Posts by BitBotherer

Groupon offer burns cupcake baker’s profits

Lost £12,000

Gained at least £200,000 advertising, maybe the best deal the lady ever made.

Don't buy your iPad in a McDonald's car park

MDF News.

Mom and dad had gone to Aspen a Poplar resort for the weekend so being quite a useless Beech and unable to cook she went with her friend Holly to macdonalds and had a Hickory smoked burger and pancakes with Maple syrup afterwards they smoked some Bush sitting under an Oak tree in the carpark and were approached by two guys and in Plane view of everyone in the restaurant sold them Knot an iPad but more an iBoard.

Not one to Pine on her losses she moved to Oaklahoma to stay with her Elder sister where she lost her Cherry and soon Driftwooded into petty crime and was arrested for Larcheny and selling 'ash ..........

Anonymous and LulzSec spew out largest ever police data dump

@5.antiago

In some communities ''the majority of informants are everyday members of the public, like old ladies on council estates.''

In others they are traitors to their families and those very same communities and deserve everything they get.

There fixed that for ya.

Gordon Ramsay menaced by enormous TURKEY

UK place names

Pishil and Stonor, somewhere in Oxfordshire I think and there is a signpost with both names on it, that's all.

Hack attacks on US could spark military action

"Jeez every sheetwearing klan boy or book burning christian pastor is gonna love this one."

Ha ha. Thats probably who its aimed at.

Apple seeks patent for keyboard that sucks

Hot air

Not to bothered about quality keyboards at the speed I type but maybe it could dual function by removing the heat from the processor. Could be driven by the waste heat, theres a green idea,

Average Brit has three mysterious keys

I wonder

Like a password? If you get picked up by the police and do not tell them what the keys that you have forgotten about are for, is it an offence?

Net censors use UK's kid-safety frenzy to justify clampdown

@ Ooo-wait-BUT!

You missed 'ale tit'

World leaders meet to discuss cyberwar rules of engagement

Rules of engagement?

There will be none!

Robot wars break out on poker sites

Online poker

I have been playing poker with humans for twenty years, a couple of years ago I played online for two months or so, just to try it.

Apart from the fact that you really need to look into the eyes of your opponents there was something that just didn't feel right about the way a lot of games turned out, there was just too much scope for fraud, I used to imagine an admin sitting in front of a monitor turning a dial like an old fashioned volume knob tweaking the housebots % depending on who was playing and the size of the pots, extracting as much as possible without anyone noticing.

So I stopped playing.

It's more akin to putting money in a 'one armed bandit' than poker.

Nominet forgets what the first .uk domain name was

Norn iron

How about i.soiam.ni

Distressed cock whipped out of wheelie bin

He read

the story about woman+cat+wheelie bin and thought fuck it I can do more than 17 hours but some do gooder pulled him out before he got in the Guiness book of records.

It's friday and on a clear day you can smell the pub from here.

Wheelie bin

I can get three sheep in my wheelie but they makes a lot of noise and it scares the postman or one cow but I need my friends to help me and where would you get a cow around here ffs.

Check Point kills scareware-style pop-up campaign

Title, no I am a republican

Me too, just dumped it a couple of weeks ago, got fed up of the incessant pop ups trying to get me to upgrade. It used to be good.

IT engineer fights spider with improvised flamethrower

Methane

His wife discovered the spider. She was having a dump, started screaming, forgot to flush and along came our hero and blew himself up on her gaseous emanations.

I would be fucking embarrassed to go to hospital with singed fingers.

NASA: Civilization will end in 2013 (possibly)

List of fucked things

I wish to add:

The Gulf of Mexico

Sparrows

Apple revamps Mac Mini as skinny HDMI box

Title? call me sir.

I love the way people say £650! I could build that for a tenner out of my spares box, they seem to forget the couple of hours to put it all together and the rest of the day searching for drivers to make it all work, yeah right add a days pay to that. anyway wait a month or two and it'll be 500 quid.

'Martin Mills you are a LEGEND!'

F,kin money

What about the musicians/artist whose first consideration is not money.

