* Posts by Dennis Price

45 publicly visible posts • joined 8 Mar 2007

First SMS Trojan for Android is in the wild

Dennis Price


Go Blackberry!

Sent from my Verizon Blackberry

Phonemakers cry foul on Steve Jobs 'We're all alike' attack

Dennis Price

re: BB Storm

Granted the first BB Storm had issues, I do know some with it that are pretty happy with them anyway.

However the BB Storm2 is the best smartphone I've ever had - especially the touch-click input. No dropped calls and I now get a 3G signal in my bathroom. lol

We may be quiet, but we're out there and just don't have anything to bitch about.

But don't go around talking smack about our Blackberries.

Just happy to be here and enjoying the popcorn...


Dear Obama: Please consider open-source a waste of your time

Dennis Price
Black Helicopters

Ya'll can write letters to the Dalibama all you want......

...I'm building a fort.....

Black helicopters because I just wasted two days of my life reading The .Plan...or the Stimulous... or the Recovery... whatever it's called.... and judging by all the bread and circuses - that letter might just work....

<heavy sigh>

Memo to US Secret Service: Net proxy may pinpoint Palin email hackers

Dennis Price
Paris Hilton

Conspiracy Theories be Damned!

I know of several government agencies here in the US that use Comcast email... dot.gov nothing... comcast.net

Much ado about nothing.

Paris because the new icons suck.

Swedish men left frustrated by state sex aid policy

Dennis Price
Dead Vulture


Are you sure about that? What about when the female version of Winston Churchill walks in the door and "pays her money"?

gaaack.... just about puked imagining that one up.....

Google maps Russian assault on Savannah

Dennis Price
Paris Hilton

Just figured "Jim" out....

.... and he has very large fat fingers..... he's an McAmerican. (who didn't get the War of Northern Aggression reference)

Go figure, eh?

Paris, cuz she doesn't like fat chicks... or guys for that matter.


Dennis Price
Black Helicopters

re: Jim

Sending the black helos now..... your electronics will be removed from your house, your fingers will be broken, and your electicity turned off.

You Sir, are an embarrassment to The South and will be dealt with... (probably sent back North where he evidently immigrated from...).

Should have been Paris.... a genius compared to this guy....

Japan kicks off electric car format war

Dennis Price
Paris Hilton

Re: Re: I call Bullshiite!

A Pontiac Vibe (with the Raider Package) is a re-badged Toyota Matrix. It will kick the ass of those beloved Mini's ya'll are so proud of. Mileage and performance.

The Vibe Raider is *not* a butt plug!

Paris. Because she likes Pontiac Vibe Raiders.....

Dennis Price

I call Bullshiite!

I see more and more of those Toyota "Pius" cars on the road and I laugh my ass off at the sheeple driving them. Just the other day I saw a stereotype driving a Pius, complete with beard, wife, 1.2 children, Obama sticker, and "If you're not outraged, your not paying attention" sticker - didn't like it when I looked him dead in the eye while I was passing and laughed. Actually tred to catch up to me...didn't work in my 06 Pontiac Vibe (38 mpg).

Why? 41mpg that's why. An 1984 Chevy Sprint (percursor to the Geo Metro) got 48-50+ mpg waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back then and now your telling me that with all the technology in the Pius it can't beat that? Betcha the "carbon footprint" is a hell of a lot bigger on the Pius too.

Btw: GM is also testing hydrogen SUV's as well as the Volt.

Nvidia throws itself under the bus with chip defect, delays and lost sales

Dennis Price
Thumb Down

That's odd....

...I *just* worked on a Dell XPS laptop yesterday with the Nvidia 7900 Go video chipset. The video is failing... all kinds of artifacts on the bios screen and XP will load but not display unless it's in VGA mode....

Got to call India... I mean Dell today.

Sigh.... sure would be nice to know what chipsets are affected... bastards...

Microsoft Patch Tuesday promises seven fixes

Dennis Price
Paris Hilton

Paris has underwear?

...yeah, I work on Windows networks... so what? I know what's lacking at Microsoft..

Paris, because she doesn't own underwear....

