* Posts by David Simpson

118 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Dec 2007


Hulu headed for subscription service scheme?

David Simpson
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Kill Hulu

Yes why not completely kill Hulu by making it subscription based, big media needs to realise the gold rush days are over, I'm looking forward to Hulu arriving in the UK but I will not be paying subscription fees for something I have to stream over my internet connection which I also pay for, I'll stick to free content and torrents, If he really wants to ween people off free content then give us an ad supported alternative to P2P.

Phone apps help blind 'see'

David Simpson

And Peter said I shall order the loaves and fishes with this handy app

And Low the Virgin Father of the Jesus-Phone said "they shall make Apps and they shall be good"

When will the resurrection app be released in time for next Easter ?

Apple Schmucki to sue over fake iPods

David Simpson
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Apple sue the poor suckers who buy the fakes not the rip-off artists that sell them, that's a smart business move, maybe next year the swiss will give away Sony MP3 players instead.

YouTube flooded with porn

David Simpson

@Phil whose children are delicate little flowers

@ Phil

Every remember childhood ? Collecting the rain destroyed porn mags disguarded by underage drinkers the night before.

You kids already look at porn now they have the internet, and the sad but true answer is it won't do them any harm since in very few years they will be taking part themselves.

Although I'm sure your kids are angels and would never do such things *wink wink*

Conficker: Hold the funeral, it's not dead yet

David Simpson
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Norton ?

Hi ! I'm a security software company and I want you to buy my overpriced bloated software suite instead of excellent free alternatives (AVG, Avast, PC Tools AV, Avira etc.)

People would want to buy my software if they only new how many evil threats are out there !

So.... I'll publish "independent research" to scare everyone into buying my crap !

I don't care Norton I really don't last virus I had was Blaster, and that was M$ fault, Avast has been fine for me and a large dose of common sense.

Wacky Jacqui defends Michael Savage ban

David Simpson

Wacki Jackie we all HATE YOU

Wacki Jackie = 33% of the reason Labour will have the lowest amount of seats in their history after the next general election.

Ireland bucks trend with anti-blasphemy law

David Simpson

Satanist ?

So as a satanist can i have catholic priests arrested for insulting my god ? (the Devil)

Being from Ireland myself I find it hilarious how easily government ministers make all those irish jokes completely true.

Run for the hills, ALOT of people will be in court for a LONG time if this one passes.

At least on the Register I can still say screw Jesus and all his little minions.

AMD to support Intel AVX instructions

David Simpson

Althon ?

Spell check *

Althon should be Athlon

Windows 7 and the Linux lesson

David Simpson
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Yes M$ rush it out please.......

Ubuntu has very little plug and play ability with even the most simple USB devices, one of the several reasons I can't be bothered with it.

I think it's hilarious that El Reg is saying Microsoft is dragging it's heels, it is planned for release in 2010 and we will still be getting it early, its more important we get it right than getting it very early.

No comment about Snow Leoaprd how long has that been in beta for now ? since the middle of last year.... funny how that wasn't mentioned, must a slow news day I'd rather be running 7 in three months than Ubuntu now.

Apple eyes patent for web silence

David Simpson

Ummm just like Vista ?

OMG what a cutting edge feature, it's just like Vista's ability to mute individual programs from the volume menu, LOL go Apple continuing to patent other peoples ideas.

Profs: Human race must become Hobbits to save planet

David Simpson
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Or why don't we all just stop beeding so much, alot easier to feed less mouths than give more mouths less.

Symbian show struggles for identity

David Simpson
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Symbian needs sex

Symbian needs a large dose of sexy if it has any hope of catching up with android and iPhone OS.

Symbian has looked the same for the last 5 yearsand it didn't look good 5 years ago.

The Netbook Newbie's Guide to Linux

David Simpson
Black Helicopters

40% Return rate anyone ?

And its certainly a mystery why linux netbooks have a 40% return rate, the manufacturers don't even know how to support it ! Pretty ridiculous from Acer they seem to be shooting themselves in the foot.

Microsoft conjures imaginary 'Apple Tax'

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sad sad sad on both sides

I found the Apple Mac Vs Pc ads really sad and in fact they helped put me off Apple stuff, but low and behold M$ new ads just do exactly the same thing, they are also sad attempts at showing us their "truth".

Really both Apple and M$s ads are very successful at pushing me toward a different solution all together.

Apple eyes new-age iPhone answering machine

David Simpson

Does Apple patent other peoples ideas on purpose ?

This sounds exactly like a feature present in SightSpeed for the last few years, its a free video/audio messenger like iChat.

