* Posts by Paul

27 publicly visible posts • joined 14 Jan 2008

Pirate Party wins seat in European Parliament


Will they get their expenses paid

... in pieces of eight.


David Carradine found dead in Bangkok


Look at the last paagraph of the section 'Death'


Gordon 'to sacky' Wacky Jacqui

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That popping sound you hear ...

is thousands of Champagne bottles being opened around the country

Home Office: IPS to hang onto snaps of fingerprints

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An IPS spokesperson said the NBIS will be "separate and distinct" from Ident1, the existing national police fingerprint database.


For how long ?

Virgin Media switches to Gmail

Paris Hilton

Jumping into bed ...

Am I being too cynical or are Virgin Media just jumping into bed with any company that sells advertising and screw their customers ?

Paris ... jumping into bed - you work it out.

'Mad as hell' news agency declares war on light-fingered sites


"it'll be the case of AP v. Everybody"

Is Kyle's dad representing everybody ?

Report: Legalising drugs would save UK plc huge packet


What about the taxes ?

Whilst the cost of legalised drugs may start off cheaper than today once the Govt have started to see it as a cash cow where will the price end up ?

"Those guys think they're tough businessmen, but they wouldn't stand a chance against the likes of Glaxo and British American Tobacco."

Do the Glaxo and BAT reps carry uzis then ?

IPS misses its ID cards for foreigners target

Paris Hilton


And what happens when the ATM swallows your card ?

Paris coz ... do I have to spell it out ?

Vulture Central on total G20 terror lockdown


Door duty

Put the Moderatrix on the door and that should stop any undesirables coming in.

Women's lust for shopping linked to periods



not touching this with a 20' barge pole

* get coat and runs away *

Paris Hilton celebrates 28

Paris Hilton

28 human years ...

is only 4 dog years.

Surely she's been around than that ?

Brits and Yanks struck with embarasment embarrassment


Modern 'aids'

Do you think people are just too lazy to spell correctly nowadays because the spell checker will do it for them ?

And of course, if they're on the mobile there's always predictive text.

MoD orders £3m anti-friendly-fire 'Combat ID Server'

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"near real time" locations of friendly units

How "near real time" ?

Father of Playmobil dies at 79

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@ Sarah

Short, sweet and straight to the point - well done.

Sky hints at 3D TV launch



Sky have developed this for their own system, which will translate the data in the box before passing it to the TV.

I'm not sure but I doubt that a 3D signal can be broadcast on the analgue spectrum.

And of course the BBC didn't develop the iPlayer did it ...

Nokia, HTC and RIM dragged into patent dispute


Troll ahoy

More trolling by patent holders I'd guess.

This time bringing out the legal guns so that the (alledged) infringers have to choose between lose of sales or paying a hefty license fee.

If it turns out that the patent is invalid due to prior art (and I'd put a bet on that being the case) then I hope that they have to pay double back to the companies involved.

Somehow I doubt it though

Enormous HP box spotted from space


Early Xmas pressie

Has Lester opened his Chistmas present early and decided to play with it ?

Broadcasters and ISPs cosy up for iPlayer on Freeview


@ AC

If you hook up a cable box and use Virgin's system, or get a Freeview box and watch iPlayer you are capable of receiving a live feed, and thereore need a licence.

Clangers creator dies at 83


One poster on the BBC got it spot on

"Oliver hasn't died. Bagpuss has gone to sleep - and when Bagpuss goes to sleep all of his friends go to sleep."

Social workers sacked over Gary Glitter email


Some info missing ?

According to the Daily Mirror the social workers were "putting pictures of children from their own at-risk register on to a 'joke' email image of paedophile Gary Glitter."


US stocks up on semi-automatic rifles


@ John Imrie

Or get drafted into the local State Guard and shipped off to Iran / Afghanistan for a tour of duty.

Oki okays release of 'jumping robot leg' chair



A great idea ... until the machines rise up and users are thrown headlong into the nearest wall when they try to get up.

EU abolishes the acre


@ Pete

With 10 chains to the furlong and 8 furlongs to the mile there are (10 x 8 x 8) = 640 acres in a square mile.

Simple really.

YouTube rant missus hauled into court


Slander / libel

It's libel as there's a permanent record of it.

eBay ponders Skype bail out


@ Richard

Of course ebay may reduce their fees as they don't have to cover the Skype losses any more.

Mine's the one made from flying pigs

Two centuries of Hansard to move online


@ Sam

It was Brian Sedgemore

"Sedgemore later distinguished himself as a member of the Treasury Select Committee by shouting "snivelling little git" at the then Chancellor, Nigel Lawson. On being quizzed on this in a television interview, Sedgemore said he had probably been wrong to use the word "little", because Lawson was, in fact, fat."


Alcohol enema bloke wins 2007 Darwin Award


Re: sex on a pyramid-shaped metal roof

So, coming and going at the same time