Utter tosh
Perhaps someone at El Reg who does not think that JavaScript is 'an annoying scripting language with aspirations of objecthood' should have attempted this task. This article seems to be a bitter stab at what the author considers a weak language, rather than an insight into builidng iPhone apps.
Having read to the end, it is clear that the author is unwilling or incapable of learning what is in-fact a very powerful language. I've not yet written an iPhone app, but if I did, I'm sure I would not need to use iFrames in my HTML markup, nor worry about page onload events, or the XmlHttpRequestObject. I'd use one of the popular JavaScript frameworks to do the plumbing - JQuery, Prototype, Dojo, and get rid of those global variables and functions.. maybe even use objects.
Bill. Stick to being a journalist. You're clearly not a developer. Mind you, based on this article, I'm not sure which you are worse at