Posts by Darren B

Microsoft's idea of Family Protection? Block Google

FSF?

more like FFS!

Street View ghost spooks Cardiff medium

Mary Bleedin' Poppins

Well I am no expert but that is clearly Mary Poppins, I assume she either flew in on her umbrella or the rift in Tiget Bay is active again and Captain Jack is ready to do battle with Dick Van Dyke now sporting a welsh accent.

Google juices in-photo ads biz

Great

Yet more shit hover over crap to pop up on my screen as I am scrolling down a page using my wheel.

I can see this tech heading into things like Picassa Online Album and assigning sales ads to people personal pictures.

i.e. Look at picture of friend in Armani Jeans, hover over jeans and get ads for £2.99 jeans from Tesco.

Ryanair may charge cattle to use the bog

So it will be 2 pounds...

...to join the mile high club?

UK to rely on mobile operators for universal broadband

Can't see it getting to 100% of the population

Looking at how crap 3G signal is in my house to my phone, I am not convinced.

If 3 are left in charge then it will Broadband black out.

Are iPhone users just tight?

As a Symbian User

My biggest complaint is that the software is too frigging expensive especially when 1-2 years later I change phone and have to buy it all again. I think people expect to pay £20+ for software on a big box PC but not on an iddy biddy phone. It is all in the mind and my price point for a Phone App is up to £5, but for a fiver i expect it to do miracles.

Mobile phones will 'cut off' Al Qaeda

Won't somebody think of the children!

My 2 year old does not have or need a mobile phone but apparently needs a seat so will therefore need a boarding pass.

Great holiday that will be, "now sweetie, Mummy and Daddy are off to florida to see Buzz Lightyear but you will have to stay with Nanny and Grandad as mean old Uncle Sam says you are a terrorist."

AVG slaps Trojan label on core Windows file

I have always found

that online forums/updates are especially useful when your PC is in a continuous reboot cycle, or even fails to boot completely.

Sun Java piggybacks Microsoft searchbar, divorces Google

Why do we need these toolbars anymore?

Erm, don't most "latest version" browsers have the functions these provide built in? I am sure most punters running JRE will be upto date with their Firefox/Opera/IE* delete as appropriate.

Motorola embraces Android, sees Microsoft on the side

Symbian Foundation?

So Motorola are going top cut ties with Symbian Foundation already? That must be a new record for them.

Plymouth nurse punted panties on eBay

IT probed her inbox

Was this so they didn't have pay the £25 for the pre probed ones? Nice to see them saving tax payers money.

Paris because I am sure she is happy to have her inbox probed.

Sony Ericsson Xperia X1 Windows Mobile smartphone

AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHH!

Why does every fucking touch screen phone have to be compared to the fucking iPhone. There were touch screen phones around before the iPhone and there will be touch screen phone around after the iPhone.

Try being orginal and compare the devices in their market sector rather than the current must have toy.

Deloitte loses hundreds of thousands of pension details

How big was the Handbag?

And to have enough spare room for a laptop!

Superfluid leak downs LHC for months

With all that helium warming up nicley

Will the boffins be talking like Chip 'n Dale?

Electric Mini spied in Munich

Hybrid = Dual Fuel?

Or am I wrong? Don't most Hybrids have some form of fossel fuel to help them along?

Slimline Xbox 360 to be named the Pure?

How about lean as in

it is a bit lean on features.

US wireless pioneer to carriers: Don't be European

I suppose

It's one way to keep Motorola going

Today is not Hadron Collider Day

So Stephen Hawkins wins his bet!

He must be laughing at us all as we speak. He's a wag that one, had me convinced.

The Hadron Collider: What's it all about, then?

The Hadron Collinder

That thing will take a lot of Brocolli.

Am I the only one who keeps misreading it as Collinder?

BlackBerry, HTC eat into Nokia Q2 market share

American market see bigest increase

And, historically, Americans like to buy HTC (WinMo) & Blackberry. Also the iPhone will have taken a bite of Nokia's share globally too from the consumer side of things.

To me these figures are not saying much, just that the Americans are finally waking up to the real world.

Nokia plays MobileMeToo

One mans slick

is another mans clunky.