Retailers risk libel nightmare over 'no-work' database

Dennis Price
Dead Vulture

*Disclosure: Mireskandari is retained by The Register.

Lordy... I remember when El Reg didn't have two pennies to rub together (what was Drew and Lester's other other site? The Rock or something?).... and now they have lawyers retained?


Thinking about it, I guess so. With all the "skip this ad" and pages going with MS, HP, Dell, etc colors depending on the ad, I reckon they would need lawyers and have the wherewithall to pay for them... sad commentary really. Bet they drink import beer now.


At least I still have my Vulture pin from back when El Reg did bullshiite contests... just memories now...

US Army cyber colonel in call to network arms

Dennis Price
Paris Hilton

well hell...

I don't even understand wtf he's saying an ah is frum heyar.... He damn sure doesn't need to be in charge of cyber-anything. Reminds me of an Lt. we had in the Army back in the 80's, he was supposed to be an Army photographer but ended up "commanding" a platoon of M1 Abrams tanks - fucking worthless with glasses an half inch thick. Couldn't see a damn thing.

Not too smart but now you understand the right way, the wrong way, and the Army way.

On a side note, I have you British bastards figured out now:


Paris, because she and the Colonel understand each other....

US allows visual inspections of nipple rings

Dennis Price

@James Bassett

The whole story isn't here - the chick passed the main metal detector, she was hit up for the "random" secondary metal detection wand"ing".

And not only was that not mentioned, she has the legendary ambulance chaser Gloria Allred for her representation.

That should be fun since Allred is "outraged" (I swear people (polititions/lawyers are not people) don't understand the real meaning of the word... sigh)....

And I'm out....

Big cheeses rolled into Vista-Incapable lawsuit

Dennis Price
Gates Horns


As much as I'd like to join that lawsuit (any lawsuit - might as well get some extra cash for sitting on my ass... as much as I bitch about lawyers, they seem inevitable), I cannot.

Why? Simply because when I bought my last laptop in Nov 06 (with the coveted Vista Home Super Badazz upgrade promise lol), I got a Gateway with dual core AMD Turion yada yada, 160GB hd, 17" screen, and 2GB's of ram for $850. Upgraded to Vista Business once MS sent it out to folks in the Partner program and have been happy ever since.

I don't agree with that lawsuit anyway - why the hell would you buy some cheapass laptop with minimum specs and expect a new OS to run properly on it? A little bit of research would have shown anyone the light about Vista - XP Pro was a resource pig when it came out compared to Win2k, why would Vista be any different? Damn sheep and their ambulance-chasing lawyers...

As an aside, know how to test any given laptop with the proper specs for the job? The Twist Test. Grab any laptop and with the lid open, twist the front two corners. If it flexes, you have a broken/cracked motherboard in your future because the damn case is too flimsy (had some EMT/paramedics kill a bunch of Acers that way). Too many manufacturers go cheap and laptop designs change even from model to model from the same system builder.

And that's my rambling good deed for the day. Take it for what it's worth.

Nokia passes buck over Greenpeace eco rating reduction

Dennis Price
Gates Horns

Screw Greenpeace

WTF does anyone care about a bunch for eco-terrorists?

Why the hell would El Reg give a great shiite? Slow news day?

Why not something about why my Vista Business SP1 install went fucking crazy with unending reboots? And why it "took" only after getting a Windows Defender update? Huh? Huh?

Yeah, I'm tweaked today.

(Evil Bill because today he's a bastard in my opinion)

New York's Freedom Tower to depend on RFID

Dennis Price

@Tom Willis Re: Anonymous Poon

The Euros were responsible for importing slaves into the new world.


"Beginning at least as early as 1502, European slave traders shipped approximately 11 to 16 million slaves to the Americas, including 500,000 to what is now the United States. By the beginning of the eighteenth century, slaves could be found in every area colonized by Europeans.

Initially, English colonists relied on indentured white servants, but by the late seventeenth century, faced with a shortage of servants, they increasingly resorted to enslaved Africans. Three distinctive systems of slavery emerged in the American colonies. In Maryland and Virginia, slavery was widely used in raising tobacco and corn and worked under the "gang" system. In the South Carolina and Georgia low country, slaves raised rice and indigo, worked under the "task" system, and were able to reconstitute African social patterns and maintain a separate Gullah dialect. In the North, slavery was concentrated on Long Island and in southern Rhode Island and New Jersey, where most slaves were engaged in farming and stock raising for the West Indies or were household servants for the urban elite.

