* Posts by Joe

278 publicly visible posts • joined 14 Mar 2007


Triangular buttons key to touchscreen typing success - inventor

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Come on you whinging sods

This is a great idea! It's no good having a square touch area over triangular keys, or a triangular touch area over square keys, think about it. With the touch area and the keys both triangular, you can touch the top part of each key and be sure that no other key will accidentally be pressed.

Twitter Yi not, as Beijing bins Bing

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And yet

It's considered morally acceptable to have most of our electronic goods made in that police state.

BT rejects wholesale price changes


@ Jared Hunt

You're wrong. The line rental is a standing charge for the voice service.

In France, you can have ADSL via the copper pair but choose to have no voice service active - i.e. no dial tone, no phone service. You just pay for the ADSL. It's cheaper than having ADSL plus voice service.

In the UK, you can't have ADSL without also renting the phone service. Whether you make calls or not, you still have to pay £11 or so per month for voice service rental. There's no choice.

So yes, it is technically possible to have ADSL without a phone line.

Incidentally, when I moved house my BT voice line in my old place was cut off, but the O2 broadband connection was still active a week later. So it is possible!

Taxpayer coughs for AOL Connie's flat


Oh no!

Not Wiggy - he was my headteacher in high school, and a pretty damn good one too. Everyone liked and respected him, even the scallies. His rebuttal sounds reasonable, but I was so hoping he'd be one of the whiter-than-white ones!

Beeb tech boss seeks to expand TV licence online


Obvious answer?

Firstly, I don't have a TV licence but I do watch programmes on iPlayer. Nice and legal, but is it right? I don't watch a lot - Have I Got News For You, Screenwipe, the occasional history documentary - but is it right that I get that for free? Not really.

A blanket broadband license would be wrong, though. I think the obvious solution is to include a username/password with the TV licence which will enable licence holders to watch iPlayer. And perhaps a pay-per-view option for those of us who don't watch much or who live abroad.

Does that sound sensible or am I missing something?

Apple power brick sparks lawsuit


As I'm sure someone else has already pointed out...

...the 45 watt MacBook Air adaptor has a much more substantial connector at the laptop end, with a better cord grip. It probably hasn't had the same problems as the MacBook one.

On a personal note, while the MacBook power lead is very thin, I've had no problems with mine over two and a half years. A friend of mine has had theirs replaced twice in the same time frame, but they aren't half rough with it! (And everything else they own, for that matter.) I guess it's how you treat it - my MacBook rarely leaves the desk.

Man survives death march to display-on-a-chip

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I enjoyed it. Nothing wrong with the occasional magazine piece! Who says it all has to be the latest news?

Army officer tossed laptops into the sea


Intelligence officer?

This must be some new meaning of the word 'intelligence' that I'm not familiar with.

Meet Phorm's PR genius

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This "British jobs" thing is nonsense. I doubt they'd ever employ many people in the UK.

Plus, Phorm's programmers are in Russia, right? I don't have a problem with that, but making out like Phorm is going to cause a dip in the unemployment figures is nonsense.

Pudsey Bear refused UK passport


Ian R is right

The UKDPS is a private company trying to look like a government department.

There is no register of names, or a central name-change department.

It's a piece of paper you can print yourself, and it's just as legal as getting one from a lawyer or the UKDPS site. (They won't tell you that, of course - that's how they make their money!)

How do I know this? I did it! And the passport, driving licence, banks, etc - all accepted without a problem.

ACT backs Microsoft in Brussels' IE legal spat


Firefox nudging IE on market share

Whose figures are these? According to...


...whose stats match those of all the sites I manage, IE has about three times the market share of Firefox.

I wish it weren't true, I really do...

HP ScanJet 3C takes lead on Bohemian Rhapsody


This just made my day!

This is what I was hoping for from the article about the music made by old computer sounds a month or so ago (that used samples, bah!). This is hardcore!

Microsoft to offer Windows 7 downgrade to XP


Windows 1995?

I'm sure it was called "Windows Nineteen-Ninety-Five", or something...

Developers more 'satisfied' with PHP than other codes


Re: So far no one has spoken up for PHP

There's always one annoying git who refers to PHP by it's original name, "Personal Home Page". That was ten years ago, or something! You have to admit, it has grown just a touch since then?

