Posts by Pyros

Black widows: Coming soon to a kitchen sink near you

Starlings?

Can we send you grackles and rock doves by the boatloads, then? They're sorta like starlings, only wimpier (and messier.)

No mile-high pr0n for Delta passengers

Even worse

No mile-high WoW raids within The Nexus on your flying mount!

I've always wanted to be the first on my server to mile-high raid.

US cybersecurity shake up would give prez more control

Rudderless?

It's got a captain in adult nappies with a crayon-scrawled "letter of marquis" clutched in his hand!

Rudderless is the only way THAT ship won't sail straight--now if we can just get rid of his sails and masts...

Senators push for restrictions on laptop searches

Hrmm...

Please read the BOFH article, "Remote Access Malarky" for my thought on the "probable cause" POV.

Israeli hamlet plans DNA database for dog poop

Oy.

I already have to walk the black Lab most mornings and pick up her "doggy chocolate" (in orange or mint "flavor",) so BBC, that's the last thing *I* need to see on your site.

Still, I do like their initiative--now if we can organize a neighborhood setup like that down *here*...

Chrysler plans electric car production model

I'll just wait...

...until Chrysler actually makes an electric pickup the size and power of a Dodge Ram.

Or at least a Jeep Safari. That'd be a huge help in Colorado.

Rogue SF sysadmin may cost city over $1m

Why am I reminded...

...of the Despair, Inc. demovitational: "If you're not part of the solution, there's always good money in prolonging the problem."

Big and bendy e-ink displays on way

Inquring minds...

...want to know is it waterproof?

(As an aside, I'd buy one once it can do a proper RGB/CYMK color display.)

Taiwanese firm to sue over armed raid at IFA

See?

"Teco claims custom agents ignored their explanations that the sets didn't even have DVD functions before hauling the gear away."

I bet the local German polizei is a bit lacking in funding this quarter, so they're looking for "contaband" to help prop their budgets up some. >)

Prototype orbital seaplane in Texan blimp-base blast

Huh?

When I read this line:

"the refueling process will cause the vehicles to rotate into the vertical attitude, avoiding the typically used vehicle erection equipment"

my first thought was, based on the piccy, was: Huh? It's *already* erect!

Mine's the one in the gutter.

EU parliament says yes to hydrogen cars

Missing the point

To be honest... wouldn't it be better to go one step further and make fuel out of waste material? Biofuels are looking more and more attractive, with newer technologies in development, such as algal filtration.

Besides, hydrogen is pretty inefficent, requiring almost as much to make it as to use it.

Getac B300 rugged laptop

Hrmm...

I've fooled around with a Panasonic Toughbook before, so I know where I'm coming from when I say that you'll want to not bother with the optionals except for the second battery. Laptops just *love* to suck the life out of your batteries.

Take it or leave it; it's just too expensive compared to a 900$ Toughbook.

Customs raids tech trade show

Actually...

Think they're just there to score free tat at the booth owner's expense, using "copyright infringement" as a convienent excuse?

Mine's the one with the SPIE's Defense & Security Synopsium exhibit pass on the security officer's jacket...

Icahn Yahoo! writes! a! letter!

Joke here

To he honest... Ichan't see any difference between Ichan's letter and this one. Perhaps Ichan't do without caffine today?

Okay, okay... coat->door->taxi->

Clay minerals point to vast Martian lakes

There, there...

Calm down, Mr. Pimpare. We believe you. In fact, I believe there are two fine reporters in that room over there. You can tell 'em everything that you've said here, and they'll make sure the right people hear the right words.

They'll be the ones in the sharp-looking black suits. Don't mind their habit of wearing sunglasses indoors--they've been spending their time indoors for quite a bit.

Former Samsung boss receives suspended jail term

Huh.

Unlike the US's metaphor, the won doesn't stop in prison...

Okay, back to seriousness!

Grissom bows out of CSI

Bye, Grissom.

May you have more fun with your bugs now.

I wasn't aware that Warrick's dead--but then again, we never really did see the new episodes very much. Oh well, here's to the new guy--may he continue the wierd geeky-type trend.

British drivers face jail for causing death by dangerous driving

@Pierre

So... just to catch 'em all, we should make a new law about capital crimes for carelessly making new laws at the drop of a hat?

We might catch Mr. Brown-is-the-color-of-my-pants with his trousers down and send him to a place where pants might be optional!

Court advisor says poem list infringed database right

@Chris Cox

Hey, he did submit a new term--never heard of "shifting the dockyarder" before until now!

Mine's the one made of two-ply.

Google releases serialization scheme

I just realized something...

Amanfrommars' wording comes across very strongly of a rather robust Eliza bot--but with a twist: there's actual external user input involved, between the initial assessment and output methods.

Namely, someone's at the helm and is cherry-picking Amanfrommars' topics of choice to comment on.

The choice of wording is still peculiar, but that's not hard to hardwire into an Eliza's runcode.

Home Office unveils tagtastic immigrant control plans

So...

Are we gonna see any nature shows about the lifecycle of illegal immigrants? I mean, if we're gonna tag them, we might as well do a hidden-cam reality show for it!