The American Revolution had contradictory consequences for slavery. Thousands of slaves freed themselves by running away. In the South, slavery became more firmly entrenched, and expanded rapidly into the Old Southwest after the development of the cotton gin. In the North, in contrast, every state freed slaves by statute, court decision, or enactment of gradual emancipation schemes.

During the decades before the Civil War, slave grown cotton accounted for over half the value of all United States exports, and provided virtually all the cotton used in the northern textile industry and 70 percent of the cotton used in British mills. The slave South failed to establish commercial, financial, or manufacturing companies on the same scale as the North."

Get your facts straight, Anon Poon!

(hell, you Brits were drug runners too - re: The Chinese Opium War - thus your hands are dirty (worse than America's, especially before the sun had set on the Brittish Empire.)

Caution - FBI fit-ups of Muslim patsies in progress

Dennis Price
Paris Hilton

WTF El Reg?

‘Caution - FBI fit-ups of Muslim patsies in progress’

I stared and stared at this title for a couple of minutes wondering wtf does that mean? Does "fit-up" mean setup? As in the FBI is setting up muslim patsies? Had to click on the damn story just to find out.

Evidently I need a Brit translator.... and I've been reading El Reg for years with no translation issues.

Paris because she doesn't know what's going on either...


US gov now says Eye-o-Sauron™ border masts are crap

Dennis Price
Black Helicopters

re: Americans

"There was something about the use of the word "American" to describe the colonistas using hi-tech to keep out the natives that just got my gall."

This is why liberals should be sent to remedial history/reality classes. You have two classes of citizens in Mexico, Mexicans and Indians. Mexicans treat their native Indians like crap - you think Americans are harsh? Not even close. Not even in the same ballpark as the Mexican government and it's policies toward "natives".


@Dick Emery: Baaa Baaa Baaa! Ba Ba Ba Baaaaaaaaaa!

(for those who don't understand sheep, here is the translation for you...)

Those "shitty" jobs used to be done by teenagers and non-high school graduates who can't get those jobs now because they are being "outsourced" to countries who can't/won't support their own people. Why the fuck can't people blame the source of the problem (i.e. Mexico's government) and not fall back on the "Blame America First" ideology is beyond me - too damn lazy and morally corrupt I guess.

Windows Vista Ultimate SP1 delayed

Dennis Price

@Simon Rossi re: UK English language pack

I hate seeing "colour", "that funky 'L'" (some kinda money lol), etc etc...

KInda petty, don't you think? I put up with it here at El Reg because it's a Brit website, I'll get by, day by day, and try not to kill myself over it. No biggie.

I suppose I could whine because I get errors that say:

"Fatal System Error"

instead of "Ain't no point in beatin' a dead horse...'course, can't hurt none either" or


instead of "That dog ain't gonna hunt"


The camo field jacket that smells like cordite......

US cruiser nails crippled spy-sat on first shot

Dennis Price

All of you are dead wrong

And you should be thanking ole President Bush.....

That was *not* a satellite - it was L. Ron coming back from Xenu.

Take that CoS!

In your FACE, Tom Cruise!

<giggles hysterically>

Do we need computer competence tests?

Dennis Price
Paris Hilton

Heh.. my dear old dad....

... claims that the Government (Capital G) never should have let the public have personal computers. He has his points but overall I think he's wrong - never stops him from asking me to look something up on the net. Cracks me up.

About the "bottom feeders of IT", the tech support types - I was one once upon a time and used to fantasize about black helicopters landing and removing every piece of electronics (even down to the time blinking vcr's), breaking the consumer's little fingers, and never, ever, be able to access the net ever again.

Fun stuff to think about while on the phone with a total idiot bitching about why nobody ever TOLD him about using AV software and why it doesn't "do it automagically".... what ever "it" is that it does... sigh.

People ask why I don't do residential call outs instead of just business clients - I simply don't have time for folks who believe that if they pay you once, it should come with unlimited lifetime support for their machine...

