I would like to apologise to our customers who may have recently become aware that all our software included a key-logger which was sending everything typed back to ourselves. That data was permanently stored, and forwarded to all our partners, but only in accordance with our policies.
While we indiscriminately logged everything typed I would like to assure everyone that this has affected only a small number of customers and I again confirm that customer safety, security and privacy is our number one priority.
I can reassure customers that their data was only ever shared with third parties we agreed to share it with. We are confident there is no evidence data has been misused and will ask our partners to confirm that.
The key-logging software was part of our diagnostic suite intended to improve customer experience which was inadvertently left enabled for the past decade due to an oversight. We did not realise this as we stored your data and passed it on. The logger's ability to hide from anti-virus checkers and malware detectors was due to accidentally using code from a different product. This was entirely unintentional.
We would like to assure our customers that no harm was intended and can confirm they can continue using our installed software. We have not misused customer data and never would. We must however ask Mr Peabody-Smythe to refrain from describing us as "lying wanker bastards" whenever he refers to us in his emails to friends.