* Posts by Jim McCafferty

38 posts • joined 18 Feb 2008

Fresh cup of WTF with lunch? TeamViewer's big in Twitter's domination-as-a-service scene

Jim McCafferty

Re: To do the same for free...

Back in the good old days of NT, one of our colleagues was a Man Utd fan. When he left his PC unlocked, we installed an exe running on a timer which periodically changed his desktop background to Arsenal. He immediately took to locking his PC at that point - by that stage it was too late.

Another one is the 2nd wireless keyboard trick (insignificant USB dongle recommended). The joker didn't press keys all the time. He monitored our colleague, and pressed single keys when he was in important dialog boxes (like logins). The prank ended shortly before an imminent nervous breakdown.

You know that silly fear about Alexa recording everything and leaking it online? It just happened

Jim McCafferty

Nothing to see here - move along.

Guys, guys, calm down. This wasn't a massive breach of privacy - it was just a dodgy "if" statement. We'll fix it in the next patch.

Capita data centres hit by buttload of outages

Jim McCafferty

Pot and Kettle

The article suffered an outage in the first sentence...

NASA finds satellite, realises it has lost the software and kit that talk to it

Jim McCafferty

Come on Fess up NASA... you're using Sourcesafe and are too ashamed to admit it...

Microsoft breaks Office 365 sign-in pages ahead of surprise update

Jim McCafferty

Unique Identifier

I still have moments of irrational rage when I enter my email address, and then the second dialog asks me what type of email address is this? An email address is recognised throughout the internet as a unique user identifier, but Microsoft have managed to turn it into a combined key - inside its own network?

One suggestion - how about MS mothballs the 15,000 disconnected servers in it's infrastructure, and has a single point of authentication with the email address as the identifier? Then have permissions hang off that login which dictate which services the user currently has live roles in? It's what they've been preaching in their training courses...

Don't – don't – install iOS 9.3 on your iPad 2: Upgrade bricks slabs

Jim McCafferty

A Complete Farce

This is a complete joke - Part of Apple's mantra is it has a closed ecosystem so it can maximise control over hardware and software. They have a small range of 100% compliant devices to maintain. Compared to other operating systems with more complexity (and smaller profit margins), Apple's complexity issues are highly manageable.

For models like the iPAD2, they should have put a ceiling on the operating system and provided security updates at a minimum. Block App Store installs for products using features which exceed the device's capabilities. Every update is degrading the performance further. "If you think it's slow, maybe you should upgrade" is not a sensible technology strategy. Mind you, they're still making ridiculous profits, and people (like myself) are still buying their products - so hey, what do I know?

TalkTalk incident management: A timeline

Jim McCafferty

' OR 1=1.

Just checking.

JJ Abrams and Star Wars: I've got a bad feeling about this

Jim McCafferty

Amen to That

An excellent article which captures everything that no one around me seems to care about.

Star Trek was an excellent reboot - in the sense that the audience interest graph stayed pretty much in the high end for most of the two films. There was swizzy technology, audience demographic involvement - and young rebellious children who could grow up to save the universe. Yay.

But in comparison to the previous incarnations the whole experience left me cold. The referential humour was butt clenchingly meta (good: Community, bad: Terminator 3) - and the whole Khan plot tried to be so clever it just came across as stupid (particularly to anyone who hadn't actually seen Wrath). The Federation as a totalitarian government was very hip and modern but again - did we need this change of direction?

I think Star Wars success was down to it being an original story which had been crafted together for years in Lucas and other people's minds. The technology was limited so they had to make it count. It was politically and historically referential but subtlely enough for it not to make people instantly identify with it. If we can have more of that then I'd be happy.

Today's bugs have BRANDS? Be still my bleeding heart [logo]

Jim McCafferty

Verity is back

Great to see another article - always the best read of a given month.

Any chance of upping the frequency a tad? :)

All men are part of a PURE GENETIC ELITE, says geno-science bloke

Jim McCafferty

One gene?

OK - so there's one gene which determines whether you're male or female. It's a very selective interpretation that says men own this gene - and women have exclusive access to the others? Surely it's the resultant combination of all the genes that defines us.

It may be ILLEGAL to run Heartbleed health checks – IT lawyer

Jim McCafferty

In my defence

To be honest your Honour,

I wasn't aware that issuing the Ping command 5 times in a row against Google.co.uk would be considered a denial of service attack.