Paris icon because endusers and Paris have something in common - both have no sense and something infecting their "workstations"

Germans send teen tearaway to Siberia

Dennis Price
Thumb Up

@Peter Flynn

"Where is the IT angle on this?"

The IT angle is there-is-none.... ever.


Gates' spontaneity highlights IE data gap

Dennis Price
Jobs Horns

Re: Anonymous Coward

Who is the moron? I get $90 an hour to deal with business networks and business end users. With Microsoft I can install the program, make sure it has its updates and I'm out, with Linux, it's fuck with this , fuck with that, fuck with another thing and I'm still there trying to train the enduser to use the damn thing. I have better things to do (family, family family) since I don't have to work full time to live comfortably with my *family*.

The true and absolute moron is the *enduser*, not me. And the *enduser* is the reason you have a job, not Microsoft or anyone else's products.

RE: Drew. Until I looked up what Steve Jobs looks like *now*, I thought that was Ballmer - I still see in my mind's eye the Steve Jobs from the 80's. lmao.

Dennis Price
Paris Hilton

You never know....

I'm running Vista Business, IE7, and Office 2007 - - and had installed Frontpage 2003 for doing quick and dirty webpages. Had started on a new website project when I wondered where the hell was Frontpage 2007?

After a quick search I found Microsoft had renamed Frontpage to "Expression Web" and I had the damn software in the same action pack that my Vista and Office 2007 came in.


(fuck all you Linux freaks out there - my software is free or mostly so - for $299 a year, I get all the damn MS titles without having to dick around with how I want my OS to "Look and Feel" - it just *works*)

Oh yeah - to The Reg folks - why isn't there a Steve Jobs Angel/Devil icon? Fuck Mr. Mac/ipod/iPhone too!

Global warming not to blame for warmer North Pole?

Dennis Price
Dead Vulture


Those same climate models can't predict what has already happened in the past - good shiite there.

Mars is warming up too - damn those probes! Damn Americans are destroying Mars too! Stop them!

All bullshiite - we were all gonna die back in the 70's too - from the oncoming ice age - which was somehow caused by man too...

Wanna buy some carbon credits? I got 'em cheap - just come around to the back of my car... baaa baaa baaa! God save the Sheeple!

Fight malware by upgrading to Vista, urges MS

Dennis Price

@James Condron

"Calm before the strom, my friend. Is it not possible that you're having some issues, but no more than before? I fail to believe for a moment that anyone has a set up that *Just Works*. Even the Mac fanboys (fairy boys?)"

Well I've been running Vista Business since the end of January and thus far the only real issue (self-inflicted gunshot wounds by my staff don't count - would of happened no matter what they were "operating") has been IE deciding to use italics on damn near any webpage. Figures it would be MY machine and no one else's. Replaced the fonts with non-corrupt ones, used the accessibility settings to force the issue but I don't like that either. Sigh - somebody will get it figured out via dejanews... whoops... Google groups eventually.

Other than that, Vista HAS just worked. (my benchmark? I have three sons who liked breaking into each others NT accounts so they destroy my MS installs. Win3.1: immediately, NT about three months, Win95: two months, Win98: two months, Win2000: four months, XP Pro: 6-8 months, and Vista Business? Running since about Febuary 1 and zero reinstalls. Incrementally getting better on the Microsoft side.)

Dennis Price

Eh, who cares.....

...I've been running Vista Business since it came with my MS Partners action pack thingy and I'm cool with it - after I turned that damn UAC crap off anyway. (kudos to El Reg for the upgrade-clean-install link)

One issue I've found is that Dell, HP, et al put the minimum amount of ram in their machines for Vista - run at least 2 gigs and it works fine - and don't bitch at me about compatability, everything works on this office-built comp right out of the plastic cd holder Vista came in.

I'm still waiting for the issues with Vista that folks seem to be having... waiting with my office of 10 Vista workstations connecting with Win2k3 fileservers.

Just from all the bitching, I must be the only one around with a decent Vista network... and I'm not THAT good - just good enough.

Again, Who cares? Works for me.