If a contact isn't online you can record a video message and send it to them to view next time they are online.

Wake me up when "journalists" manage to do a small amount of research for their stories.

There is nothing new under the sun.

Ad watchdog gives thumbs up for female TV orgasms

David Simpson

I'm going to heaven..

Because I watch five TVs at once and write down anything I see that might offend young children and compalin straight away, just like Jesus would do as it says in the bible

"Thy shall stick thy nose into thy neighbours business and judge what is offensive based on thy own limited views of the world"


Wanna upgrade from Windows 7 beta? Go back to Vista first

David Simpson


It is never a good idea to upgrade install an OS. NEVER NEVER NEVER!

I'll be doing a fresh install with the RC and a fresh install with the RTM anyone who doesn't is asking for trouble.

Why the iPhone's megapixelage alone won't matter

David Simpson

What complete nonsense!

"Merely pumping up megapixelage doesn't make a camera better. A 3.2-megapixel camera with the same sub-optimal optics and image-processing circuitry as is in the current iPhone will produce equally crappy photos - just bigger ones."

WRONG ! The reason phone manufacturers use CMOS senors and not CCD is because a phone generally has one general processing unit this unit processes photos, mp3 files and everything else, I had a 2Mpx SE camera phone and it took really impressive photos (compared to an old 2Mpx Nikon camera) when i upgraded to a Samsung U900 Slide phone I was blown away by how good the 5Mpx camera was in it, and it even took video. The images were sharp and had no noise at all (except low light which is a problem for any CMOS) I could even use them as wallpaper on my 19" monitor.

So basically you are talking rot, the iPhone's camera is a cheap piece of crap and not even up to the quality of the 2Mpx sensor in the original SE walkman phone (from 2004), the iPhones camera does not shoot video because Apple don't want it to or can't spare any CPU power to manage it (since jailbroken phones can shoot video)

How about calling a spade a spade, if Apple put a better unit in the new iPhone it will also need a bit more power from a new ARM chip as the iPhone is obviously not powerful enough to run more than a cheap ass 2MpxCMOS.

BBC fined £150k over Manuelgate

David Simpson

What was the problem again ?

So Brand and Ross told Sachs that Brand had slept with his daughter. Hmmmmmm

Positively scandalous if it was a lie, but it wasn't and Miss Bailey makes porn (CFNM) whos website declares "Grand Daughter of Andrew Sachs" She's the one who embarressed her dear old Grandfather (who is an adult after all) and he has not done badly out of it now that he's starring in a soap.

Maybe I'm missing something but what was the problem again ? 98% of complaints were made long after the show broadcast so who cares shouldn't these people all be out setting fire to Google street view cars or something ?

Great now the left arm has fined the right arm that makes complete sense, whats the point of the BBC anyway we pay for it and Gordo Brown and his mates fine them or slap them on the wrist if they don't do as they are told. As soon as the moral majority object to the smallest thing, we might as well have ads, I'd prefer advertisers censoring my viewing rather than the fearful middle classes and the governement who tries to keep them voting labour.

MS coughs to hokey-cokey IE8 option in Windows 7

David Simpson
Gates Halo

So really what you are saying is.....

It works exactly like Vista. Open Programs (add/remove) and click turn windows features on and off.

There you go the "ability" to deselect IE etc. Although being able to deselect Media Center is a "new" "feature".

Windows 7 test build 'turns off' Internet Explorer 8

David Simpson

NOT a new feature.

So just like you can remove IE6/7 in XP or Vista, in the add/remove programs > Turn off Windows Features.


Just being able to uninstall IE would be nice instead of the usual "disable" nonsense.

Windows update already has it's own dialogue in Vista so why do really need to keep IE anymore ?

Hollywood to totally recall Total Recall

David Simpson



Much like "The Day the Earth Stood Still"

I think if we just remove the plot stick in a bit about the enviroment then go all 21st century on their asses with CGi it will rock.......umm no.

Intel sues Psion over 'netbook' trademark

David Simpson

Stupid posters everywhere

Psion cannot start using the Pentium brand name in a couple of years as payback stupid, Intel still sell Pentiums.

The point here is no-one really sells netbooks they sell EeePcs or Aspire Ones, the term netbook is generic it describes a catagory not one product. If Psion didn't product any netbooks then why should it keep the patent on the name.

And Bassey your stupid story about Cadbury makes no sense since the name cadbury is a name and has no actual connection to chocolate, whereas a netbook is perfectly descriptive as a noun to describe a notebook with just enough cpu/power to access the net !

