* Posts by Johnny G

52 publicly visible posts • joined 22 Jan 2008


BBC detector vans are back to spy on your home Wi-Fi – if you can believe it

Johnny G

Court evidence

Surely the ambiguity over the apparent "secret technology" will (and would have in the past) have to be reviled the first time a conviction is challenged in court. The prosecution would have to produce the evidence to prove someone was watching TV or iPlayer etc.

Pitchfork-wielding villagers hunt hairy shapeshifters in One Night Ultimate Werewolf

Johnny G

Young Frankenstein

Igor: Werewolf!

Dr. Frankenstein: Werewolf?

Igor: There.

Dr. Frankenstein: What?

Igor: There, wolf. There, castle.

Dr. Frankenstein: Why are you talking that way?

Igor: I thought you wanted to.

Makes me laugh every time I hear werewolf mentioned. Thank you Mel Brooks.

On the matter of shooting down Amazon delivery drones with shotguns

Johnny G

Re: Weapons

You’re missing the point. To clarify…

Of course “anything” can be used as a weapon, but in the case of a pistol club, the .22 is NOT being used as one.

I’m pro-firearms. By describing it as a “weapon” you are giving the left-wing “anti” brigade something to get their teeth into and all you are doing is encouraging negative press about a perfectly great sport.

Johnny G


"Member of the pistol club at university, mostly shooting .22 target weapons "

Please don't use the word "weapons" in this context. It is not a weapon, it's a piece of sporting equipment. Saying something like that is discrediting to you.

Classic telly FX tech: How the Tardis flew before the CGI era

Johnny G

Dodgy imagery

I think some of those techniques are still being used by the North Korean propaganda team

Gourmet chemists sniff out ultimate cheese on toast

Johnny G

Re: Keep it simple


Fair enough, white it is. ;-)

Johnny G
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Re: Definitions

The French call it a croque-monsieur, although that also involves ham.

I think in America they call it "Cheese toast", missing the "on" for some reason.... reminded me of this travesty: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plCNjB_IIo0

Any other local/worldwide definitions out there??

Johnny G
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Keep it simple

White or wholemeal bread, square/rectangular in shape. Shape is important because it makes coverage with rectangular cheese slices easier.

Toast BOTH sides

Apply strong cheddar, ensuring as much coverage of the toast as possible, else exposed areas start to burn

Place under a very hot grill until the cheese is just starting to brown. Also recommend some tin foil under the grill tray to catch the inevitable meltage.

Apply ketup, but only one slice at a time (assuming you're having 2 slices!), i.e. just before you intend to eat it as the cold ketchup tends to cool the hot cheese and makes it rubbery.

Also good with chopped up chives lightly sprinkled.

Three's mobile data goes titsup in mysterious spreading outage

Johnny G

Up and down

Marylebone, London: Finally connected late morning. Web browsing speed was good, excellent in fact, but time & date services didn't seem to be working and my Gmail client couldn't connect to google to download email. My phone thinks it's 6th January 1980.

Connection went off again at about 5pm.

It was actually quite nice not having the distraction of the internet on my train to work. Anyway, it's a beautiful day outside and I want beer, not my phone.

Intel: Haswell is biggest 'generational leap' we have EVER DONE

Johnny G

Re: 2-in-1 WTF?


That is all.

Reg readers brew up the ultimate cuppa

Johnny G

Brewing time

"Brewing time: 3-4 minutes".

Way too long. If you're using a regular tea bag (such as PT, Tetley or my fav Twinings Everyday) and BOILING water (a must), it only needs about 30 secs, maybe less. 3 or 4 mins we stew it.

To me the most critical component in this is the water temperature. It should be at boiling or very near boiling. Warm water just won't brew the tea properly and will make it smell.

We don’t talk any more... on the commute

Johnny G
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Nicely put

My 20 mins on a ridiculously packed South West Train to Waterloo has always been the same - no one talks to each other and that was the case long before Smartphones, ipads, etc. Occasionally you get some t***t who doesn't mind the entire carriage listening to his one-way phone conversation, but the majority of us are private individuals who value that time to ourselves, just thinking, reading, texting, day dreaming etc.

Ultimate bacon sarnie scrap starts to sizzle

Johnny G

Re: Farmhouse Granary Loaf/Bap

As Harry Callahan famously said, "Nobody, I mean NOBODY puts ketchup on a bacon sandwich."

