually put his foot down on this market is because of all the blackhats he has creating mischief and mayhem everywhere else. He might lop off a head here and there, when the Western nations come crying too loudly, but otherwise it's all good for him.

Now the central bank is saying nuh-uh. It'll be interesting to see how this goes.

Japan's Supreme Court rules cryptojacking scripts are not malware

Pascal Monett Silver badge

"crypto mining software is not malware"

Okay, in the absolute, it isn't malware as such because it does not take over the computer and attempt anything else, fine.

It is still theft, though. It is using someone else's resources without their knowledge or consent.

So he should not get off scott-free.

Privacy is for paedophiles, UK government seems to be saying while spending £500k demonising online chat encryption

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Mushroom

"Privacy is for paedophiles"

I totally agree.

At the condition that every single government and wannabe-government email is publicly exposed for all to see.

After all, you've got nothing to hide, right ?

Web daddy Tim Berners-Lee on privacy, data sharing, and the web's future

Pascal Monett Silver badge
Mushroom

"bank transactions go to your Solid pod"

Fuck that.

My bank transactions go into my bank history and there ain't no fucking Pod that has the right to hoard that data.

Sir Berners-Lee, with all due respect, stop trying to shoehorn every aspect of my private life into something Google, the NSA and every other skiddie with a keyboard can index.

NortonLifeLock and Avast tie-up falls under UK competition regulator's spotlight

Pascal Monett Silver badge

It seems that that is the inevitable progression in the AV industry.

You start with a good product that is efficient and not resource-hogging. And it's free.

It gains momentum until such a point that it starts hobbling its free version and encouraging you, nicely at first, to fork over for the Premium version.

Then the MBAs take control, the product ends up going full Frankenstein and not only takes over your PC but also hassles you into paying ever more for additional "functionality" you don't give flying one about.

Then the next free version of something else pops up and you're on the next treadmill.

It's almost as if there was an AI behind all this . . .

The robots are coming! 12 million jobs lost to automation in Europe by 2040 – analyst

Pascal Monett Silver badge

Oh. My. God.

Borkzilla ? Still ? In 2060 ?

Kill me now.

Can we have a hangman's noose icon ?