Posts by Nordrick Framelhammer

Dreamliner first flight delayed yet again

Ain't karma a bitch.

If memory serves me Boeing went on loud mouthed media wankfests saying how good they were and how crap Airbus was due to the delays in getting the A380 production ready.

I do not seem to hear Airbus going on a loud mouthed media wankfest now that Boeing have done a faceplant with their new product.

And yes, the Boeing fanbois are conspicuous by theior absence.

And being an IT geek, I do not use a product until it has been given a good shakedown. Now that the A380 has been in service for a while it seems to be a stable, reliable platform so I will fly in it. I'll leave the first flight crap to those out there that make up for their small wedding tackle by waving their ego's around instead.

Apple hikes MacBook SATA speed

So let me get this right...

The SATA II specification has been out for close to four years and yet Apple are still having problems with implementing this standrard?

How long will it take them to do the same with the SATA 3 standard?

Don't call me Ishmael

I like my science fiction so...

Yes, you guessed it. I named the machines on my home network. My main server is Nostromo, my firewall is jumpgate, my Windows gaming box is narcissus (the shuttle Ripley used Alien/Aliens), my laptop is Sulaco, my Linux box is kobiashimaru, my NAS box is babylon5, that sort of thing.

PETA pronounces on Obama fly-swat

@ian22

No, Clinton was Lord of the Lowered Flies

US city demands FaceSpaceGooHoo log-ins from job seekers

There is an easy way to fix them.

Create a new account on Arsebook, Twatter, or Mycolon, give the details over, then, a few days or weeks later, log in onto that site from a random unlocked PC, make some rude comments then complain your account has been compromised due to the shitty city policies and sue the living daylights out of them.

No way would they get my active Yahoo account, or other sites I use for my online gaming. No way in hell!

Welsh mum amazed by Marmite Messiah

Thats not Jesus

The image on the lid of that bottle of used axle grease is a picture of an unshaven Ron Jeremy warming up his tongue before going down on one of his co-stars in one of his epic movies.

SATA Revision 3.0 released

I just ...jizzed my pants!

and @ Will Godfrey - I have never seen a sata cable disconnect. If you have the problem, buy the ones with the little metal clip on then.

NZ couple do bunk with £3.9m bank error

I wonder...

Just how many people commenting here would feel the same way if they made a mistake in overpaying something by 1,000% and then have the payee to give them the middle finger.

I suspect most of them would be screaming and pounding the payee's door, bleating away on talkback radio and writing whining posts to every toilet pape^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^Htabloid they could think of, blathering on about how evil the payee was for not returning the money.

Fucking hypocrites.

Microsoft IIS hole fells university server

@lennie

The reason companies use IIS is because they have lazy CIOs managing lazy network admins who have to cater to lazy web "designers" who throw up .ASP crap using a crappy web "design" programme that craps out bloated code that will only work in a crappy browser that does not comply with accepted standards and that only runs on a crappy operating system created by a company with crappy business practices, crappy ethics, crappy programmers, and crappy quality control.

Basically it is all a pile of shit.

Six months on, Macs still plagued by critical Java vuln

crApple==Macro$lut?

So is crApple now following Macro$lut in their secrioty issue management process, namely ignoring it in the hope that a) it will go away if no-one mentions it or b) wait until there are exploits out in the wild for the prob....... oh, wait. Scratch option b).

Come on crApple fannibopis. Why don't you defend "Those Who Can Do No Wrong"(tm). Or will you just stick your fingers in your ears and loudly yell "lalalalalalala I can't hear you. OSX is 100% secure! Lalalalalalalalala"?

Facebook eliminates parts of Wales

Meh

Why worry? It's not as if Wales is is much higher up the IRB World Rugby Rankings than England, with England, at 6th, just shading Wales at 7th. Neither team is likely to beat the top 3 ranking teams any time soon.

@richard

Let's face it. The sewers of a slum are better beer than what is made in the USA.

Fanbois squeal over Mac OS X upgrade

CrApple strikes again

Who would have guessed that CrApple would screw up an update for their great and gloriously perfect OS that never crashes. I must admit I never saw that coming at all!

"It just works" - my fat, hairy, unwashed arse it does.

And to the editors, please get it right. They are Apple fannibois.

Paris because according to her people she has gone down less often than a Mac updated with the last two updates from Apple.

Apple bars 2.0 code from App Store

But.....

Has crApple finally managed to figured out how to get the IhaveasmallPenisPhone to do cut and paste?

Or will that be left for a later version? 5.8 perhaps?

Telecom NZ dodges Vodafone wrath

They are as bad as each other

Both Telecom and Vodafone as about as useful as tits on a bull. On this issue, as with others they are waving their tiny dicks around and the public are the ones getting pissed on.

