Posts by Niall

Scientists unravel galactic spaghetti monster

Not the spaghetti monster...

...it's the eye of Sauron! Can the One Ring be destroyed by thrusting it into the ungainly maelstrom of a black hole? Let's find out!

UK BOFHs face psychometric dissection

Cattleprod

*SKRRSZZZZZT*

Virgin Galactic to unveil tool to fling rich people into space

Indescribably awesome.

Whatever you say about Branson or Virgin Galactic or any of the problems (it's suborbital, it's only 5 minutes of zero-g, it's retardedly expensive) associated with it, you have to admit that the idea of being able to buy a flight into space is INDESCRIBABLY AWESOME!

Hacker cops to $70k botnet rampage

Isn't this the guy...

Isn't this the guy the Reg did a profile on a few weeks/months ago as confessions of a teenage botmaster or soemthing like that? Interesting to see the follow-up if it is.

Lightning-zapgun maker gets more US gov cash

@AC

I rather think the point is that when they were trying to release on time, they weren't out of beta....

The laser-enhanced electric plasma lightning blaster cake is a lie.

@amanfromMars

True, but surely your scientist with training and experience in $field could have a look at the methodology used and the assumptions and pronounce them reasonable, ambitious, ludicrous or V14g0r.

Canuck faces life sentence for nude girl webcam scheme

Sense!

@David Wiernicki and Chris Martin

I agree wholeheartedly. Problems like this cannot be legislated away. Even if you lock up this guy for life, now that his story has done the rounds there will be at least one horny punter out there going "what an excellent idea" and while he'll probably pause at the thought of the life sentence, he'll think "I won't get caught". And the cycle will continue. The only thing to do is to educate your kids. And talk to them.

Kids know not to get into a car with a stranger. Kids know not to talk to a stranger in the street. This is one more instance of that.

Only insanity would lead Apple to make a mobile chip play

@stizzleswick

I was thinking the exact same thing. You get your low energy boxen, and not only are they cool because they produce shit all heat, they're cool because they're Apple. That said, for them to be taken up in any vast quantities, Apple will have to disregard their "pay for the label" pricing scheme.

There were some other interesting points made in some of the other comments too. It will be interesting to see what this eventually turns out to be...

Motorised meat-smoker droid vigilante patrols Atlanta

Hi Tech Vigilantism...

While I'm not a fan of vigilatism (that's not perpetrated by Batman), I have to say I'm impressed at the fact that this works. And if the heaviest armament the bot has is a water cannon, then that's a remarkably restrained response from an ex-Marine with a penchant for assault rifles.

That said, the "housing-disadvantaged" have a tough enough time as it is, and if this guy wants to be mayor, I hope he has a plan for solving this problem beyond hosing the poor sods down...

El Reg celebrates 10th birthday

Happy Birthday!

From a new comer who just keeps coming back for more.

Note: pictures of Simon Travaglia are absent so the authorities can't pass around mugshots of the BOFH who at this stage is responsible for more deaths than the plague.

Maybe the randomer demanding free drink was amanfromMars (whose comment above was *startlingly* lucid!).

Laser designated step'n'fetch wrinkle-robutler shown

Robot Hair Cut

It could use the Suck-Cut (TM) from Wayne's World!

"It's sucking my will to live!"

"Boy, that sure does suck..."

Personally, wouldn't want my hair cut by a robot. Where's the banter there, however, I welcome our new pachydermal overlords.

Al-Qaeda seeks geek fanatics for Jihoo!

@amanfromMars

You, sir/<insert whatever the correct way to address a bot is>, are a genius. Particular fan of the first comment.

Times pledges allegiance to Web 2.0

amanfromMars, you win the internet.

It's true.

Flores Hobbits were stunted humans

@David Wiernicki

What's potatoes, precious?

Poe-Tay-Toes? Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew...

I think they'd have been ok with the tubers alright...

Disintegrating wind turbine caught on camera

Vertical Blades

I read somewhere previously, possibly the Reg, that the blades on these turbines are very difficult to build and construct and maintain their structural integrity, and that someone had proposed or designed or prototyped a generator that was a set of blades which were essentially parallel to the mast around which they were rotating. Apparenlty they could much better withstand higher wind speeds and were easier to build and maintain than the windmill style turbines we have now?

Am I imagning things? Or did that idea turn out to be a steaming heap of poopy?

Lindsay Lohan packed off to morgue

ER

What's the bets some muppet with a hard-on for this particular eejit will injure hisself just so he can be subject to her ministrations in the ER. Or at least bleed all over the floor she'll be mopping up...

BOFH: Defusing the enthusiast

amanfromMars

<3

It's like half of each comment is written by a bot using some tasty Markov action and there also seems to be some sort of human editing going on too. Occasionally.

amanfromMars for prez.