* Posts by Harry the Bastard

243 publicly visible posts • joined 11 Feb 2008


Physicists believe they may have found fifth force of nature

Harry the Bastard

paywall on linked article

presumably it's this one on arxiv...


'Alien megastructure' Tabby's Star: Light is definitely dimming

Harry the Bastard

cat nap

obligatory text

Bees with numberplates will soon be buzzing around London. Why?

Harry the Bastard

bees with frickin' LASERs!!!

would be so much better

Lester Haines: RIP

Harry the Bastard

sad sad news

condolences to his family and friends

Virgin Media goes TITSUP* in South London due to painful piles

Harry the Bastard

loved the sample tweets


"@virginmedia Getting dangerously close to 24hrs with no service. Also dangerously close to me contacting Ofcom about lack of info/updates."

vm doesn't even put scheduled outages on its status pages/ivr system or make the front line helpdesk agents aware, the last one of those i experienced was announced as a few hours but actually lasted three days

vm broadband - great when it works; but when it doesn't, vm's lack of coordination, communication and basic care for its customers is clear to see

Apple quietly launches next-gen encrypted file system

Harry the Bastard


21st century - yep

case sensitive file system - nope

os x - wtf?

when i installed the very first version of os x on my tibook, it baffled me how apple could do something so stupid

they perpetuated the stupid for over a decade

that's either commit-mnt, or stupid

Q: Is it wrong to dress as a crusader for an England match?

Harry the Bastard

Re: en-ger-land, en-ger-land, en-ger-land!

would that be st. edmund of blackadder?

Swiss effectively disappear Alps: World's largest tunnel opens

Harry the Bastard

Re: There's got to be a joke here

and a spaghetti monster flies out

Android Pay may, er, pay... providing it gets over security hurdle

Harry the Bastard

ok, i'm a stick the mud

but the idea of sticking all my cards/id/tickets on a phone, of whatever brand, seems pointless

cards weigh c. 12g, fault tolerant, unaffected by impact/environmental conditions that'd damage/destroy most phones, don't need charging; lose one/all and you use your phone to report it, oh. and don't need a wallet, they work fine carried naked

phones weigh a lot more, need charging, easier to damage, clumsier to handle, tend to need protection against impact/extreme environment; forget to charge it, break it, or lose it and with no cards or you it's much more likely that you're screwed

Radiohead vid prompts Trumpton rumpus

Harry the Bastard

i'm waiting for the playmonaut version

where our intrepid hero makes an emergency landing near a small village

the locals seem friendly, at first...

Brit polar vessel christened RRS Sir David Attenborough

Harry the Bastard

Re: a triumph for commonsense

i'm happy to stand for the unpopular but right, over pandering to lowest common denominator mentality for the sake of popularity

the other route leads to things like donald trump and lynch mobs

oh, and i am a bastard

Harry the Bastard

a triumph for commonsense

over idiotic twattery

One black hole, three galaxies, four BEELION solar masses – found by accident

Harry the Bastard

solar masses?

i make it about 1768 billion yottacats

though it is quite early, so i may be mistaken

but either way it suggests the need for a few prefixes beyond yotta, perhaps an opportunity for el reg to lead the way?

Obama London visit prompts drone no-fly zone

Harry the Bastard

"any kite weighing not more than two kilograms"

ahhh, so over two kilograms is ok then

/assembles kilocat-equivalent kite

FBI Director defends iPhone 5C unlock tool that's obviously going to leak into wrong hands

Harry the Bastard

Re: Leakage?

q: will apple "accept full and absolute responsibility and for any damages incurred or ensued?" for shipping insecure product?

a: no

Taking an artsy selfie in Stockholm? You might need to pay royalities

Harry the Bastard


you really think it is correct that a newspaper or image or book on a news stand is no longer protected because it's in a public place? or a painting or photo that the artist has displayed in public? or source code?

