Posts by dervheid

The mobile phone as self-inflicted surveillance

Tagged by choice?

Time to switch the mobile off when driving, methinks. I'd not put it past the bastards to start analysing the data for *speed* (if they're not already doing that!) and pumping out the speeding tickets. They're bound to have thought of that already, but it's not like Paw Broon & Eyebrows Darling need the extra income it would generate... Oh, wait a minute...

But, since I never, ever, ever exceed the speed limit....

"If you've nothing to hide, you've nothing to fear"?

Oh aye, but we ALL have *something* to hide (as far as this shower of dictatorial control freaks is concerned), that's for sure.

Tesla Roadster runs for 241 miles in Monte Carlo e-rally

How Slow?

"Tesla reckon the average speed for the entire journey was 45kph (28mph)."

This is supposed to be a frikkin Sports Car FFS.

Take your pick, Tesla. Speed or Range?

No, you can't have both, as this clearly shows.

8hours and 36 minutes to do 241 miles! You have to be kidding?

Sorry, that's a FAIL.

"Nobody is saying what sort of range Frentzen got from the car."

I'll bet it wasn't anywhere *near* the "indicated 61km (38 miles) of juice left in the battery pack"

NASA: Clean-air regs, not CO₂, are melting the ice cap

All Hail...

The great saviour!

DIESEL!

Woo Hoo!

PETA pitches for Pet Shop Animal Shelter Boys

Going for a bacon Sarnie?

I'm up for that.

Or better still, the full english, all day 'breakfast'

The one with "eat more meat" on the back

Wacky Jacqui spanked by husband

Surely she can't wriggle out of this one?

Oh, she has.

Police union leader calls for 'killer games' sales ban

“when a chance to remove a probable cause exists, it must be used”

Now, when have we heard that sort of rhetoric from a German in uniform before?

Let me think...

Flames, as it'll be the books next, you know...

Tata to release UK's first 'serious' electric car

@"And how much for a petrol jobbie?"

ROFL!

I just have this image of something malodorous and flammable deposited at the roadside by a solvent jakey.

Answer to the question is therefore one pound, as in: " Gonnae geissa poon furra litra unleadit pal?"

Vatican vetos 'dot god' domain

@I think we can agree there are bastards of all beliefs.

I don't particularly recall too many Buddhist 'bastards'.

But I could be wrong...

P...

@ "Gore wants a .eco? "

No, it wont be anything like a .com, you're 1 letter away.

It would be the same as .con

@ Sahrah Bee

.hook

.line

.rod

.reel

.anglingtimes

Oh, the limitless possibilities...

of gTLD

Cue silly competition?

And what happened to ".Jedi" may I enquire?

.freetard

.sheeple

and of course

.paperscitizen

Israelis develop 'safe' plutonium: good for power, bad for weapons

@ simon elliott

no, just less Maple syrup.

Industry’s behavioural ad guidelines criticised

Specific 'Opt in'...

is the ONLY acceptable option.

Not hidden away in a site or service T&Cs. It must be presented separately, clearly and SIMPLY defined (no fucking legalese mumbo-jumbo), so that there is NO DOUBT about what you are signing up to.

At least 3, positive 'clicks' required to activate the 'service'.

A confirmation e-mail sent, with SIMPLE instructions on how to unsubscribe from the 'service'. These should NOT be any more complex than the signing up procedure.

A confirmation e-mail sent to confirm that also, with SIMPLE instructions on how to check that any cookies set by the 'service' have been deleted, and how to delete them if they have not. This e-mail also to confirm that ALL RECORDS held by the 'service' relating to the 'subscriber' have been PERMANENTLY DELETED from the 'service provider's' records, with the exception of basic contact details (Name, email, date subscription started, date subscription ended).

Just how hard is that to organise?

Or would that make things too easy for the suckers?

Ford shows off e-van concept

"an ideal solution for taxi use"??

Do they have *any* concept of how many miles a taxi will get through in a 24 hour working period?

It all gets back to the basics;

Running time / Recharge time, and, Recharge Time / Charge current.

where

Recharge time = Taxi not making money.

Charge Current = Infrastructure costs.

Can't honestly see too many, if any, taxi drivers taking up the 'leccy only option.

They might make interesting milk-floats or garbage trucks though.

Wait, didn't we do that already?

Oh yes, so we did.

Expedition to probe cavern lake 3km beneath Antarctic ice

"Bizarre, 'extreme' prehistoric lifeforms expected"

So THAT'S where the current NuLabour cabinet ministers are from.

Forget about exploration, just take them back and seal up whatever hole they crawled out of in the first place.