Virgin Media boosts bottom tier broadband

David Simpson


Piece of advice to Virgin users, If you are on the L package and are still under a 1 year contract then no you can't change what you pay or what speed you receive.

If you are not under a year contract with Virgin then WHY NOT ? This is how you get a good discount you phone up say "I want to sign up for another year what will you do for me?"

I've been with Virgin for many years and everytime my contract and deal runs out I phone up and get the new one, that is how it's done and how I'M still only paying £30 for phone, L broadband and TV service.

'No Office 14 this year,' says Ballmer

David Simpson
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Why ?

Is there a special reason we need office 14 this year ?

I dropped MS Office along time ago for Open Office, which is slightly limited but IBM's free Lotus Symphony has everything anyone could need with plenty of plug-ins.

Google's email service goes down

David Simpson

Who did it.......

Who typed google into google search and broke the internet ?

Gmail down for fours hours and now back up, not even enough time to start looting !

Father of ID cards moots compulsory passports instead

David Simpson


WOO HOO ! I love it, I always wondered what the point of was of having ID cards and passports.

Being from Belfast originally I shal be replacing my present British passport with an Irish one so no database for me WOO HOO

Vista SP2 release candidate imminent?

David Simpson
Gates Halo

Yes yes how original

Windows 7 is Vista SP2 or SP3 blah blah blah.

I fix PCs for a living and while Vista carries a bit more CPU/RAM overhead than XP I still prefer Vista.

Mind you I have been using Windows 7 Beta for the past few weeks and it's definetly a step up. Why would anyone want to keep using creaky old XP ? The same luddites all cryed about XP when it first launched and claimed they would stick with 98SE (the buggiest OS I have ever used) XP only became usable after SP2 which everyone seems to forget.

If you can't manage to learn to live with a new OS then join a different industry cause things change in IT fast, and most of the complaints I have heard have more to do with people expecting Vista to work exactly like XP.

Vista has been fine since SP1 and Media Center has been powering my home TV entertainment system since beta 1 with no serious problems.

It's easy to poke fun at M$ and sad that they allowed Vista out the door way too early but the promise shown on Windows 7 might just restore my faith in them.

Boffins ponder Geordies' lack of winter clothing

David Simpson

Not just Geordies....

I'm from Belfast and the same applies there, it also happens in Edinburgh (where I live) and Glasgow.

I think it comes down to not carrying coats around all night, you go from taxi to club and by the time you move on to another club you are drunk enough not to notice or care about the weather.

And yes obviously southerners are just soft.

Dear Obama: Please consider open-source a waste of your time

David Simpson

double dose of Bush

"We, the authors, are proud to live and work in the nation that elected you and hope your presidency will be as successful as your campaign,"

Yes guys you also live in the same country that elected Nixon, Regan and a double dose of Bush so don't feel to proud of yourselves.

Apple scores 'power connector' patent

David Simpson

And in other news

Apple is presently trying to patent a metal vehicle with four wheels and an engine that burns oil to produce power its called iAutomobile, you will have to return it to Apple to refuel it and 3rd party manufacturers are making gel covers as we speak to protect it's easily scratchable surface.

These idiots are trying to trademark "multi-touch" as well where as multi-touch has existed for years we all just called it foreplay.

Mac malware tide on the rise

David Simpson

never never never

The point about trojans is most mactards are much less technically informed than windows users (they have no choice) They buy much more expensive machines and make great targets.

I work in IT support and the ONLY infections i've seen on customers machines for the past 3 years have been trojans/bribeware/spyware that the user has installed by accident.

Obviously this doesn't happen to Register readers but the general public are even emailing and recommending these trojans to their friends.

A really smart Trojan writer would add a defrag and reg clean to their backdoor so the user actually likes having a virus "it made my machine so fast"

Judges grant McKinnon extradition review

David Simpson

All theft is easy compared to hard days work you lefty twats

If you wander into a car park and someone has left their door open with a wallet full of cash and a laptop sitting in plain view I would close the door and tell the parking attendant, just because it would be easy to steal someone elses property does not make it right you half wit.

If someone came wandering into my house through an open back door I would certainly treat them as hostile and eject them.

If i walked into a bank and the bank managers door was open does this mean i could just wander in and "look for UFOs"

The real truth is if Gary had been looking for bank account numbers instead of UFOs the general public would be foaming at the mouth. He trespassed illegally where he should not have been AssBurgers has no bearing at all, most mummy's boys are an easy diagnosis especially when they still live at home in their 40s.