Windows XP still has 27 per cent market share on its deathbed

Jim McCafferty

Go Vista

lol Popularity spike in December 2013.

Torvalds rails at Linux developer: 'I'm f*cking tired of your code'

Jim McCafferty


The Register (among others) seem to be drawn towards highlighting Linus' reaction to this particular incident and the short term consequences of it - "systemd have issued a patch and the world is OK" - implying (not for the first time) that Linus has overreacted.

Some basic research on Linux discussion boards (including the bug entry on the systemd) would highlight that this issue doesnt just include the 2 people involved - but teams of developers which have had a less than rosy relationship - particularly when integration issues crop up - and the affronted parties have been "controversial" in their system changes on a number of occasions.

Is the Register peeved because Linus may actually be enforcing some sort of hierarchy?

Pegatron goes on hiring spree as iPhone 6 release date approaches

Jim McCafferty

What in disguise?

An Evil Pegasus Transformer - Michael Bay are you listening?

Sorry... just desecrated a very highbrow tech article.. but its 17:10 and we're out of coffee.

MtGox has VANISHED. So where have all the Bitcoins gone?

Jim McCafferty

Too many palms, not enough faces

I loved the html comment in the page source. This is a company that just *know* security.

Hypersonic MEGA METEOR pulled from lake, then Russians drop it

Jim McCafferty

Anything unusual in the composition analysis? 23% unknown for instance? Was there a glowing green tinge to the fragment.

Oh well. Wait for the next one.

Voyager 1 'close' to breaking through to DEEP SPACE - boffins

Jim McCafferty

Set Phasers to 8mm

A lot of people dismiss Star Trek - The Motion Picture as an average Sci-Fi Flick - turns out it was a documentary.

Massive EXPLOSION visible to naked eye SEEN ON MOON

Jim McCafferty

Which way do we point the dish?

NASA in "Whoops, we didn't see that large rock hurtling towards us" isolated incident.

Star Trek: The original computer game

Jim McCafferty

Basic Fail

I remember spending hours typing basic programs into my spectrum - just to see them fail horribly. Then one day I discovered the colon key - and realised it reset the cursor back to "K", allowing you to enter multiple commands on a single line. Hey ho.

COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO: NASA rovers scrawl giant willy on Mars

Jim McCafferty

Blatant cymbal crash gag

BOTANY BAY?!!? Not the Botany Bay!!!

BlackBerry OS 10.1 leaks its secret goo over all the web

Jim McCafferty

Slightly Irritated from Tunbridge Wells

Low Signal to Noise ratio thread my backside.

"Full leaked OS direct from Blackberry".

Is it the full OS?

Will it break my phone?

Will it work with security restrictions?

etc, etc


NASA chief: Earth is DOOMED if we spot a big asteroid at short notice

Jim McCafferty


Asteroid heading towards earth - "Don't worry folks, we've had it on the radar for months. Nothing to see here. We're definitely not incompetent."

Asteroid passes the earth - (Hang on there's the opportunity for some funding here). "Yeah, Earth's detection systems are woefully inadequate - we need lots of more cash now. Before you spend it all on healthcare."

Carrie Fisher dusts off THAT bikini for Star Wars VII

Jim McCafferty



(flaring lights reflecting off the camera).

"The Millenium Falcon's being dragged into a black hole."

"Ah... this sounds like an excellent opportunity to change our entire universe."

'Mainframe blowout' knackered millions of RBS, NatWest accounts

Jim McCafferty

Just Joshing...

The Government have said they will sell their holding in RBS when the stock price reaches a certain level. What if someone decided they didn't like that idea? This little incident will put that sale in doubt.

After the last mainframe blow out - one would have thought the place would have been running a bit better - I take it other banks aren't experiencing similar outages?

OEMs and sellers must pay refunds on software faults - OFT

Jim McCafferty

Hopefully, this will encourage hardware manufacturers to sharpen up on their backup disks. I had a problem with my Blu Ray software, and after numerous rather detailed queries to the company, was given the lazy brushoff with it should work fine if you reinstall the OEM software. My laptop manufacturer provided a DVD ROM, but the autosetup only offered the option to reinstall windows!

I think they'll want to separate the software packages in future to limit their liability.

First Irish-speaking virus holds bloke's computer to ransom

Jim McCafferty

More Father Ted

The Virus was only resting on my hard drive.

How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love IPv6

Jim McCafferty
Thumb Up

Re: and........