BT accused of 'sharp practice' on rolling contracts

Yet another example...

of the voracious appetite for cash BT has developed, along with a 'we can do no wrong' attitude.

Wankers.

Last call for UK liberties

@"Technically, asking for your ID card is the one thing they cannot do "

As you point out, in a round about fashion...

YET!

"Pa..."

How about if I just cut it to...

"Papers!"

Or is that still too irritating for you?

Then again, how irritated would you be if you really WERE being asked to present your 'Papers' on a regular basis, at random, in the street, to the Police, or any other Government Official who demanded to see them, whilst going about your own business.

Bearing in mind that under such a regime as NuLabour would dearly love (it would appear, anyway), that the concept of 'your own business' would no longer exist as privacy for the ordinary 'Citizen' would have been outlawed as being detrimental to State Security.

"Papers, Citizen"

The last line...

sums it all up beautifully.

"Papers, Citizen!"

Three months on, you still can't get off the DNA database

"Papers, Citizen"

"That is all. Be on your way now!"

Brit nuke subs exposed on Google Earth

Also clearly on view

Check out the view of Rosyth Naval Dockyard/Graveyard. Several subs on view there.

Ryanair may charge cattle to use the bog

Just take..

an empty bottle with you.

Then it'll be us taking the piss for a change.

BT reprograms biz customers as hotspots

BT - you suck!

"BT claims the OpenZone users are securely separated from local users". Do you think anyone will believe you.

First 'Webwise' (spits), now this.

You really *are* such a security concious outfit.

Ooops, almost forgot about that oh so secure BT Homehub (the old one, of course)

Small biz still struggling for funding as RBS flounders

@ nonymous Coward Posted Thursday 26th February 2009 13:04 GMT

True, but then it's not likely to be part of the centre-pin of the Global Economy. Hence my 'domino rally' analogy previously.

RBS is just about one of the biggest 'dominoes' on the planet.

"we'll spend decades paying it back"

Wrong units of time.

I believe the units you require are 'centuries', possibly 'millennia' .

As for "Fred the Shred" doing the decent thing, it'll be a frosty day in hell...

Domino Rally...

If RBS was to fall, it'd take a LOT of other little dominoes with it.

It would make the current 'recession' look like a dimple by comparison.

Stargazers peer into the 'Eye of God'

"Paris - at least she exists."

Have you actually, physically met her?

For all you know, she could just be a figment of your over-active imagination.

"Just be grateful it's not the Arse of God. "

That's where we are at the moment, is it not. It would certainly explain the current levels of 'deep shit' we appear (to me anyway, but I could be imagining all this) to be experiencing.

Earthworm blamed for laptop crash

"My dog is at least as smart as Sarah Palin."

But then again so is an amoeba!

I'm sure your dog is smarter than that!

Let me be the third person...

to welcome our New Earthworm Underlords, sorry, Overlords!

Dominican lad suffers six-day stiffy

Six day stiffy?

My wife'd be happy if I had a six minute stiffy!

It's true what they say, auld age disnae come itsel!

I'll bet that experience will curb his enthusiasm for a while.

No mention of whether his "female friend" was happy with the non fading erection or not!

Microsoft trades goodwill for TomTom Linux satisfaction

The resumption of hostilities...

on their road to 'World Domination'.

Pick a (relatively) small target and await outcome, whilst fattening up the patent trolls.

'Gates' icons now need changed to Ballmer icons.

Debt collection can be harassment, rules court

Brilliant!

Finally, signs of a 'switched on' Judge.

About time the bully-boys were reined in.

Pirate Bay prosecutors get jiggy with charge sheet - again

Surely they can't keep on doing that?

The PB's legal team should be looking to have the whole thing thrown out if the persecution, sorry, prosecution can't even decide on what they're being accused of.

FFS, any Judge, in any country, should be able to see this for the utter national embarrassment it's becoming and be throwing it out anyway.

They just look like a bunch of twats now.

Samsung unsheathes screaming phone

Instantly reminded me of...

this

http://www.dilbert.com/fast/2008-10-20/

NASA CO₂ scan satellite launch fails

"Plan to settle carbon debate derailed"

Even if the launch had been a success, I very much doubt that the results garnered from this would have done anything of the sort.

Fuelled the fire considerably, more like.

After all, AFAIK, it's (or rather was) only capable of a 'here and now' set of readings.

Unless NASA have cracked time-travel...

Of course, I could be wrong...

Last.fm denies data handover to RIAA

Scrobbling?

WTF kind of made-up non word is that?

It does kind of create a mental image of someone rummaging around in the proverbial, up to their elbows in it, looking for "owt for nowt".