the creator owns the rights, congratulations to the court for upholding those rights

minor/partial inclusion of a work visible in public is not the same as deliberate duplication for the sole purpose of distributing it for gain (of any kind), which is what wikimedia wants to do

wikimedia being non-profit does not mean it has the right to strip creator's of their rights in their own works

What's all this? Welcome to The Register's News Bytes

Harry the Bastard

Re: Can I switch them off as they mess up the front page layout....?


it brings out the luddite in me

Is iOS 9.3 Apple's worst ever update? First it bricks iThings, now Safari is busted

Harry the Bastard

Re: apple did release a range of plastic straps

oh bugger, in my defence i was half asleep when i posted that

Harry the Bastard

apple did release a range of plastic straps

surely this took development resources away from the new version of ios

otherwise the combined effort of these two activities, plus ejecting a new model of fondleslab, would be overwhelming

apple should reign in its ambitions, it's just pushing too hard

Feds look left and right for support – and see everyone backing Apple

Harry the Bastard

Re: Would amuse me that after all this fuss...

"The Chinese would have a copy of this tool within seconds of it compiling."

the chinese do make the iphone, they probably have it already

Facebook and Twitter back Apple's privacy stance

Harry the Bastard

Re: test it in court, and i hope apple loses

no, you are wrong

apple DOES have the key, this is a matter of fact, it is the key that signs the software update

this key enables signing of a crafted image that can then be used to auto update the device, this in turn will allow brute forcing the user's unlock code required to gain full access

btw apple was lying when it said there is no backdoor, there demonstrably is, this is it

only apple has the key to the backdoor, but it has it

apple lies

Harry the Bastard

test it in court, and i hope apple loses

if a court agrees that a private company has no obligation to comply with a warrant requesting that they help open a box to which they have the key, then that sets a precedent too

i.e. banks no longer need to provide info on money laundering - they have their clients' info, locked in a box to which they have the keys

we live in a civilised society, that requires compromise

the dramatic posturing by apple/others is pure pr guff

if all the wailing ninnies truly believe the fbi etc. has any interest in them at all, they have a seriously misplaced idea of their place in the world, i'm sure you could eliminate at least 99.9% of these delusional fanbois with no lasting impact on humanity beyond improving the gene pool

Official UN panel findings on embassy-squatter released. Assange: I'm 'vindicated'

Harry the Bastard


fact: he's not been found guilty, a court has to decide that, not internet experts, even el reg ones

fact: he's not even been charged with a crime in sweden, it's accusation, you'd think if there was evidence they'd have managed to charge him by now, funny that

fact: he's repeatedly offered to be questioned, which is all the swedes claim they want to do, but for some reason they decline, funny that

fact: he deeply pissed off the usa, uk and others when wikileaks spluffed snowden's blagged info to the world, after which the accusations were brought out to justify extradition, funny that

fact: whether these assange groupies, who by their own admissions chose to get into bed with him and in one case agreed they had consensual sex with him, were then assaulted as they claim, i do not know, but he's not accused of abducting, torturing or imprisoning them

fact: the usa, at the highest levels of government, approved the abduction, torture and detention without trial of many people, including british nationals, some of whom have after many years been released without production of any evidence that they were guilty of any crime

fact: cameron has been accused of porcine necrophilia and he's not sued for libel, funny that, but it doesn't make him guilty, personally i think it's nonsensical, but on the published information, the accusations against assange have exactly the same degree of corroboration, except, unlike cameron, assange claims innocence

the law needs to be consistent, everyone who is advocating extraditing assange without charge, when he has a plausible fear of then being handed over to another country with a proven track record of government approved abduction, torture and false imprisonment, needs to take a deep breath and think about the facts not the bullshit, and wonder why there is one law for assange and another for the rest

if he did assault these women, fine, nail him, but the way things are it does seem funny that the swedes haven't charged him, have proven to be uninterested in questioning him, and seek only to get him onto their territory from where he quite reasonably fears he may suddenly find himself usa bound and alone in the hands of proven torturers

Cisco's purple princesses gush workplace joy

Harry the Bastard


haven't worked for cisco, but worked with them 25+ years, always found the culture very open

Bats and badgers hold up Apple’s Irish data centre plans

Harry the Bastard

how about badger bacon?

is it better than the ham?

