Posts by sue

Microhoo! or YahSoft!? The! people! must! decide!

Maybe they should really mix it up......

How about:

'Micro Oaf Shy Too' or 'Shot Cia From Yoo' or my fave, 'Farty Coo Ish Moo'

Microsoft! bids! $44.6bn! for! Yahoo!

ARGH!

No no no no no no no!

It was bad enough when my stuff became BTYahoo! I like certain things about MS stuff, but please please please keep them separate from Yahoo!

Employee's silent rampage wipes out $2.5m worth of data

@-@ AC:Date recovery By Anonymous Coward

Just jump down off your horse there for a mo, and give El Reg credit for being read by, and educational for, more than just speaky in a freaky computy way people.

Having said that, your post did offer handy information, so you're almost forgiven for assuming.

//A housewife.

Beeb censors Fairytale of New York

@ Andrew Garrard

Re: 'Rock Star' - was channel hopping during adverts about 5am and MTV 1 I think were playing it, and blanked out 'drug dealer'

All the networks are inconsistent because everyone is trying to be goody two shoes and pre-empt the next addendum to some oddball law. In my opinion anyway.

Space brains resign over efforts to attract ET attention

Maybe I missed it.......

but I can't believe no one has said that should the arguing win around to sending out these beams, and let's face it, that in itself will probably take millions of various currency and decades of political/scientific bods to just come up with a firm decision, and E.T. decides to pay a visit, the first thing we should all remember is 'Don't panic!'

Lost HMRC discs pop up on eBay

@ Spbmssen

I think he's either a bot, or one of the reg hacks (bless 'em) on a dare to fit in as many obscure references as they come up with over a few bevvies on a Friday.

Beer set to hit four quid a pint

and you drink this stuff?

"The company has fingered higher aluminium, cereal and crude oil costs as the cause."

Glad I don't drink....crude oil and Rice Krispies beer? bad enough, but think of the company bods having fingered your aluminium cans first!

TV-Links man was arrested under trademark laws

@F. A .C.T. I want to watch the last season of Oz.

"It was aired on channel 4 but i was unable to watch it due to work hours.

I'm owed the opportunely to see it for the cost of my license fee alone. Tv-links aloud me that opportunely I had already paid for.This is why i used the site."

Wrong. The licence fee covers only the BBC. Which is why you don't have the chance to make a cuppa or dash to the loo when an opportune ad break arrives, as with other channels.

Schoolkid chipping trial 'a success'

aha!

Now I know how to make sure El Reg gets put onto the national curriculum...

lets go the whole hog and implant IR transmitters and make the little blighters have to sign in to school by pointing the IR at an IR reciever which directs the browser to El Reg. Failure to do so gets them zapped.

Best get them servers upgraded for the rush ;p

Analysts ecstatic over AMD's $226m loss in Q3

$226m.....

Chips and bits and piles of..... well anyway... I'm a bit suspicious of that $226 million figure, try tapping it into your fave search engine and see how many results you get, and different ones too. Cynicism says it's a number just pulled out of the air.

As for all this well done pap, how the hell does losing that many millions equate to a well done? In a quarter too...3 months....sigh.

El Reg deploys (extra) comment icons

@Missing one.

They've provided for that already. You just don't have an icon. </smirk>

Orange puts plum back in mouth

Excuse you....

‘Orange puts plum back in mouth’

Honestly, I was a forces brat and was told quite regularly that I spoke like that. Utter pish. I hereby challenge all the Reg Hacks to pop a plum in their gobs and and say 'Your call is worth pap to us, we are currently getting pished in our local tavern' (without drooling all down your shirts). -That's- how you sound with a plum in your mouth!

Hackers hit back at iPhone update

You pays your money...

You takes your chances.

1: I have no sympathy to those who bought the thing day one and are now a bit peeved because the price went down a lot. Buying anything day one is merely a societal status purchase.

2: A shifty unlock or not, when buying the phone, people had to sign a contract. Remember those days when signing a contract actually stood for something? Nowadays it seems that if you complain like a 3 year old having a tantrum, you expect to get out of a contract just like that with no penalties.

3: I think Apple want a good kick up the backside off the edge of Beachyhead.

