* Posts by Christopher Lane

112 publicly visible posts • joined 24 Jan 2008


A memo from the distant future... June 2022: The boss decides working from home isn't the new normal after all

Christopher Lane
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Re: Real life

...yes, but at home, I can choose to mix with the cat, the wife, my mate or whoever else...In the office I 'have' to mix with - urgh - "Team Members"...

After 30 years of searching, astroboffins finally detect the universe's 'missing matter' – using fast radio bursts

Christopher Lane

...but does it really "matter" given the state of Humanity?

How can one set of Humans conduct science like this but another fall for this --> https://www.theregister.co.uk/2020/05/28/anti_5g_usb_stick/.

Let us hope the former out number the latter else Humanity will be extinct within 100 years.

The point of containers is they aren't VMs, yet Microsoft licenses SQL Server in containers as if they were VMs

Christopher Lane

What next...?

...I buy a car and it's price is flexed depending if only I -OR- or me AND the missus drive it?

Boffins find proof that yes, Carl Sagan and Joni Mitchell were right, we really are all made up of star stuff

Christopher Lane

My God...

...I'm full of stars!

Look, we know it feels like everything's going off the rails right now, but think positive: The proton has a new radius

Christopher Lane

So it's not only Wagon Wheels...

...getting smaller as I get older! (for non-UK readers -->http://www.burtonsbiscuits.com/our-brands/wagon-wheels/)

Side-splitting bulging batts, borked Wi-Fi... So, how's that Surface slab working out for you?

Christopher Lane

Nearly Unrepairable...

...but not quite. I changed a battery on our FD's Surface Pro a few weeks ago. It wasn't all smooth sailing and did involve "creating" a Wi-Fi aerial from copper tape. What's more curious is that the Wi-Fi has better range, speed, throughput etc with my scapel-crafted bodge than the original I inadvertantly/couldn't help slashing through...go figure!

Get ready for a literal waiting list for European IPv4 addresses. And no jumping the line

Christopher Lane

Untill Mainstream ISP's...

...(in the UK at least) offer IPv6, I think we are all stuck with 6-to-4 and all that business. It goes away if it's IPv6 all the way down (to the very bottom turtle).


Christopher Lane
Big Brother

Re: Always amuses me ...

Oh God, I can imagine it now...

"Ja, ja, ich bin in der Londoner U-Bahn!"

How's the drunk in the corner gonna get any sleep now!

Users fail to squeak through basic computer skills test. Well, it was the '90s

Christopher Lane

Re: Not sure...

I can beat that - two days ago. HP laptop + Coffee + three sugars + ...wait for it... + the coffee was made with condensed milk.

Unbelievably only the keyboard was goosed; that pure sugary goodness was too thick to get in to anything important. £22 later (and a lot of cursing and chiseling to remove the now firmly welded keyboard) and all is good.

Ah so many stories from our various building sites that I could regale you all with...

Don’t fight automation software for control, just turn it off. FAST

Christopher Lane

The old adage...

fly the damn plane! Otherwise {see right}--->

It's been 50 years since those damn dirty apes took the planet by storm

Christopher Lane

I always found...

...First Born a little disturbing. A little too much interest in our DNA cousins.


User thanked IT department for fast new server, but it had never left its box

Christopher Lane

Problem types - There's only three...

A Hardware Problem...

A Software Problem...

and A "Fleshware" Problem...as previously stated, usually somewhere between the keyboard and the back of the chair.

CrashPlan crashes out of cloudy consumer backup caper

Christopher Lane

Re: No mention of Family plan...

+ 1 for Arq Backup & Amazon Cloud Drive

Having said that Amazon Cloud Drive isn't unlimited any more --> https://techcrunch.com/2017/06/08/amazon-ends-its-unlimited-cloud-storage-plan/

The Internet of Flying Thing: Reg man returns with explicit shots

Christopher Lane

As Python would say...

..."You luck Bastard. You, lucky, lucky Bastard!"

Julian Assange wins at hide-and-seek game against Sweden

Christopher Lane

Does anybody else find it strange...