Cruz missile slams into DNS overlord ICANN over Chinese censorship

Harry the Bastard


...bears a striking resemblance to oswald danes


that can't be a good sign

Uni of Manchester IT director resigns after chopping 68 people

Harry the Bastard

his work there is done


always baffled me how serial screw-ups go from one highly-paid position to another, leaving devastation in their wake

Group rattles tin in bid to snatch TfL licence from Uber's paw

Harry the Bastard

Re: world moves on

black cabs certainly need to modernize

but in london traffic, with added roadworks, marches, accidents, state events etc., i'll take a cabby that knows what they're doing over some part timer with a gps any day

Self-regulation can address issues that arise in the digital economy, says Airbnb

Harry the Bastard

whiny hipsters plead for special treatment

strange how their desire to 'share', doesn't involve sharing the legitimate regulation, oversight and taxation of the old-fashioned businesses they compete with

whilst they're not perfect, i've never experienced surprise bum-rape or imprisonment by the people of slh, hilton, ihg, marriott, sheraton etc., not sure the same can be said of some airbnb customers

Stephen Hawking reckons he's cracked the black hole paradox

Harry the Bastard
Black Helicopters

it's clearly cats

the only question is, why are they denying it

Help! What does 'personal conduct unrelated to operations or financials' mean?

Harry the Bastard

poll theft?

/required body

BlackBerry axes BBM Meetings a year after launching it

Harry the Bastard

Re: You are right

no, blackberry is nothing like android, the leading mobile os on the planet

Apple's design 'drives up support costs, makes gadgets harder to use'

Harry the Bastard

with apologies to douglas adams

‘it’s the wild colour scheme that freaks me out,’ saidzaphod, whose love affair with the ship had lasted almost three minutes into the flight. 'every time you try and operate these weird white controls that are labeled in white on a white background, a little white light lights up in white to let you know you’ve done it.’

Get ready to register your drones in the US – or else

Harry the Bastard

they've not thought this one through...

...just equip your drone with a gun and invoke the second amendment

drone registration would be no less than gun registration, which of course is totally unacceptable, call out the nra, march on washington, lynch that african muslim guy, etc.

job done, stand by for strafing

Playmobil cops broadside for 'racist' pirate slave

Harry the Bastard

avast, lubbers ahoy!


Vulture-branded LYCRA can be yours, if you're feeling charitable

Harry the Bastard

"PS Those funny keys on your keyboard with the up arrows and possibly the word "shift" on them? Give them a go sometime - they're not just for decoration."


Terror in the Chernobyl dead zone: Life - of a wild kind - burgeons

Harry the Bastard


a) if you remove the humans who were scaring/neutering/killing it, the wild stuff does better

b) typically short lived (wrt humans) animals die of other causes before the effects of lower level radiation get to them

c) bears shit in woods

Woman makes app that lets people rate and review you, Yelp-style. Now SHE'S upset people are 'reviewing' her

Harry the Bastard

generally i don't like to see businesses fail

it's sad to see people who were trying to build something get hurt

but in this case i feel i have to make an exception

i do hope all the exploitative, money grubbing, race to the bottom, scum sucking, shit for brains, twats who thought creating and funding this invitation to abuse was a good idea, lose every penny

then i'd like them to slip in the street and land in a large steaming turd, not be injured, but as they lay reeking, get pissed on by people passing by who mistake the steam for smoke and are therefore being positive in their output

Overheating iPhone 6S+ BLINDED my cam, cries flashgate fanboy

Harry the Bastard



Apple CEO: We've hoovered up your cash faster than ever before

Harry the Bastard

always amuses me...

...when companies brag about how they use aerospace or military specification/standard parts or materials

if an aerospace/military standard specifies appalling crap, because that's all that's required, then it's appalling crap

NASA announcement of MAJOR MARS DISCOVERY imminent: WHAT can it be?