Johnny G

Re: Farmhouse Granary Loaf/Bap

"then some ketchup"


HTC hawks fresh Desire for market boost

Johnny G

Coming to a cloud near you: dirty laundry

Johnny G

Re: My only question is "why?".

I would like to be able to control my oven remotely. I’d like to be able to switch it on before I get home, so that I don’t have to wait for it to get hot, or perhaps heat something up that I’d put in it that morning before leaving the house so it's ready when I arrive. I never really know when I’m going to leave work in the evening, so a simple timer isn’t really enough.

Three extends data use with Sim-only tariff tweak

Johnny G

Re: Limitations?

I'm on 3 on a non-OnePlan deal. If I teather my laptop or partner's iPod with their system immediately notices and switches me off. It's very annoying not being able to teather... the technology is out there.

Vauxhall Ampera hybrid e-car

Johnny G

Where will all the extra electricity come from?

If/when they do take off, how is the UK going to cope with the increased demand for electricity? They're STILL stumbling over nuclear power generation, which is clearly the only viable option currently

NASA found filming August's Mars landing in California desert

Johnny G

Overly complicated

No doubt that smarter people than me have worked it all out, but it does look like there's a lot to go wrong with that landing procedure....

If thrusters are really needed, why not mount then under the main rover? At least that would do away with the need for cables and winches etc.

I'll be impressed if it all works though!!

Pints under attack as Lord Howe demands metric-only UK

Johnny G

And another measurement for decimalisation

He should add music to his list... there should be 10 notes in a octave and 10 strings on a guitar

Atlantis computer goes down: Fixed by 'nauts

Johnny G

"Open the pod bay doors GPC4"

"I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that"

Fire-quenching electric forcefield backpack invented

Johnny G

What about the heat energy?

Assuming these "unknown" forces can extinguish a flame, the actual flame in a burning building is only half the problem. Hot gasses are what ignites other flammable objects. How would this pulse of electricity remove all that heat energy?

E.g. if you pointed this device at a Bunsen burner, it might knock out the flame. Gas would still be released. If you knocked out the flame on a red hot burning timber, the flame would almost instantly reignite becasue the temperature of the wood itself and surroundings.

Microsoft's past - the future to Android's iPhone victory

Johnny G

Key to Android's iPhone victory is developers...

I doubt it. More liekly to be good advertising, which Apple has done successfully.

Joe Public really doesn't care if there's 800 billion apps for either platform, all they care about is being cool and trendy and blindly absorbing the adverts. Suckers.

Flat-pack plug designer wins top award

Johnny G

He also wins....

... the Grubbiest Double Socket Award

'Health and safety killjoys' kill cheese-rolling race

Johnny G

Easy to blame H&S

"the event has become so popular that last year saw 15,000 spectators flock to the site, three times its capacity. Local roads were clogged with traffic "

This is nothing whatsoever to do with health and safety.

Epson models wearable PlayStation 3

Johnny G


What a tit!

Renault intros e-MPV

Johnny G
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Possibly the ugliest car I've ever seen. Why do electric cars have to look so crap?? Just make it look like a normal car FGS, even make it look like an existing model if you can't be arsed to design a new look!

Pig plague and Twitter: The terrifying truth

Johnny G

7 cases

At time of writting, it's killed 7 people according to the BBCs web site. Yes, that's 7, not the 150 you'd be forgiven for thinking.

I think The Metro has my fav stories about it. Classics like:

"A 12-year-old girl is one of three more people confirmed with swine flu in Britain today.

Her school has been closed as it emerged she had been in close contact with 50 fellow pupils. "

OMG!!!!!!!! That means ALL 50 of those kids will deffo be dead next week!!!!

Mexico? US? Just don't go there, warns EU health chief

Johnny G

But you're wrong...

"Spain has confirmed one case of swine flu in the east of the country, as the European Commissioner for Health warned against unnecessary travel to the countries at the centre of the outbreak."

That's not quite right though is it? Androulla Vassiliou says "Personally, I would try to avoid non-essential travel to the AREAS which are reported to be in the centre of the clusters, in order to minimise the personal risk and to reduce the potential risk to spread the infection to other people."

Areas, not countries. As Lester says in an article today, the virus is "currently making short work of journalistic common sense". Here here.