Mine's the one with a DVD copy of "Mexican Manor: Season 1" in it...

SanDisk touts read-only SD cards for sensitive data

So...

They've never heard of the BOfH's greatest contribution to media-storage: WORN technology?

Write Once, Read Never.

Oz censor, gamers fall out over Fallout 3 ban

Wow...

Perhaps they should ban BioShock, since you have to inject EVE directly into your veins like actual hard drugs?

Oh, wait. EVE is fictional. That makes it ALLLLLLL better. <sarcasm=off>

They need to sit down and understand the game, not just read the damned labels.

Blears pitches prize draws and online polls at young votes

Stickers?

"Anyone with young children knows that a “sticker chart” can be highly effective in persuading junior to stop turning up his nose at greens, stay in bed after 4.30am and stop pissing all over the duvet."

But it didn't stop me from getting into the fireplace and needing a bath afterwards. (True story. Being deaf meant that this happened far more often that I'd recall--and I still recall *none* of it, thankfully.)

Smut pop-up teacher retrial stuck in delay loop

Wait, AC...

"and prosecutors that (let's remember) who passed the Connecticut bar exam, one of the easier in the country (it's a good fallback for law school graduates who think it may take a few tries to pass the New York bar exam.)"

I thought Florida was easier? (I mean, we actually passed Jack " Rabid Anti-Game"Thompson through the Florida Bar before he went psychotic.)

Jacqui Smith kick-starts yoof ID debate site, site kick stops

@Kain Preacher

Here's some backup from Florida: http://www.flhsmv.gov/html/dlnew.html

I never even knew about this bit. Now I know why I have to get my driver's licence out at the airport. :P

Google and the End of Science

Anderson is a bit like a mole

Always digging around for tasty grubs and can't see worth a penny.

He's forgtten that we'd no sooner toss the scientific method out than willingly put out our own two eyes--because it has fundamentally proven itself consitent over the years. Even multiversal aliens will develop the same method in their own timeframe, despite (possibly) different sensory inputs/dimensions.

Magnus is correct about data--Google data is only useful in datamining. We present a theory, we run some numbers, and then let the compy number-crunch trillons of bits that would've taken us at most several *years* in physical space to come up with *some* result. Then we look at the end product, arbitrate whether or not it fits the theory, and do a little detailed back-checking.

In the end, *we* decide if a theory is valid. Not Google. Or Anderson, for that matter.

(Hume, though, is a perfectly good fellow and has plenty of good points.)

Mio announces Knight Rider satnav

I'm still waiting...

...for the one with a nice feminine contralto.

(I have a female truck.)

NASA firms up space shuttle launch manifest

But...

...what will they do with the shuttles when they finally go into retirement?

I hope I can score one and renovate it as the ultimate geeky US home. Now how do I transport the whole friggin' thing to the house site...?

Microsoft pledges to fight Vista 'myths'

Suddenly I'm reminded...

...of that first prison scene in "Hancock."

Extra credit if you can tell who's who in what position.

Trousers Brown: Blighty faces 'food security' threat

Thoughts...

There's still plenty of hurdles regarding food security--but I agree that some policies need to stop limiting these things.

I mean, that business with not culling badgers before they go nuts on valuable dairy cows? We have a policy here in Florida that says that if a gator gets too comfty with the idea of humans not being a threat, it needs a round into its thick skull. The idea is to *encourage* them not to be stupid and take the "easy food" (ie pet dogs. Especially on the leash.)

I really do have sympathy for those in the UK. Why not use the London Undergound for shipping? You can displace a single car for local deliveries--less fuel and more people walking for a change!

Inside man in failed £72m electronic heist jailed

Pffth.

He looked like he withdrew money from ONE account. Silly banker--in for seven and a half years. (Yes, I counted.)

If I was in position, I'd do a driftnet scheme over savings accounts. Do the math, and you'll find that you'll get a less than a cent past the first .00$. Now multiply that extra fragmentary change by, let's say, 10,000 accounts. You'll get a value at hundreds, but done over a sucession of months... that also adds up.

The question remains is how to funnel that fragmentary change into someplace secure.

America wakes up to the surveillance society

@Kevin Kitts

If it was only that easy. You're preaching to, what, 1/5,000th of the US people total?

I'm not saying that you should give up--far from it. But it takes a realist to know that at large the US people just want to tell the gov to leave them alone and get on with their lives.

Apathic, really. *shakes head sadly*

Boozers rejoice - it's the USB wine tap!

Aw...

I was hoping for the one that delivered beer to your desk!

Imagine the "intellectual copyright" battles the brewmakers would get into, however. Richard Stallman would become a legendary figure in THAT arena, I tell you!

Mine's the one with the code for Landshark on a CD in its inner pocket, thanks.

Nvidia throws itself under the bus with chip defect, delays and lost sales

@Thought About IT

"I've got an NVidia GeForce 7900 GTX in my tower system, and its fan screams at top speed whenever Vista awakes from sleep mode. The only way to shut it up is a reboot. NVidia have known about this problem for over 12 months, but don't seem capable of fixing it, so I'm not surprised they're in trouble."