Apple: 1.4m iPhones sold, 250,000 unlocked

Dennis Price
Dead Vulture

El Reg hits the big time...


"The New York Times and The Register, a British technology blog, both reported Tuesday."

However I have to stop reading The Register since I was not aware it was a blog.... and I avoid blogs like the plague or people with iphones...

Trouserless car-breaker fingers leprechaun

Dennis Price
IT Angle


Leave it up to them......

Money men rubbish spooky fears over 3Com deal

Dennis Price


They have to give up USRobotics!

No way in hell can they have that brand - The Rise of the Machines demands it! My dream of a robot in every home demands it!

One of Us!

One of Us!

One of Us!


Serious about forcing them to give up the USR brand though... simply UnAmerican.


3Com finally sells out to China

Dennis Price


That means those bastiches get the US Robotics brand!

And that, my friend, is what *really* pisses me off!

French court says non to pre-loaded Windows on Acer laptop

Dennis Price


"To all our US friends: In Europe we tend not to like the "all customers are potential pirates" argument that seems to be an acceptable standard in the US"

Yet the acceptable standard in Europe seems to be "All Americans are stupid, fat, and lazy" or just "warmongers". Or all four.

These fat, lazy, and stupid warmongers have saved you in the last century from speaking German, German, and Russian.

Go figure.

If <insert OS here> is so godlike, wouldn't it be desireable and beat <insert OS here> on it's own merits? a la iphone vs. <insert phone manufacturer here>? (lmao)

Dennis Price

Total shiite...

....sad to see somebody else learning the Art of American Lawsuits... bastards (lawyers - not you)

Anyway, the CORRECT analogy between a car and a computer would be buying a vehicle without it's ECU programmed (timing advance, injector tuning, fuel/air ratio, etc) - sure it will run without it but not very far or well.

Europe talks a lot of trash about the US, yet it's possible for the average American to start a business whereas in Europe, regulations, taxes, the fact you DO NOT want to hire somebody without supporting their family, relatives, the EU's Navy gunrowboats, Belgium, immigrants (legal and not), etc... don't even want to talk about VAT or your regular taxes.

Europe punishes success - which is why they can't defend themselves - from anybody.

Should sue the EU because I like my maps clean - not cluttered up with country borders, or because France comes bundled with non-english speakers - I want to supply my own language and not have to pay the French Language Tax (oh rudeness, not understanding how they are trying to screw me, getting a tutor or being forced to buy software to learn a dying langauge).


LMFAO at the universal stupidity...


An inconvenient update

Dennis Price

The World is Flat....

... and all you stupid bastards are going to fall off the edge.

50's = "The Rompin' Stompin' Red Menace"..... We all gonna die from nukes. ('nuff said, could of happened but didn't - we got lucky)

60's = "Silent Spring".... We all gonna die from poisoning our food supplies ...DDT banned.... skeeters win over humans. Nice death toll there. (and still happening)

70's = "Global Cooling".... We all gonna freeze then die. (shiite! that didn't work - let's try global warming.)

80's = "Nuclear Power".... We all a gonna die from radioactivity - shut 'em down and burn coal, oil, etc. (Gives us an excuse to work on our global warming pr campaign)

90's = "Clinton Years".... We all gonna die... End of the world predictions.... Personally I loaded up on weapons before Hillary was sworn in.. or was that Bill? (Doesn't the US have term limits? after all we got two for one, remember?)

00's = "Global Warming".... We all gonna die from blizzardstyphoonsmonsoonsfloodinghaildustlightningbadbreathnodeoderantlocustsfrogs firessandsnowmudangrygodmuslimschristiansparishiltonapplecloudsrainiphonemicrosoft milkcoffeeteacowstreehuggershippyshillarybushmoresnowmorerainsunblockearthquakese tcetcetc. (Damn... forgot AIDS)

Just face it, we're all gonna die from something - I'm going to get laid and enjoy my weekend. Ya'll can do what you want to.

Yahoo! denies! China! claims!

Dennis Price

@What the difference

If you don't know the difference, you should be at Dailykos, not the Reg.

Fucking anon pussy! (never a good idea, you don't know where it's been)

Anyway.. who gives a fuck about exclaimation points? The Punctuation Nazis? Do you lose sleep over the billions of mis-spelled txts flying around the air without the benefit of your expertise?