Harry the Bastard

no option for provocatively moist aliens?

...bearing a striking resemblance to anne francis* in forbidden planet, on a mission to teach us their advanced techniques of interspecies lurve and general happiness

*leslie nielsens and other alternate moist aliens are also available as required etc.

Will IT support please come to the ward immediately. Weeeee have a tricky problem

Harry the Bastard

in ye olde days

i remember people in the repair centre putting any dirty keyboard assembly under the tap and giving it a good scrub, the operators couldn't be bothered to clean them so they would put in a fault call to get a clean one

another sight that remains with me was a processor board that according to the ticket had somehow been inundated in cream, by the time it reached repair it had become a new blue cheese

i was so happy to move to r&d where the biohazard risk was lower

NEW ERA for HUMANITY? NASA says something 'major' FOUND ON MARS

Harry the Bastard

let me be the first to say that

i, for one, welcome our new martian overlords

Global productivity explodes as Facebook's service takes a dive

Harry the Bastard

what's facebook?

obligatory body text

PETA monkey selfie lawsuit threatens wildlife photography, warns snapper at heart of row

Harry the Bastard

Re: when will this madness stop?

"This case is a little more complicated than that of a normal picture of nature."

er, no, otherwise you can make the argument that, for instance, jackson pollock doesn't have copyright in paintings because he didn't have control of what the paint did, it was all down to fluid dynamics

or, no copyright exists in any photographic image because it is based on detection of photons, which any fule kno are non-deterministic, so any photograph is simply the result of random chance


of course the photographer had involvement and is responsible for the existence of the image: the camera was his property, he took it there, hr dropped it, like jp's paint it was then outside his control, and as a result of this uncontrolled action an image was captured, he then made a deliberate decision to retain the image and cause it to be transferred and published, it's his

UK.gov wants a cloud wizard at £1,000 a DAY. That's more than the prime minister's salary

Harry the Bastard

Re: £1000

"And yet it will still end up being filled by someone with a resume full of lies and no ability to prevent all the politics that will derail any project he is tasked with."

that was going to be my strategy: blag it, new laptop, big monitors on desk, comfy chair, enjoy life, a few fact finding missions somewhere warm and sunny, rake in the cash as fast as possible until it's obvious even to uk.gov that things may, just possibly, be a smidge overdue, exit with a golden handshake for personal reasons as the price of not rocking the boat, then with reputation and cv enhanced, automatically be shortlisted for the next one on an even bigger package

Apple muscles in on biz world AGAIN – this time with Cisco pact

Harry the Bastard

Re: Desk phones?

on those awful days when you have to endure 6+ hours of webex, a desk phone with a proper headset is an awful lot more comfy than a mobile, and as our global megacorp is run by bean counters who confused byod with "buy your own phone, pay for company calls yourself and you cannot expense them", i'm buggered if i'm paying for the experience myself

mine has mute button, can't ever recall using one that didn't, and i have the speed dials set the way i like, much faster than faffing around with a mobile that's had the corporate security policy inflicted on it so that it locks after 30 seconds inactivity

the only improvement would be ditch the ip telephony and get back to a nice old definity where voice quality starts high and stays that way no matter how many people are on the phone at the same time

The good burghers of Palo Alto are entirely insane

Harry the Bastard

seems clear

kill the golfers

/with apologies to philip k dick

Full duplex! Bristol boffins demo Tx and Rx on the same frequency AT THE SAME TIME

Harry the Bastard

"...lightweight parts of the industry gets into spats about rounded corners and hysteresis on scrolling, the serious radio guys seem to be good at accommodating optimal solutions"

one of the many differences between hipster fashionistas and hardcore engineers

ANIMALS being CUT UP to make Apple Watch straps

Harry the Bastard

The Register has contacted Apple, but a representative has so far refused to talk to us

that's because their representatives are busy gorging on aligator burger sprinkled with shaved shark and a side serving of ostrich mini-kievs