Would-be politician fails in Yahoo! and Ask.com lawsuit

Duh!

"The Court rejects plaintiff's contention in his opposition that Yahoo! Inc. is transformed into a state actor because it benefited from early public funding of the development of the internet," said US District Judge Richard Holwell.

See, he sued the wrong guys......maybe he should have sued (D)ARPA instead, after all, no 'NET, no problem. I'm surprised he didn't sue YouTube as well - 'They didn't make me popular wiv da masses, so they hampered my election chances, innit'

Ugh I shame myself.

So, what's the first rule of Reg Club?

First rule of Reg Club:

Thou shalt head straight to the comments and only return to read the article after thoroughly peeing thineself at the comments first.

Second rule:

Thou shalt spend 25 hours a day at El Reg, except on Fridays when thou shalt lay in the gutter whilst El Reg hacks step over your geeky body on the way to the nearest Inn.

Man sues God

He watched the re-run...

of Miracle on whatever street, obviously, that bit where 'Santa' gets off because America has 'In God we trust' on their dosh.

I say good for him, but it'll never fly, no matter the argument, you take on religion you're going to suffer.

Yahoo! In! Ninth! Circle! Of! Security! Hell!

AARRGGHHHH!!!

Aside from the seriousness of the article letting all those uneducated users of pc's, panic, could we (read you) stop with the exclamations after every word when it comes to something to do with Yahboo, please?

It's extraordinarily annoying to have William Shatner as Capt. Kirk style voice in your head whilst reading the headline.

I'm worried it will become such the norm that I'll be asking the fella 'do! you! want! a! drink! ?! or even worse, you'll infect PCW and new punters will hear things like 'The! Motherboard! needs! replacing! It! will! take! 6 weeks!, bad enough when said normally.

ugh!

Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill

@Re: Stupid question

"Well you see, there's this site called Wikipedia..."

Cheers for making me nearly spatter my coffee over the screen.....

Honestly....the humour never stops here at El Reg!

Left-handeders finally unlock the closet, researchers find

Only left handed people are in their right minds!

Try getting some left handed pens/pencils and watch the right-handed folks try to read the text on them....highly amusing. Or, get left-handed knives and watch the right-handers get frustrated because they can't cut a slice straight.

Left handed people adapt to the right handed world. Try learning reading guitar tabs when you're a lefty with a left handed guitar.....the world is upside down and back to front. pah!

Apple unveils larger nanos

@A "Forward" Step?

"Also, what is the point in paying for an iPhone ringtone when someone will crack the system within 30 days? Apple knows it will fail but apple stives on the "not so bright" people who will pay for things that should be free!"

Whether these things should be free or not, those people you call "not so bright" are at least honest. Besides, the money for R&D has to come from somewhere right?

Scotland launches electronics design centre

Love Glasgow.....But..

Glasgow has so much to offer, that's a given, and let's face it, a shed load of inventors, artists, architects etc, came/come from here and/or Scotland in general so something like this centre is to be applauded most vigorously.

I had to laugh at the: "The university says it will be at the forefront of breakthroughs in drug development, communications systems and homeland security", as it conjured up an image of a spotty teen shouting Eureka! down his newly designed 'ochaye fone' as he finally gets the latest recreational drug recipe right, then runs off to thwart all known and unknown threats to our 'Homeland' being the superhero type of course.

Cops cuff man for burning Burning Man man

@What is a Morissette a measure of?

How big the twig up your arse is, perhaps? Or how long you can talk in a slow drawl before people start snoring?

Paris Hilton dragged back into court

Unspecified Medical Blah.....

Much as I honestly hope that Ms. Hilton isn't seriously ill, this smacks of celebrity pampering and money being thrown about willy-nilly.

Plenty of inmates in the US and even over here get seriously ill, from acute depression to cancer and allsorts, yet they are not released and continue to serve their sentences.

Isn't a single cell on a celebrity wing enough concession as it is? C'mon girl....you broke the law, now take the punishment in good grace. I wonder if she'll adorn her ankle-tag with sparklies?

Researchers unpick Vista kernel protection

Yet again.....

Microsoft seems to have forgotten the golden rule....

If you build it, they will come.