...that the Swedes drops the charges two days after Chelsea Manning is released?

Why Microsoft's Windows game plan makes us WannaCry

Christopher Lane

Hang on another minute...

Microsoft have a bit of a cheek saying people should install patches more quickly. I hold my breath every time I roll out a patch Tuesday mother load just in case one of the patches breaks something else! They kind of have a bit of a record there. No wonder people are reticent to do so until it's proven to be sound, though March to May is little long, it's a defensive mind set which becomes a habit.

Riddle me this: What's green and freezes cloudy penguins?

Christopher Lane

They've also released...

...a Microsoft Office 365 exchange backup product which is very "Veeamy" and, as one would expect from Veeam, works without any dramas.

Very useful when your MD realises he needs that mail from "Restore Deleted Items" limit +1 day ago etc etc.

Nest Cam: A compelling piece of hardware-software

Christopher Lane

I also wondered about the cable. I personally would bring the cable inside to an internal socket so at least the little sods couldn't snip it! Except the 3m of camera attached cable is terminated with a ruddy great connector so you'd need a big hole instead of a nice cable sized hole finished with a plastic plug.

I also agree with the comments above re criminals covering their face. However if plod have anything about them they would canvas the local area to see if any near or distant neighbours have CCTV that may have caught an image of the would be swag-wrangler making his way to and from the crime scene and match the trackie/shell suit etc.

PS Sorry all for the double post earlier...bloody IE!!!

Christopher Lane

What would be really nice...

...is this kind of hardware/software experience but the ability to point it at cloud storage you already ̶o̶w̶n̶ rent i.e. iCloud, Amazon, OneDrive etc. I suppose that's where they make their money, subscriptions et al.

On a slightly unrelated note (to this particular device), I never quite "get" the local storage thing for security devices either. If the criminals are brazen enough to break in to your house then going the "extra mile" and nicking the NVR or NAS etc is nothing to them. Once the footage is gone forever, the nice shiny camera is as useful as a damp sock. Sure you could bolt the box down, shield it in 1/4 steel plating and position gun turrets around it but I'd gladly just pay another £100 for the device and it allow me the option to point to cloud storage I already subscribe to. Another option is for the manufacturer to add £50 to the price of the device and charge £1 a month to "turn on" the feature there by saving them Lord only knows how much on data centres, storage, cooling, backups etc etc.

I await the inevitable down votes.

Christopher Lane

What would be really nice...

...is this kind of hardware/software experience but the ability to point it at storage you own i.e. iCloud, Amazon, OneDrive, local NAS etc. I suppose that's where they make their money, subscriptions et al.

Exploding phablet phears phorce Samsung Galaxy Note 7 delay

Christopher Lane
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Re: If you want to prevent this..

"receptacles the size of a hamster's anus"

ROFL! Ah....that's set me up for the rest of the day {wipes a way a tear of laughter}

Lester Haines: RIP

Christopher Lane

Re: All though this will be lost...

I feel a black page topper rather than the usual red is in order for a few days...

Christopher Lane

All though this will be lost...

...in a tsunami of comments, I want it recorded that, for a man of so many eloquent words, I am unable to find any adequate enough to reflect his true brilliance. My thoughts go to the family and friends of a damn fine journalist who has left us far too early.

Astroboffins' discovery gives search for early life a left hand. Or right

Christopher Lane

Re: Enantiomers (mirror image copies of a chiral molecule)

That being the case why aren't all diet food stuffs made with left handed sugar...all the sweetness but none of the sin (or aspartame created cancer or sorbitol bottom burps)!

It's [insert month] of 2016, and your Windows PC can still be owned by [insert document type]

Christopher Lane

Re: The obligatory question

Bless him, still going after these years and providing useful stuff.


Tried it, used it. It works by creating/setting two keys in your registry.

All credit to Mr Gibson, the following is paraphrased from his site.


Under this key, the 32-bit DWORD value “DisableGwx” is set to 1.

When DisableGwx is set to 1, the upgrade offer icon is suppressed.


Under this key, the 32-bit DWORD value “DisableOSUpgrade” is set to 1.