Cat pigeons.

Cameron aims to bring LibDems into government

No

Yes and why have a referendum on the issue we didn't need one re. the EU. Clegg should demand it as his price.

Terrorism chiefs don't know what they've censored online

@David W

"Or, at least, without a peep that stays up on the internet for long"

I think we have now reached the point where taking the p*** out of you guys is no longer justifiable, we don't havethe moral high ground anymore instead we are heading down a quickly steepening slope.

ISS piss recycler packs up again on eve of Atlantis visit

Eh!

Nobody said anything about rat piss when I started Astronought school.

Pentagon hacker McKinnon earns extradition delay

@ Justin Smith

Do your research before you make claims like that, yes the US say they have an extradition treaty with the UK, the key word is "roughly" it is very one sided.

Blunkett signed away a swathe of our rights in June 2003.

"Under the new treaty, the allegations of the US government will be enough to secure the extradition of people from the UK. However, if the UK wants to extradite someone from the US, evidence to the standard of a "reasonable" demonstration of guilt will still be required." quote Ben Hayes of Statewatch.

There any many other unfavourable terms (to the UK citizen) in this 'treaty' http://www.statewatch.org/news/2003/jul/25ukus.htm

Extradite a suspect to a country that does not respect decisions made by the International Court of Justice, a country that refuses to allow members of it's armed forces to be tried in International courts for serious war crimes, a country that imprisons suspects in military prisons without trial, a country that openly condones and pratices torture. Bollix.

Mc Kinnon should fight this all the way, he cannot possibly get a fair unbiased trial in the US.

Son of 419 victim contacts El Reg

419er

I think the correct term is 'Reverse Nigerian'

How ComScore can track your mouse clicks

@Jose Ramirez

If the MAJORITY of people in your country voted to kill anyone with the name Ramirez, that would be a democratic decision wouldn't it.

Doesn't make it right though. Twat.

Home Secretary goes crazy on drugs... policy

Gloucester under siege

Heres one way to get the police around next time you need them, tell them you are about to cut your own car in half, FFS talk about an over reaction 5 police cars and ten plod plus the fire brigade. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/gloucestershire/7395452.stm

Think of all the children left unprotected.

How many staff has HMRC caught snooping on records?

Can't resist

Imagine working all day in a boring job you hate, and theres a button at the top of your screen and you know if you click it you will be fired, maybe if I just have a quick look no one will know, no no its too risky, click click oh shit I didn't mean it.

May as well get my coat now maybe I will take a few other coats as well no no too risky oh f.... it.

Brown opts for morality over science on 'lethal skunk'

Time for a change

How can someone smart enough to attain the level of Prime Minister make such stupid statements. As a one time Labour voter I begrudge having ever voted for them, never again. We have lost more personal freedoms and civil liberties under this government than any other in living memory, there is a wave of dissatisfaction sweeping through the country, most thinking people are sick of being lied to, cheated, spied on,,,, are you listening Mr. Brown, there are hundreds of thousands of people out there like me. There I've had my rant.

On a lighter note, I have just recovered from an operation for cancer followed by three months of chemotherapy, out of the sackfulls of drugs I was given to combat the awful side affects of chemo. nothing worked better than a nice bit of skunk!

We badly need a revolution.

A dead Penguin or is it a Dodo to represent this Gov.uk

Brown ignores scientists and pushes pot reclassification

Smoke screen

Seems to me Gordon Brown needs something to appease the baying masses and sweep under the table important issues like recent Data loses, Phorm, BT pimping our data, massive loss of civil liberties since Labour came to power.

As Anonymous said time to get the pitchforks out, anyway I'm of for a smoke.

Carphone Warehouse stares down BPI and UK.gov on three strikes

Well done

At last an ISP with bollocks all they need to do now is dump Phorm, there will be a hefty market share for secure Phorm free ISPs, mark my words.

BAA grounds Heathrow T5 fingerprinting system

Now I get it

They have pulled their resources because they need an Information System to clear the gypsies from Tessa Jowells back-yard.