Not suprising it does that--quit running Vista, since the 7 series were designed deep in the XP era. I've got a 7800 myself, on a good XP machine, and it *defintely* doen't make a huge amount of noise. (I have like 5-6 hooked up in it for max cooling and nice glowy effects. Need to kill the blue one, though--that came with the power supply...)

I'm also hearing impaired, so that could be a factor, too...

The Moderatrix will see you now

Hrmm...

What is the Moderatix's opinion regarding the legendary Internet Oracle?

http://cgi.cs.indiana.edu/~oracle/index.cgi

Some culinary advice

What goes well with fresh alligator? (Paynes Prarie is doing its usual seasonal flooding, and I accidentally ran over one of its locals on my way to my relatives in Gainesville, FL.)

Your gator-hide chaps will be in the mail once they cure properly.

$5.8m payout draws line under FBI's anthrax screw-up

re: US Military Psychop

"A single rogue employee perhaps could have done it, or an agent of a foreign power doing a psychop but that doesn't explain the coordinated targetting of Dr Hatfill, and certainly doesn't explain why President Bush increased it's budget the following year"

Pfffh. This is easy to explain: Monkey nature. We fear what we don't know.

The FBI was targetting Hatfill as a scapegoat, to cover their blue babboon arses in a mad scramble to suppress their monkey fears, nevermind the issue of deployment/cultivation.

Curious George Bush is just a shaved monkey--he's easily led by his monkey fear and the Big Red Phone on his desk, if someone whispers in his ears long enough.

Sony touts weird multi-sensor handheld gadget tech

We already have tactile pads

It's called a Nintendo DS.

Yes, I know about the stylus, but one of the earliest games let you switch weapons with your thumb on the lower screen.

Let air passengers smoke dope, say Denver potheads

I've been to Denver Intl many times...

...and believe me, it's still a *huge* upgrade from the old Stapleton-Denver Airport!

The upper floors are worth the tram issues, including the food courts.

Now let's see if you like Milan's Terminal 5... >)

( re: Adrian--they painted over those roughly a month after the unveiling. You won't find them in Denver Intl anywhere now.)

Hrmm...

I'm thinking it'll work a little differently--it'd be like a Crown Club lounge, only with security precautions. Basically, it might go like this...

1) Passenger declares to security both dope and medical pass-of-note from certified doctor, officer checks the amount of dope to ensure that there's enought for, say, 2-3 smokes. (Pre-wrapped even better.) Security then hands passenger a ticket for passage and asks the passenger not to light up on the plane, due to saftey regulations.

2) Passenger then heads to the Ganja Lounge, gets checked in with both medical pass-of-note and security ticket, and heads in for a light.

3) Passenger then doesn't care enough to board plane.

Tennis sites hit by drive-by download attacks

@AC

Good for him! It beats being British, with Heathrow T5 and the CCTV peeping and all, y'know...

get(coat);

goto(door);

hail(taxt);

FCC preps puritanical broadband

Puritanical? Bah!

They just don't want anyone else to access their porn sessions over the free wi-fi.

Yes! It's the Knight Rider satnav!

Voice Options

And can we swap the voice module to a nice feminine contralto? I have a female truck, y'see.

Daewoo's laptop is child's play – literally

But!

But, is it ToughBook quality?

Remember, the trogs may attempt to hit each other with them. Wouldn't want to damage the sensitives inside, forcing the parents to buy a new one in expaseration every week! (Or every day, if some tales of certain schools are anything to go by.)

Social networks may be imaginary

@Matthew Ellen

No kidding--bonbos are the only other primate that I know of that actually *enjoys* the act of procreation!

Chimps are better at social networking, though. The problem is that we seem to outsource to orangutangs pretty most of the time.

I only subscribe to...

...the MonkeySphere theory of social networking.

I mean, I know, oh, 20 monkeys--most of the time they're in pirate outfits and named Bob, that's part of the theory explaination don't ask--and if I see any more monkeys, they're pretty much strangers. Yet one of my monkeys may know THAT monkey as one of his 20 monkeys, and so on... You get the idea?

But hey, we're all monkeys in pirate suits and named Bob--it's a matter of which boat we're sailing on, anyways.

Sweden ushers in bugging for all

@Nick

Nope, no problem at all.

You will, of course, need to have your pants down beforehand before you make any call to anyone in Sweden.

Roomba robot maker to build DARPA squidge-droids

A proctologist's best friend...

Okay, okay, I'm getting my coat now...

Gamers love in-game ads, ad industry-sponsored survey reveals

The only way this would work...

...is if the ads in question was made to *go* with the theme in general.

Let's say we choose BioShock. The ads already in it--which are very specific to the Art Deco 50's/60's feel--are a prime example for any real life ads that get inserted in it. The submersion is critical to a game--I don't want to see a glaring Matrix-like ad incongruiously placed among the classic smoke/plasmids ads there. The art team should do the design & placement for the ads themselves--they know the style and how not to disrupt the play, merely allowing the player to note the ad and perhaps admire it a bit after whatever was demanding their attention.

Am I getting this through you, or do I need to place bilboards in Spore for you?