The sheer amount of lefty twats arguing to let him off just because they were uncaught teenage hackers beggers belief !? Get back to selling your Big Issues and Socialist Worker and stop wasting your money on internet cafes.

I find the "young man" statement hilarious his mother is obviously an empty nest nut job, how will she cope when he gets send down ? Maybe she should have been a better mother and stopped that young 30 year old rascal from watching the X-Files in the 90s it was obviously too much for him.

Apple boasts record Q1 as revenue tops $10bn

David Simpson

Steve's Cum ?

Palm have had touch gestures for years, but then considering Apple has been trying to trademark "multi-touch" what do you expect.

Apple repackage other people's ideas then patent them, all their own touch tech came from company called fingerworks in 2004, Apple don't innovate they buy up other peoples ideas and wrap them in white plastic or occasionally steal them.

Like Dashboard, which is a direct rip of Konfabulator, without a patent poor old Konfabulator just stopped making a mac client and moved to windows ending up as Yahoo Widgets.

Even Spotlight was grabbed by buying a german tech company, and the "pioneering" brick technology for their new laptops is just CNC machining.

Mactards are so uninformed they swallow Steve's juice without ever wondering where it really cums from.

Tiscali pulls plug on 186K

David Simpson
Paris Hilton

Who ?

So who is 186k ?

Paris because at least I've heard of her !

Conficker Autoplay ruse gets teeth into Windows 7

David Simpson

Anti-virus ?

so an active virsu scanner doesn't detect this ? hmmm

Opera sings praises of Microsoft-browser statement

David Simpson

IF it stinks like.....

My problem with IE is first it's shit and second it cannot be removed.

Yes i can add/remove windows features and it hides but it is still there. If i want to run windows update IE has to be used.

As for how do you get on the internet without IE, really simple when inputting username etc. on first boot you get to pick a browser too, default install all, you untick what you don't want.

I think it's important to remember Apple have a very small share of the market and when you drag safari into the waste bin it stays there software update still runs.

Until FF came along we were all stuck in active X hell and Microsoft nearly succeeded in killing it with their questionable business practice back when it was netscape.

I agree the pro-eu/opera crap is annoying (I am not a fan) but it might help us all have a happy ending.

Google G1 successor spied in video?

David Simpson

Old news

Come on Register, Engadget already called this a fake days ago, its a sci-phone using a crap os that has had its look copied from Android, crazy considering Android is free for them to use anyway.

Mac mini said to get Ion innards

David Simpson
Jobs Halo

Apple TV ?

Where does Apple TV fit in to this ? The present models use old pentium m CPUs (or maybe core solos now) Could this be a low cost mac mini/ Apple tv in one ? Could be a great little media center if you are willing to pay for iTunes movie rentals and snow leopard will have a refreshed front row they maybe be a bit more functional the present version and apple tv, the 9400 is bound to be able to playback HD, several atom netbooks can manage 720p maybe Nvidias new platform can manage 1080p.

Hope the price is right which with Apple it usually isn't.

Apple moves to unify its OS and interface

David Simpson

OS X86 for me please

Is this going to be the same unified UI that they told us was coming with Leopard ?

I honestly don't think OS X for PC is that far away, especially if SJ is forced to retire from Apple.

Much of Apple's recent computer success has more to do with Vista's problems and a fast well designed replacement in Windows 7 may start to turn the tide again against Apple.

If sales of Macs start to flag what CEO in their right mind would turn down the chance to sell millions of copies of it's OS to the masses and help ensure iTunes/iPod/iPhone domination for years to come. I'm sure M$ is shaking in their boots at the thought !

I have ran OS X86 on several PCs and it's a surprisingly smooth experience very little work would need to be done on Apple's end especially since Macs are basically PCs with Intel's EFI added.

Wouldn't the market be a nicer place with more competition ?

HTC Touch Viva budget Windows Mobile smartphone

David Simpson

Save the trees ? Come on reghistert5

"fashion-led eco-conscience"

Do you honestly think a CD with a manual on it is better for the enviroment than a paper manual ?

More bull-crap spread by enviromentalists with no scientific qualifications or logical abilities.

Paper is farmed in purpose planted forests, if you want to save virgin forests then stop eating hamburgers, that is main reason they are being cleared for beef farms.