How to stop worrying and enjoy paying for incoming calls

What about Same network calls?

I assume there is no termination fee on (say) 02 to 02 calls? Oh of course, more chance to do us out of our valuable minutes.

If this means cheaper calls then it should mean more minutes too. Though I am sure the networks will worm out of this one.

And who pays termination fees when it goes from 02 to BT Landline?

7-year-old faces M&S Inquisition

Why is a 7 year old confirming details?

Why did they already have his identity on their systems? Isn't this where the DPA comes in protection of data held, not on data gathering. They do need his consent to send him marketing but not to talk to him or his representative.

This seems a little bit odd.

Now Hollywood is chasing UK downloaders

Doesn't suprise me with Tiscalli

Couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery

My sister left them to go to Sky and they continued to charge her, when she asked for it back, instead of getting her money back Tiscalli called the Bailiffs in to collect the money they had already collected.

To this day she still does not have the money although the hounds are no longer involved. It actually took my sister to send the Bailiffs the letters to get them to go away. Being nice bailiffs they didn't say anymore or apologise for their lord and masters mistake.

Electoral officers oppose edited register

Why waste time selling it

When it will be mislaid on a USB Stick/CD/DVD/Other Removable media* at some point.

*delete as appropriate

Mines the one with the boxs of new DVD-R's in the pockets.

Enterprise class mobility

How confusing

Shirley the E71 is as "viable [an] alternative to Blackberry and Windows Mobile devices" as the iPhone. Infact as the E series is designed for enterprise, compared to the consumer iPhone it would seem to be far more viable.

And then he disguards both platforms (Symbian/Apple) as being in "Front Ends" for Exchange so is making a play for Blackberry/RIM vs Windows Mobile/Exchange.

WTF mention the iPhone (or even breifly E71) in the first place.

Oh and doesn't Symbian have Blackberry connect (and I would expect Applt to have it too at some point)? Wouldn't this make a platform more compelling being able to connect to any solution rather than the single connection solutions from Microsoft Phones and RIM Phones?

Samsung SGH-F400 music phone

OH FFS

Now the yoofs no longer have to sit on the train with thier tinny speakers competing in some sort of choon sound off. They can whip out thier B&O Samsungs and piss off all those tired commuters that litle bit more.

Boris boots Transys off Oyster contract

I have a paper ticket (I am from outside the big smoke)

and the bastard gates still manage to wipe it out. I only had the latest one for 2 days. According the the ticket office I changed it at they are getting hundreds per week with the same problem, it is all down to the software used for the gates.

Crap system that slows me down even more. What was wrong with paper tickets again?

Net shoppers bullied into being Verified by Visa

@chip and pin NOT mandatory

Someone tell M&S Money that, they rejected a credit card payment in Wagamama's due to lack of C'n'P machines. When they called later to check on the use of the card they confirmed that they reject all payments made through non-C'n'P payment machines in case of fraud.

Killer Satnavs amok in 'Utah Polyhedron' phenomenon

Jumping up and down

in cars hanging over the edge? Sounds a bit risky to me.

Window-licking Belgians sounds so much better than Windscreen-licking Belgians.

Congestion charge means less traffic, more congestion

Longer buses = Longer wait

If they got rid of the bendy buses then the distance to the front of the queue would be shorter, hence more traffic can get through each light phase.

Too much money? Bling your iPhone with the $1000 app

@simon

Where are you getting your beer from? I want in.

Free for all on London Underground

@ac - refunds

Train operators stopped auto refunds to season ticket holders years ago, actually about the time of privatisation. At one time they would extend tickets based on past performance. Now they increase the price based on past performance.

Bad year = Above Inflation Rise

Good Year = Mega Above Inflation Rise.

It's official: Samsung shows off i8510 8mp cameraphone

Apparently it is S60

(see All About Symbian)

That will upset so of the Oooooo that's nice people.

Japan kicks off electric car format war

Don't let S**y make the batteries

Could me meltdown on the M4.

Apple swipes £121 for 'free' MobileMe trial

Apple, the new 419ers?

These 419ers are getting smarter, Was there a promise of millions if you signed up for the service? Using card services to scam the money, genius!