Probably quite appropriate.

Father of ID cards moots compulsory passports instead

@ Dave

Nope, no flying pigs, no u-turn, and definitely NOT " had a genuine change of heart and now realises that NuLab have gone too far and thinks it should backtrack and respect people's rights a bit more"

The is is just the same shit from a slightly different angle (it's all smoke & mirrors).

The only way Bunkett & Co will have a change of heart is if they have the fuckers surgically removed.

Google's email service goes down

Still cream crackered!

Just what kind of free service are the offering here?

Isn't it enough that we let them pimp, sorry, of course I meant analyse, our usage data in return.

I did wonder why my inbox was surprisingly empty at 7-45 this morning. I suspect they started having problems way before 10-15.

Hurlable 360° cam-grenades used by IDF in Gaza

Just how much useable info...

will it be able to gather before its operational limits are exceeded by the butt of an AK-47 impacting it?

Or does it have a Mission: Impossible-esque audio warning " This ball will self destruct in..."

Ruling: Gov reports into ID scheme must be disclosed

@ Martin

What about the Poll Tax?

We all know why...

the OGC logo is one of the world's most apt!

Just how much dosh has been wasted chasing this around the tribunals and courts?

Must be potentially a show stopper I guess!

College IT departments told to deploy anti-terror dragnet

"and then we can prosecute them for what they've done."

SARCASM ALERT!!!

Has to be.

You don't *really* believe that the Tories (for it will, likely, be them) , or any other party, will actually "prosecute them for what they've done."

Not a chance, matey.

Unfortunately.

Just how many more examples...

of NuLabours Totalitarian intentions do the sheeple actually need?

Restricting student's (or anyone's) access to information. It'll be an "Approved Reading List" next, followed by an "Authorised Reading List", followed by a single "This is All You Need to Know" document. And it'll be a very small document at that.

Be afraid!

"Papers, Citizen!"

Blogger fights Psion's claim to 'netbook' name

As rediculous as it would be if...

a certain fast food outlet was trying to stop people using the term "burger", when they meant "beefburger"

Judge strips MS 'Vista Capable' lawsuit of class action status

A dead duck then?

Looks that way.

If you can't get any money out of the monster, stop putting money IN, people!

BP snips IT contractor rates

All those profits...

and their STILL intent on shitting on people.

A 10% cut for around 900 contractors must REALLY make a BIG impact on the profits / dividends.

Be interesting to see how many opt to tell them to ram their jobs either now, or when things pick back up again.

And just how much of a performance decrease they'll get from these guys.

Makes me sick.

Minister trashes ex-spook chief's liberty warning

He's right, you know.

"wrong to suggest we have somehow stumbled towards a police state."

True.

NuLabour have driven headlong towards this end.

His voting record speaks for itself here;

http://www.theyworkforyou.com/mp/tony_mcnulty/harrow_east#votingrecord

Spy boss damns government's culture of fear

shitty spelling

Correction accepted.

The BBC can't seem to agree on the spelling themselves though, both variations being used in different stories.

Convenient that, don't you think?

WhiteWashed away? / RotaCyclic

Yup. This story WAS front page on the BBC news site yesterday morning. By mid-afternoon, however, it had gone completely. Typing "Stella Rimmington" into the search didn't bring it up either (still doesn't) If you add "spanish interview" to the search string, it brought it up yesterday, but not now. It requires a VERY specific "stella rimmington La Vanguardia" to get the story to register.

Whitehall Whitewash?

Damn Right!

UK 'bad' pics ban to stretch?

"criminalising an action that they cannot police"

Since when did our NuLabourian Overlords let a little thing like that stop them.

Create the 'crime'.

Develop the 'detection'.( Whether flawed or not)

Persecute the unbeliever!

Sorry, of course I meant "Prosecute the lawbreaker".

Anybody think that they'll stop at 'bad' pics & vids.

Me neither.

All dissent will be quelled with the "those with nothing to hide have nothing to fear" call to the sheeple.

Info chief slaps Met on CCTV in pubs

Un-be-fucking-leivable!

So they only appear interested in getting, what is to all intents and purposes, a 'mug-shot' of everyone entering the premises. No apparent interest, it would seem, in any CCTV of the interior of the pub, which would show any 'crime' being committed.

As for the mealy-mouthed, toeing-the-party-line response from his MP!

Check out her voting record at;

http://www.theyworkforyou.com/mp/emily_thornberry/islington_south_and_finsbury#votingrecord

What more can you add there?

Is that the faint sound of Jack-Boots I can hear?

Welcome to NuLabouria. "Papers, Citizen!"