Grav-mapping satellite fires ion engines

Johnny G


Why do boffins have to describe their gadgets as "performing nominally", when what they really mean is "performing normally" or "as expected"??

Atlantis finally go for Hubble mission

Johnny G

Didn't know it was travelling across London

"the 3.4 mile journey from the Vehicle Assembly Building to the pad will take around six hours, NASA estimates"

I hope they remember to pay the congestion charge...

US Navy spends $12m on electric hypercannon

Johnny G

But who are they going to shoot at?

The "enemy" doesn't have ships or planes these days, the enemy lives in a 2 bedroom mid-terrace in Bradford now.

Sniper-aiding app arrives for iPhone

Johnny G

How it communicates??

Well, Bruce Willis had a phone that controlled to his weapon (ho hum) in Day of the Jackal

First-ever pics of lunar polar crater interiors released

Johnny G


I think their sat nav needs an update. Haworth is near Bradford

Nokia 6600 Slide 3G mobile phone

Johnny G
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nothing new

Wow - they have released yet another phone that it little or not idfferent to those released 2 years ago!

All the manufactures seem to have stalled - they haven't released anything new for at least 12 months.

419ers take Canadian for $150,000

Johnny G


what a fuckwit!!

Steve Jobs dismisses death rumours

Johnny G

Poor business continuity

Why the hell are they so reliant on just one man?? No company should find themselves in this position - it's incredibly poor management.

They need to train up a few more staff with the right communication skills and make them wear jeans at product launches Jobs styleé to make them look keeewl.... Credit where it's due, Apple sure do know how to market to the masses.

Yahoo! mocks Google Privacy Theatre

Johnny G

You! Forgot!

The! Obligatory! Exclamation! Marks! In! The! Title!

Delta Boeing 777 engine suffers 'uncommanded rollback'

Johnny G

Everyone has an opinion...

I find it amazing that everyone here has a speculation... surely the air accident investigators (of the Heathrow crash) *might* know better and be more qualified to say than people here?!

Armed cops ice South London devil dog

Johnny G

A bus driver??

What was it doing on a bus?? Trying to make a get-away?

Hadron boffins: Our meddling will not destroy universe

Johnny G


Large hardons colliding??? Surely NSFW! I don't want to see that kind of smut!

Dam, my dyslexia lets me down again...

UK's future super-stealth jumpjet 'rock solid' - Brit test pilot

Johnny G

@ Anonymous Coward

What on earth are you on about? It's like a different language! You MUST be a plane spotter ;-)

Sony Ericsson Cyber-shot C902 cameraphone

Johnny G

Not very well marketed

C902, K850i, K770i, C702, C903, C904, C905..... etc etc etc... WTF?

It's no wonder Apple have done well with their product - they know how to market stuff.

I'm an apple fan, and I know their phone is not very good. But they DO understand how to sell it.

World realizes Google home page is 'illegal'

Johnny G

What they should do is...

... wait until the idiots tyring to enforce this rediculous thing that no one will ever click on (let alone read or even care about) have spent tons of time and effort and money, then put the link on.

All their money down the pan.

Wait until it's gone quiet and then take the link off and start all over again and let them waste their cash.

NZ bank robber stashes loot where the sun don't shine

Johnny G

@ Tom

If it was plastic, it could have just been wiped clean rather than destoyed. The cash I mean, not his arse.

MSI releases £235 desktop Eee PC rival ahead of Asus

Johnny G

PS2 and Serial ports??

WTF???? In a device they are trying to make small, why oh why have they wasted valuable space (which I'm sure must be a premium) on old ports like that??

T5 opening turns into Airplane 3.0

Johnny G

2 companies

"British Airways admitted "teething problems" and put at least some of the problems down to "staff familiarity" and "delays in staff security provision""

Careful here - remember it's BAA that own the terminal and are responsible for it's operation, even if British Airways are the sole occupants. BA get a LOT of bad press for things beyond their control, like when BAA screw up.

Facebook loses a few bitches

Johnny G

My problem with Facebook is that

I, quite simply, cannot be arsed.

Halo Master Chief armour offered on eBay

Johnny G


It doesn't look a very practical costume for competing on Master Chef...

Brits split on ID cards

Johnny G

Good idea or not?

Whether or not they’re a good idea, the key question should be "why do we need them?"

I have yet to see any valid justification for them...

It's claimed they will help fight against terrorism. How so??

It's claimed they will reduce identity theft. How so??