Stop repeating idiotic nonsense

Church of Scientology seeks 'ban' against HIV+ protesters

David Simpson

Dali Lama after L. Ron

@ Francis Fish

"Take the Dalai Lama for example, a pure spirtualist leader or the leader of an elite class who wants to subjugate an entire population by using Democratic Imperialism? no that's silly, after all he wasn't on the CIA payroll (definitely not $1.7m a year), nor did he run away to india with (60 tons) of Tibettan treasure, and certainly there was no using "peasants" as slaves, sexually abusing young boys or organising guerillas (terrorists by another name), no support for nuclear testing, nope, he did none of that stuff, move on... nothing to see here (oh, and is in no way related to the sarin nerve gas release in Tokyo, either before you ask)."

I love you and want to have your baby-fish

And to the coward who mentioned "Choice" I am straight and have decided not to have children it's really easy, and the most enviromentally friendly thing you can do. Several gay couples I am friendly with have kids, sexuality has nothing to do with breeding, breeding really is a choice.

Nvidia forecasts massive Q4 revenue drop

David Simpson
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Faulty GFX

And I'm sure the massive write off on defective chipsets from the past year don't help either.

But then an economic downturn is the best time to write off stuff like that when everyone else is posting poor results.

McKinnon lawyers push for UK trial

David Simpson

Legal aid ? how much ahve we paid for this ass already ?

Asperger's syndrome does not stop people telling right from wrong, it is therefore no excuse for what Gary did.

The crime was commited in the states, thats where the damaged computers reside.

If i used a remote control plane to blow something up in America while i controlled it in the UK i could certainly see why America would want me to stand trial there.

For all the "stick it the man" idiots, America cannot just have you sent to stand trial for nothing, HE ADMITTED IT, IF HE HAD HACKED YOUR COMPUTER I'M SURE YOU WOULD FEEL DIFFERENTLY, or if he hacked your bank's computers, hacking is illegal for good reason, leaving a back door open does not mean people who enter your house through it are not commiting a crime, can you imagine a burglar saying "the door was open so i just went to see if there was anything worth stealing like pieces of a crashed alien space craft"

The real question is how much this joker has cost in legal aid, he is a total idiot as are all the idiots defending him.

I've only shagged two blokes, insists Paris Hilton

David Simpson
Paris Hilton


Seeing as Paris has been caught on camera having sex TWICE with two different guys then

I think someone didn't realise she meant "I've only shagged two blokes ON CAMERA"

Phew ! what a slow news day is no-one at CES ?

iPlayer chief pushes tiered charging for ISPs

David Simpson
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Why does a public body kiss commerical ass ?

I watch BBC, ITV & C4 streams through a useful plugin for media center called TunerFreeMCE.

I pay for a 10Mb connection with Virgin and I pay for a TV licence. Why exactly should i pay more ?

I pay for 10Mb downstream and I can't watch a 1.5Mb stream over that ?

We pay for the BBC isn't it about time they stopped kissing the asses of ISPs and gave us what we pay for ? Give us (the people who pay for it) the high quality streams don't give them to ISPs so they can sell them to us, surley that goes against the BBC's charter.

Mac OS 10.5.6 problems? Apple suggests shampoo

David Simpson

Think Different!

Yep, my updated macbook wakes from sleep then takes 1-4 minutes to reconnect to my wifi.

So glad "it just works" 10.5.6 is certainly becoming "a bag of hurt", I'm certainly starting to "think different" about macs now that I've seen so my many bugs in so many updates and in new products.

I wish i was a PC

Apple tells Mac users: Get anti-virus

David Simpson


So why recommend paid for crap like Norton or McAfee. I use iAntivirus from PC Tools very good and free.

UK.gov says extreme porn isn't illegal if you delete it...

David Simpson

Bury Labour and choke Jacki but not during sex (ick!)

While i would like to choke Jacki Smith I certainly would not have sex with her while doing this for fear of breaking the law.

Just when you think the world is a better place and we are moving toward a less censored society, Jacki decides against all scientific data that violent porn causes crime.

But then since when did the government listen to experts ? (Cannabis, WMDs, NATO)

What Gordon and Jacki don't seem to get, even Darling doesn't get it, is after the next election they will all be resigning for giving labour it's lowest seat count in the commons since records began.

Yes Labour WE ALL HATE YOU ! after Afghanistan, Iraq, Data losses, Oil prices, Food prices, The credit crunch, ID Cards, Extreme porn laws. Spoilt for choice when it comes time to vote, BURY THEM !

McKinnon faithful to stage further US embassy demo

David Simpson

Hes an idiot let him burn

Deport him, he admitted guilt and has now wasted thousands of pounds in legal aid.

I don't care if the Americans set him on fire, he is a waste of space, hacking is illegal and should stay illegal, if you don't know that you shouldn't remotely access military computers then you obviously never watched "war games"