When DisableOSUpgrade is set to 1, any previously downloaded Windows 10 files are deleted and Windows will never attempt to upgrade the current operating system.

Half of Brit small biz hit by cyber crime. 10% spend zilch on infosec

Christopher Lane

"SMEs need to realise that they’re a target of DDoS, hacking and malware attacks just like bigger firms."

Unfortunately SME's don't have the big bucks like the bigger firms. Either the bucks for large(r) highly skilled IT teams or top end AV (if it's even worth it these days). And then there is the UTM's and the inevitable license/subscription attached to both which pushes the cost per "meat-in-a-seat" higher and higher.

Judge slams BT for blaming engineer after 7 metre ceiling plunge

Christopher Lane

Gives a whole new meaning...

...to drop cables...

Uber helicopter taxis

Christopher Lane

Just don't raise your hand to high...

...when you hail it and it pulls up next to you...

The Microsoft-LinkedIn hookup will be the END of DAYS, I tell you

Christopher Lane

So glad I deleted my account a year ago too TBH.

Is it my imagination or is that a MacOS wall paper behind the Cortana graphic?

I spy with my little fibre, ten million or so galaxies

Christopher Lane

And as the last galaxy was counted...

...Overhead, without any fuss, the s̶t̶a̶r̶s̶ galaxies were going out.

Apple launches HomeKit app – but where are the products?

Christopher Lane



Boffins: There's a ninth planet out there – now we just need to find it

Christopher Lane

My choice of name...


About time we had a bit of Norse mythology.

EE, O2, Giffgaff, BT Mobile customers cut off as mobile networks fail

Christopher Lane

Emergency Infrastructure

I think I am correct in saying that EE provide the emergency infrastructure in terms of comms., to the British Government so the fact they could be felled so easily is a tad worrying...

Lenov-lol, a load of Tosh, and what the Dell? More bad holes found in PC makers' bloatware

Christopher Lane

Person in the street...

The other thing to be noted here is our "Geek Status" (I generalise but you know what I mean).

I 100% agree with previous comments about wiping the machine and rebuilding. However Joe/Josephine Public go to Dell's site to download these "driver thingies" after wiping their machine and are presented with "Enter a Service Tag" or...hang...this looks easier..."Auto-detect your product". This promptly downloads the Dell System Detect and they (thinking they have done the right thing) open the machine up again to all and sundry. Substitute Dell with another manufacturer of your choosing, I happen to work with Dells at my place.

As "Geeks" we know this about kind of thing but poor ol' Joe/Josephine believe they've done the right thing. The true question here is where is the boundary between user education (they should know this stuff) and Corporate responsibility (THE MAN shouldn't do this stuff).

Reg reader achieves bronze badge, goes directly to jail

Christopher Lane

Like I'm worried...it's a bootnotes article. Now were it a serious piece of journalism about Crypto4/SAN all flash arrays/Net neutrality etc I could understand the "humour removed at birth" individual above. However I shall accept my downvotes with joy, join them together in a daisy chain about my head and poke a flower down each of your barrels...peace out brothers and sisters!

Christopher Lane

oooooo hark at you...someones had a humour bypass ;-)

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iPad data entry errors caused plane to strike runway during takeoff

Christopher Lane

Re: Using toys as tools...


Completely off IT topic but as a pilot maybe you can explain something to me.

The article states the aircraft had lighter than reality weight entries and hotter than reality engines temperatures. Would the aircraft not have been more sluggish i.e. heavier and engines running less thrust? Why would the noise pitch up, wouldn't the angle of ascent been lower than usual...not higher?

In case you haven't guessed a wanna be pilot typing this but at 45 I'm to old, fat and baldness would probably preclude me too.

Cryptowall 4.0: Update makes world's worst ransomware worse still

Christopher Lane

Straw poll...

On more constructive note...how do you guard your business against this threat, FSRM File screens, SRP/Whitelisting etc? Votes/comments please...

RBS promises 'safe, secure, confidential' info-sharing on Facebook at Work

Christopher Lane

Oh...what could go wrong...

'Nuff said...