Posts by Steve

iPhone users to walk and read at same time

left and right

Does it look left and right before stepping off the kerb?

DHS tests bomb-proof CCTV by blowing up bus

Err, it's not CCTV

CCTV involves the signal being displayed on a monitor and/or being transmitted - the hint is in the name.

It's a bomb-proof video camera/recorder.

Call yourself a technical publication? I suggest you shuffle off to the Daily Mail. Shame on you.

El Reg Street View snappers caught on camera

So what happened to the map you promised in the bootnote?

Here's my entry, Tottenham sunbather...

http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=141+sunny+gardens+road+nw4&sll=51.51925,-0.315728&sspn=0.00693,0.017231&ie=UTF8&ll=51.596641,-0.225434&spn=0.006918,0.017231&z=16&iwloc=addr&layer=c&cbll=51.596728,-0.225402&panoid=SMPdtdqr4VpAo2OjVUnX9A&cbp=12,288.8374171264795,,1,9.931506849315069

Wacky Jacqui spanked by husband

Priceless

Cost of two grumble flicks - £10.

Look on Wacky Jacqui's face when confronting husband - priceless.

Nokia to fire 1,700 staff

first to go

I hope the 'designer' of the 6500c charger circuit is the first to go. It's a pile of stinking dingo's kidneys, lots of user complaints and no acknowlegement from Nokia.

DLNA compliance testing: It ain't working

Pile of stinking dingo's kidneys

From bitter experience I would say that at best DNLA support is pants.

I've struggled to get Windows Media Player to consistently talk to my PS3, and likewise with Google's media server. Timeouts, missing media, a whole host of problems.

The only product that's actually worked for me is 'PS3 Media Server' which despite it's name, isn't just for the PS3, and it's a one man and his dog outfit that seems to actually know how to write software.

Axl Rose may have undermined own case over Dr Pepper stunt

Why would anyone want that tasteless sh1t?

...or a can of Dr Pepper come to that.

US prosthetic todger pair plead guilty to conspiracy

Where can I get a black one?

size large, obviously.

Scots vote out ID cards

Phythonian?

Congratulations, you've invented a new word.

McCain gets pair of personal cellphone towers

Grammar

Please stop splitting your infinitives.

Citroën sparks electric C-Cactus production plan

It looks like a Mini?

How exactly? Because it's small and has 4 wheels?

Armed cops ice South London devil dog

firearms officers popped a cap in the satanic mutt's ass

So, any news on the dog's donkey that was shot?

Ofcom: No premium numbers for previous offenders

Would that include...

...the BBC and ITV?

Hack ushers in the insatiable toll booth

researcher said Wednesday

Why did the researcher say Wednesday? What does this have to do with the story?

Wii aids family togetherness, report claims

Bears

...and in their next survey they reveal that bears sh1t in the woods and the pope does have a balcony, and is, wait for it... catholic.

Sony to sell 80GB PS3 at 40GB price

...because supplies of 40gb drives are drying up

Simple - they are adding 80gb drives because production of teeny weenie 40gb drives is winding up - it would be cheaper to buy 80gb drives than 40gb because there is more demand for 80gb drives across all markets, hence economy of scale.

80gb is still fairly pants, but an upgrade to 320gb is fairly cheap and easy.

Boris' crime map plan comes unstuck

repurposed

Please add this to the list of banned words. Thanks.

PETA offers $1m for test tube chicken

@ Andy Worth

What you foresee already exists - it's called the USA.

Biometric methadone dispensers tested on UK lags

@ s. pam

Start Button, Run..., calc, 3500000 / 100 = ?

Spooks want to go fishing in Oyster database

@ amanfromMars

I understood the individual words, but as a paragraph, WTF are you on about?

Total lunar eclipse: look skywards Wednesday

...skywards Wednesday?

It's bad enough that BT are going to 'change Thursday' according to a later headline. Now you've invented 'Skywards Wednesday'. What is Skywards Wednesday, is it like Shrove Tuesday? Or are you suffering americanitis and mean '... skywards on Wednesday? Speak English man.

BT business customer contracts to change Thursday

...to change Thursday

What do you mean, they are going to change Thursday? Can't they leave it as the 24 hours between Wednesday and Friday? Or are you suffering americanitis and mean '...on Thursday'? Speak English man.