Get a fucking life you stupid ass. Fucking morons.


Yeah, it's one of those days.

The BBC iPlayer 'launch' that wasn't

Dennis Price

But But But...

... I thought Apple owned i* ?

Bwaaaahahahahaha couldn't resist.


Can Osama keep Bush afloat?

Dennis Price


Human body contains about 6 quarts of blood - call it a gallon and a half - a hundred thousand gallons divided by 1.5 is apprx. 66666.666666666666666667 people.

Interesting number. Anyway...

I still think Thomas C Greene is a transgender liberal sissy la-la who should spend it's time telling folks not to piss the US off - people who do tend to end up dead. Hello?

Stupid Fsck.

Suit blows £105k in London bar

Dennis Price


"Them that has, gits"

Just about covers it - now you Brits can have an americanism to puzzle over rather than the other way around.

San Francisco's proposed Wi-Fi network facing angry mobs

Dennis Price

The dirty litle secret is....

....the rest of the US (okokok, the northeast US might care - birds of a feather) could give a flying fsck what San Francisco does... just another city in California who will more than likely vote for Sharia law out of compassion for the poor misunderstood Islamic militant folks.

How about an up-to-date Token Ring installation?


Ohio data leak was 'accident waiting to happen'

Dennis Price


I know of one "accident" waiting to happen a couple of states down from there - I've warned them about it for two years and nothing has been done - it's a pisser because MY information is in there... bastards.

Paris Hilton dereassigned back to jail

Dennis Price


"I'm wondering what the secret "medical problem" was...

Posted Friday 8th June 2007 23:22 GMT

"I need 24hr supervision from my Plastic surgeon or my nose will fall off!!!" "

I'm afraid you're confusing Paris Hilton with Micheal Jackson...


For the first time in my life I was cheering Al Sharpton on after he said he was on his way to California to protest (nobody wants an Outraged Al at their front door). However, it's not a color thing - even a redneck like myself would do his 45 days or whatever and what passes as the media would ever know or care about it.

It tickled me that little Miss Paris was placed back in custody, although I might use her address for "home arrest" if the need ever becomes apparent.

Boffin debunks Bush's climate claims

Dennis Price

All BS anyway....

Global warming is nothing but BS anyway - simply the treehugger flavor of the decade. 60's it was DDT, 70's it was pollution, 80's was nuclear power, 90's were... damn... Bill Clinton... and I simply didn't pay attention to anything after his being elected the first time... His second election... well, I decided to play Quake full time....


IF the millions of global warming scientists can't get a computer weather model to predict what has ALREADY been recorded during the past 100 years, why the hell would anyone take seriously those same weather models predicting all the wonderful things that they say will happen if we don't cripple our economies? (ok... everyone except China's economy)

Somebody answer me that.

Safari zero-day exploit nets $10,000 prize

Dennis Price

Side Note....

I do enjoy watching "Dodgeball" and watching Ms. Macboy get the crap knocked out of him....


And as an observation, the only time I've gotten ANY virii on a Winders OS in the past ten years was when my ex opened "trusted" email from a friend of her's - go figure.

Israelis produce miniature Terminator

Dennis Price


I can see it now.....

Largish GPS-enabled truck (without a cab for driver) pulls up within one mile of target (building or enemy position)... point-to-point 5.4MHz (restricted) line-of-sight (GPS enabled of course) dish points back to base/ship/etc.... antenna unfolds from roof..... access point activated.... ramp opens from rear of truck... out rolls "squad" of killer wireless robots.

Meanwhile, back in Good Ol' USA, Israel, Russia, insert-country-here... individuals get a call on cell, excuses him/her/transgender-self from dinner table... closes door to home office and fires up videofeed over the 'net. Recieves his/her/transgender orders and objectives..... takes care of bidness before giving recall command and gets back to table for dessert.

Back on the ship, the person gives recall for the truck to base for maintenance and goes back to surfing the 'net for sheepporn....

Helluva way to fight a war..... of course satellite speeds would have to improve because the latency would wreck all your little robots.... but it's doable.

I like it.