Government wastes £4.6m on mobile telly nonsense

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Well done Bill Ray

I love this sort of journalism, this sort of misuse of government funds needs to be exposed. Do you moonlight for Private Eye at all?

Did they get three quotes and pick the cheapest, I wonder?

Cuba crafts extra-communist Linux distro


More silly names...

How about MARiX, or my favourite, Lenix?

Copyright cops launch MS-happy software compliance tool


"Over-licensed" - sounds like a sales pitch to me

Like the sign at the exit at Costco which insists they're checking your receipt against your trolley so that "you've received all the items you've paid for". It's not to stop you nicking anything, oh no...

Firefox's Fennec trots onto Windows Mobile



What an awful name. It sounds like something my girlfriend would sprinkle on pasta.

Oz man collared with pigeons down trousers


I mis-read the title...

...as "O2 man collared with pigeons down trousers". I thought it was going to explain why international texts often take days to arrive...

BBC pumps 60 quid a head into Gaelic

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Statistics or damn lies?

No channel just says "we have X000 viewers" - the figure is meaningless! How many viewers does each programme get, that's the important figure. Do they get 200,000 constantly? No, of course not - as Bill Ray points out, that's probably just the figure for the football, I'd be surprised if the rest of the output had even 50,000 viewers.

The government massaging the figures? Surely not!

Wrong kind of winter brings England to a halt

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Great article!

Made me laugh.

It's true what the Northerners are saying though - Hull was underwater for months and nobody even noticed!

Microsoft says it again - no second beta for Windows 7


I loved the beta!


Council fields world's first rubbish-fuelled rubbish truck

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Bwa ha ha!

Great caption for the first photo... so you've been to the Cleckhuddersfax Triangle, then?

'Bart Simpson' punts Church of Scientology


The Simpsons has been crap for years

Since the turn of the century the Simpsons has been pretty poor, and getting poorer as far as I can see. Kill the whole programme off!

Extreme pron vigilantes are after you

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Come on, it's obviously satire!

That stuff about "media trials can be just as effective as court ones" and links to Tor, it's obviously satire.

That TFL "watchful eyes" poster made me stare agape at the screen for a minute... is that real? That's terrifying.

Microsoft to act on IE8 'show stoppers'


At least they're trying!

I'm no MS fanboi, but at least they're giving it a shot. With a bit of luck within a year or two, IE7 and especially 6 will be gone or almost gone, and that will mean that my headache will have gone too.

Channel 9! Buono estente.

Kiwi finds US military secrets on 'MP3 player'


I'd have opened it

So what if it says "Do Not Enter - Government Property" etc. Who says? Was it just the name of a folder? How do you know it was genuine and not someone trying to stop his mum seeing his porn stash? He had bought it at second-hand after all. How about I write "Do not read below this line or you will go to prison, signed B Obama" will you follow my instructions? Step away from your PC! Etc. etc.

Open source anti-Semitic as well as communist shock



Are the secret Zionist overlords afraid of Bill Ray?

Microsoft Songsmith ad trumps Seinfeld shocker

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Dreadful advert...

...wonderful remixes! Absolutely hilarious, and quite interesting to see what Songsmith makes of these famous vocals.

Accusations fly as another Nominet director quits


I won't miss him

I never liked Garfield anyway.

Opera sings praises of Microsoft-browser statement


I'm sure you're all missing the point

Microsoft sells most copies of Windows to PC manufacturers, not end-users. The ruling has to do with MS insisting that IE be pre-installed along with Windows, instead of the PC manufacturer having the freedom to choose any browser. (For an end-user to buy Windows with IE and WMP included free I don't think is a problem legally.)

Also, I think the reason why it doesn't apply to Apple is because they're in a different market - Apple are a hardware company not a software company. So Apple aren't selling their OS to PC manufacturers and saying "you have to install IE and WMP as well", they're selling to end-users who have the freedom to choose to buy a PC from a different company.

Chipmaker leak points to iPhone Nano in June


In Communist China...

...iPhone Nano takes out two year contract on YOU!

Samsung boffins demo transparent OLED screen


The see-through screen...

...has an interesting choice of video on it!

Perhaps they could be used as a sex aid, fitted as the lenses of glasses?

Microsoft disables automatic IE 8 downloads


Pity the poor average PC user...

