Posts by Col

Heaviest Virgin Media downloaders face new daytime go-slow

Outages

I was working in a virgin media server suite just off the m4 when they were testing the backup generators, they turned the mains off and all the servers went onto the ups system which promptly crashed.

Turned out the backup generator diesel engine was having an oil and filter change by a nice old boy smoking a roll-up whose van had been parked outside all morning. Took over two hours before they got it powered up again and god knows how long before it was running up to speed.

Lots of cheery virgin types running round with their arses in their hands.

They do have a pro foosball table in the canteen stairwell so at least you know where your moneys going.

I.T. because nobody knew where IT went.

Germany to Nokia: Give us back our subsidies

Going the way of the great Auk.

The manufacturing heart moves east, so does the money, plenty of eastern europeans moving west too, working for half the money their western counterparts will accept.

Its economic migration, they'll stop mowing west when theres no disparity in the wages due to the money going east.

Stupidest thing you could do, try and stop it by throwing government money at the problem, raising taxes in the process and making the playing field even less level.

Wonder if I can mix any more metaphors before i say we deserve everything we get?

Flores Hobbits were stunted humans

Show me the bones!

So where are the skeletons of the parents? Surely the fact that the only bones found were those of the alleged 'cretins' would point to the fact that there were onlt 'cretins' there?

Polish builder sacked for humping hoover

Dust aplenty

I fit fire alarms in server cabins etc, I've had to resort to henry before now, 'builders bum' is not only an eyesore, it is also a means of ingress to your nether regions for all manner of cheery void space itchy stuff.

Still its all relative, i was caught short on my way home from school as a boy and wiped my arse with rockwool, now there was an interesting sensation for a couple of weeks.....