US retailers start pushing $20 Ubuntu

$20 for 60 Days support

Thats a touch steep, or an I missing something. Maybe $20 for 1 years support?

Can T-Mobile get an Android onto US market in '08?

So basically Android v1 = iPhone v1 + 3G

So the septics will lap it up then (assuming google beat the drum hard enough).

Palm, BlackBerry-beating demand for 3G iPhone claims researcher

Consumers in marketing driven choice shocker!!!

Advertise the fuck out of it and the punters will come.

Judge grants Viacom 12TB of YouTube user records

What I don't get

Are Viacom going after the Uploaders, Watchers or Just Google.

If I watched a video (not a full programme/episode) not knowing it contained footage from a Viacom programme would I be liable for paying to watch it?

This could open up a massive can of worms regarding the watching/listening of any copyrighted material whether intentional or not. How do you prove that you have intentionally streamed the video/music. With embedded vids and music on sites it is almost impossible to avoid.

Swedish customs pull Frenchman with two asses

Now

If he had shared the dingy with the drunk bloke they could have ensured that both made it across and could have avoided customs totally.

Flying cars on the horizon, says Clive Sinclair

Permission to use of "bullseye"?

Watch out the RAF will be slapping a lawsuit on your ass.

King Arthur was English 'propaganda', French claim

Why are spokespeople nearly always aptly named

So in this corner of France we have Ms Toulouse, the other day on the TV there was a feature about allotments and they spoke to a Mr Onions.

Cambridge congestion charge plans shelved

Problems with Cambridge

As an non-Cambridgeite who has both commuted (Science park.Milton) and shopped in Cambridge I have both driven and used the trains.

1. Park & Ride, great idea except a car with 1 passenger is cheaper to park than a family/full car of 4/5. It is cheaper to park in Cambridge if you are travelling as a group in one car. (though this is true of most P&R schemes)

2. Train station - is a good distance from the town and the buses are quite frankly crap, in most cases get a bus to the central bus station then get a bus from there to your destination.

3. Girton Interchange - this is one of the worst thought out junctions in the UK. If the A14 at Bar Hill is bloked it f*cks up the entire network in all directions - North (A14), South (M11) East (A14),West(A428) and and is quicker to travel round the ring road/through the centre.

4. Good train links from London & Peterbrough but what about those of us who are close enough in Bedfordshire/North Herts to use Cambridge as a social centre/work place but are between Hitchin & Peterborough. (ok a personal gripe)

5. Increased housing in the vicinity (Cambourne etc) but no compeliing reason to use Cambridge.

Sort out the infrastructure and you might get people interested.

Europe acts on mobile charges

Pay-to-Receive!

Bye-Bye-Mobile-Communication-Device! Hello-Life!

Bloke crams 13 into Volvo S70

Silly idiot

A V70 would have been much more sensible. Could have fitted a few more in I reckon.

London hospital loses 20,000 unencrypted patient files

Filing cabinets for their purpose

To store data records, what is the problem here?

If they were full of paper then they could still have been stolen, the obvious difference is it would have taken a lorry and 4 blokes rather than a man and a holdall on a push bike.

China in anti-monopoly investigation of Microsoft

"other software developed by multinational companies"

Shirley Adobe must be on the list.

And since when did M$ bundle Office and Windows except with a new PC? Or is it just in good ol blighty we need to buy all our licences seperatley?

Thief swipes cabinet minister's laptop from Salford office

Right lets just open up all this data

there is no point in making it secret if the tw*ts can't keep it secret. If it was open information then no one would bother looking at it as it would not be worth looking at as everyone would know what it contains and there would be no advantage to anyone.

Look, if everyones CC details, DOB, Bank, Address etc was openly available what would be the point in identity fraud, we would all be able to defraud the fraudsters and the value of the information would be 0.

While we are at it lets get rid of money, and shops, and 'pooters and t'internet.

Right I am off to live in Brazil in the Mountains close to Peru and shoot arrows from my trusty bow at unmanned drone aircraft.

Now shall I paint myself red, blue yellow, orange, green or purple?

Mine is the tin of body paint by the radiator.

T-Mobile points to cut-price PAYG 3G iPhone

"£134 - about £100 less than the £269"

Or UNDER Half price even. I could easily work in marketing.