Most people with widescreen TVs are happy to watch with the picture squished and black bars at the top and bottom because they haven't set up their set-top box and don't understand the concept anyway... what chance does the man in the street have with figuring this one out?!

Safari enjoys 'unusually residential' December boost



...the figures do suggest increased Mac OS usage:


Where has Webster gone, anyway? Or is he just posting anonymously nowadays?

Steve Jobs dismisses death rumours


Tones of government

I've got nothing against Steve & Co., but Apple's speech of "unwavering support" etc. sounds to me to be just like the sort of thing pushed out by the politburo of some Stalinist regime to cover up the fact that the general secretary hasn't been seen in public for months...

Not that I'm comparing the two, you understand. I love Apple and pledge my allegiance to the Party and fathercompany.

iPlayer finally makes friendly with Mac and Linux


Come on whingers!

It's not that bad. They had to use someone's technology, after all! Even the BBC Micro was bought in from Acorn, remember?

I've tried the iPlayer downloads and found it rather nice, so far. A few things need fixing here and there, but it is only a beta at the moment, after all.

ecademy exposes customer emails to world+dog


Same old lines trotted out

How many times do we hear "we treat the privacy of our members as a top priority" immediately after a gaffe like this?

Latest Firefox beta gets touchy on Mac


And surely...

Swipe up should move to the bottom of the page - you're swiping it up so should see the bottom. And vice versa. C'est nes pas?

The Mother of All Demos — 150 years ahead of its time


What's with all the haterz today?

I enjoyed reading it, Cade.

Leeds Council loses kids details


So the employee lied too?

“The loss was immediately reported by the employee concerned ... it was understood that no sensitive or confidential data was on this stick, so no further action was taken. ...once recovered, it became apparent the memory stick did have sensitive information on it that should not have been there."

So the council employee lied to cover up their fecklessness and disregard for peoples privacy and the law? Surely that's a fireable offence.

Entire class fails IT exam by submitting in Word format


I think you should all apologise to Tim Parker...

...and I want your submissions as REM statements saved on audio cassette from a ZX81.

EU asks Google for privacy advice


Only one pig?

I think you'll find it was a whole herd of pigs.

Their nephews are all monkeys, too.

Lapland New Forest website suffers 'unusual technical problems'


Website stuff amiss

Strangely, the website isn't working 100% now...

www.laplandnewforest.co.uk points to a UK-Reg holding page, whereas laplandnewforest.co.uk (without the www) points to the site!

I must say I've chortled merrily at some of the photos - especially the nativity scene - though I dare say it was much less funny to those who visited.

New terror guidelines on photography



Taking photos in public has to be a right we have, surely. People were arrested in East Berlin for taking photographs in the wrong part of town, let's not go down that road.

They're not all bad though, the rozzers. While filming in the grounds of a derelict school last year, we were approached by two policemen. We were worried that they would ask us to leave, but instead they just warned us to be careful that the pikies who were regularly stripping the school clean of scrap metal didn't take a shine to our camera!

Boss frogmarches bound employee to cop shop


@ EvilJason

You're not so evil you know. It's good to know that some of us still believe in the rule of law!

Perhaps the rest of you would prefer life in Saudi Arabia?

Sirius satellite radio squashes 6-year-old bug


Sky used to have a similar flaw

Back in the analogue days, we cancelled our subscription, and they told you what day it was due to go off. As long as you had the receiver turned off on that day, it wouldn't receive the signal to cancel the card and hey presto, free Sky! It worked for about six months before finally blocking us out.

The whole system relied on people turning on their receiver to see if they'd been cut off!

China slams Guns N' Roses album


I'm no Guns N Roses fan...

...in fact I can't stand them, but the Chinese government has really proved the band right as regards the theme of this album, haven't they?

World hunts CherryPal cloud PC chimera


Just like the good old days

CherryPal seem to have taken a leaf out of Sinclair Research's book... QL, anyone?

BNP membership list leaks online


@ Jason LoCascio, and others

Firstly, I believe some jobs ban membership of ANY political party - such as the police, for example. Surely they should be officially apolitical, otherwise what's to stop them giving mason-like favours to those with the party card in their wallet?

Secondly, if a policeman or judge were a member of the BNP, wouldn't he be more likely to arrest or convict non-whites? So in my opinion, people's politics does sometimes affect their ability to do their jobs.