Jim McCafferty
Thumb Up

Great stuff

I have to say I have had my doubts of thee of late, Ms Stob, but this is a return to form.

Young alcoholic star 'covered in fluids needed for birth of alien life'

Jim McCafferty
Black Helicopters

Read the Question all the way through before answering.....

When I read the headline first, I assumed the register was doing an expose on (the real) LOHAN.

Deadly domino effect of extinction proved by boffins

Jim McCafferty

Infamy, they've all got it infamy

The timing of the reporting of this is somewhat suspicious, given the other story about algae changing in the arctic. Have the greenies given up trying to predict earth scorching temperatures and moved on to a new plan of action?

Jim McCafferty

Re: Damn these deadly dominos!

I always felt a bit jaded watching them on Record Breakers. An entire ecosystem destroyed in 5 minutes.

Return to Castle Wolfenstein

Jim McCafferty

My aching bones

I never thought Return to Castle Wolfenstein would make it to the retro archive - Wolfenstein in 3D was supposed to be the golden oldie! Feeling very old....

Hours of fun - especially the enemy territory mod - until the cheaters started clearing the beach level with rocket jumps.

My only complaint was the overheating guns... usually malfunctioninh at a point where the scene in front of you needed serious lead injection lest the consequences were not particularly pretty.

Adobe Cloud offers leg up over Creative Suite's price wall

Jim McCafferty

Re: Still to expensive...

Elements is cynically aimed at the home users market - which just enough functionality to satisfy the casual hobbyists manage their photo collection - and at the price it's still not cheap.

Most major software development companies now offer free basic editions or reasonable monthly subscription rates for on demand. Even with the exchange rate - the Adobe collection is not cheap.

Minecraft maker plots ultimate videogame for coders

Jim McCafferty


I like the way this guy thinks.

Vote now for the WORST movie EVER

Jim McCafferty


There aren't many films on that list where I thought "My God, I've just wasted 2 hours of my life."

Mind you, during Avatar - I walked out of the cinema because I deemed a low priority task to be more important that watching the end.

There's another category film - when a friend mentions it to you and you completely draw a blank. You're sitting watching it on telly and only at a point approximately 45 minutes in, the entire plotline dawns on you and you realise you've watched it at least 5 times. US Marshals/Double Jeopardy (or was it idemnity - the one with Tommy Lee Jones), anyone?

LG Optimus 3D dual core Android smartphone

Jim McCafferty


Exactly what I was about to post......

Drought effect on rainforests is negligible

Jim McCafferty


Title says it all really. Here I am turning on the television, expecting to see the Undertaker take down Stone Cold Steve Austin and then there's a bunch of Pandas on the screen. And now it's not even just Pandas any more.

When are they going to find time to toodle off to Africa to prevent nasty poachers from shooting elephants if they're too busy criticising me for how much water I'm putting in my kettle?

Every business is required to fill out a business plan, and these plans have a tendency to focus on specifics.

This paragraph would suggest otherwise:

"However, as the organization grew over the 70s and into the 80s, WWF began to expand its work to conserve the environment as a whole (reflecting the interdependence of all living things), rather than focusing on selected species in isolation. So, although we continued to use our well-known initials, during the 80s our legal name became "WWF-World Wide Fund For Nature" (formerly World Wildlife Fund - except in North America where the old name was retained)."

In other words, we're taking a leaf out of BBC's book. We've realised the global marketing sledgehammer called "Global Warming" is a bandwagon too sweet to miss, and we've got to be on board. Conserving endangered animals does not tick those boxes, so our corporate message must be as fuzzy and vague as possible. We can tick more boxes that way when the funding application forms arrive.

Credibility? - Overrated in this day and age. The real question people should be asking is where the heck is the authority who should be ripping the IPCC to pieces round about now. Someone's head should be on a pole, if credibility and science are the name of the game.

.... and breathe. No, it's ok Nurse, I don't need my medication.

Time to rewrite DBMS, says Ingres founder

Jim McCafferty

Viva la Revolucion

T-SQL has been the bane of my life. After spending years perfecting skills in functional languages, learning database dos turned my hair grey,

You have one SQL Server. You need to talk to another SQL Server. Let's play a game of match up the 25,000 single quotes and consult the Oracle (no pun intended) whether the engine's going to try and pull back 8 million records before carrying out the where clause.

Surely the time has come when we can eliminate the need to communicate with database servers through single terminated lines of pseudo english.


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