Vodafone do have a legitimate gripe in this case though. Telecom have been testing their XT (eXtranious Turd?) network for a couple of months down in Wellington and very, very, very co-incidently Vodphone uses started reporting disconnection issues and slow performance. Telecom has rushed the network out before proper testing was completed in order to beat Vodafone's competing product.

Telecom have a history of underhanded tactics against their competitors. This is just another exampole.

SCO threatened with Chapter 7 destruction

Finally an end to this silly and sorry saga?

Does this mean and end to this whole silly and sorry saga?

SCO are a laughing stock in the industry and have been pretty much since they switched from writing UNIX applications to waving their tiny todgers around like demented kids in the hope that it would frighten people into capitulating to their ridiculous licensing scam.

Isle of Man KKK burns cross on Facebook

Cool

The ISLE of Man TT organizers could clearly make use of that guy.

Aren't they looking for speedbumps for the pit entry?

Swine flu apocalypse: Batten down the hatches

It is not a pandemic or an epidemic

It is a mediademic.

A mediademic is a minor outbreak of a disease with a mortality rate in the low single digit percentage figure that is blown out of all proportion by the drooling, knuckle dragging, slop;ed forheaded members of the mainstream media who cannot be bothered actually researching a story but instead pile fetid hyperbole on fetid hyperbole.

And I used the plying piug joke oin someone in the office already. Should have seen throir faces drop when I said it had mutated and combined with bird flu and the smiles on their faces when the punchline was dropped on them.

Judge sends Blockbuster to court over Facebook Beacon Borking

Yet another reason...

not to use "social networking" like Facebook as well as sites like Twatter^H^H^H^H^H^H^HTwitter. As far as I am concerned they are all craptaular fail.

Carry On producer Peter Rogers dead at 95

RIP that man!!!

I remember the Carry On films from my childhood, and still get a good laugh from them now.

I think one of the things that made the movies so memorable is that they had no pretentious or delusions of grandeur.

You will be missed, Peter Rogers. And thankyou.

Pizza-polluting YouTube plonkers soil Domino's

Who eats there crap anyway?

thank goodness where I am there are decent places to go for pizzas and burgers so I don't have to eat the crap that Dominoes, Pizza Hut, McDonalds and Burger King jokingly refer to as food. McDonalds - 20 billion sold, 200,000 digested.

I was mildly aused by one Dominoes I went past though. They had a rubbish skip out the front labelled "Industrial waste". I thought, yep, that pretty much describes their product.

iPhone's Wi-Fi problems cause heated speculation

Jesus Phone, heal thyself!

Gee, who would have guessed that Apple's form over function mentality would come back to bite them in the ass.

Microsoft loudly disses secret 'Cloud Manifesto'

We all know the reason for this complaint

The only reason Macro$lut is complaining about this is because they are having to listen to what others want rather than being able to force their requirements and standards on everyone else.

But this is an example of M$'s innovation through acquisition failing them. They did not buy some cloud startup early enough and are now in catchup mode.

But i predict this "cloud computing" stuff ill go the same way as the Newton and Grid Computing.

Screeching rails close London Tube station

Sqeaky lines?

Sheesh, next thing you know trains will be stopping due to leaves on the lines!

Oh, wait...

Oz runs Romero-themed zombie awareness week

An Aussie run campaign using Braindead?

Unlikely, since Braindead is from the country that supplies Australia with people with three figure IQs, namely New Zealand.

Hollywood to totally recall Total Recall

Oh shit

Why can't those smalldicked asswipes in Hollywank leave good movies alone?

Twats.

Next-gen Mac mini 'photo' surfaces

Meh

It's probably another rumour "leaked" from Apple to try and get the faniboy's juices bubbling.

It is the only way they can get sane people interested in their form over function boxes. Let's not forget that this is the same company that thought releasing a "smart phone" without rudimentary features like copy and paste.

Google sued by biz directory

I have another piointless exercise to Mr Savage

It involves pushing diarrhea up Mt Everest with his nose

New Zealand bolts net filtering regime into place

@Winkypop

Nope. the Australians are the sheep shaggers. They started those rumours to try to make the market for the vastly superior NZ sheep collapse. Also they were jealous that NZ sheep looked better than the fuzzy maggots grown on the western side of the Tasman Sea.

What do you call a bloke driving a flock of sheep away from an Australian military installation? A broke pimp. Broke because the Aussies are to busy crying into their vegemite sandwiches after going 2-0 down in the One Day International series against New Zealand in front of their own supporters.

Red Dwarf finally returns to Earth

About smegging time!

It has been too smegging long since this most excellent of shows graced our screens and tickled our spleens.

I would love to see Holly back as well.

Microsoft cuts 5,000 jobs - but Ballmer's hiring

Yo can bet...

that the people shown the door will be the workers while management will still collect bonuses for "saving" the company money.

Church of Scientology seeks 'ban' against HIV+ protesters

@flugal

Sorry, there is no way to cure Scientologists. Knuckle dragging, drooling, dull minded stupidity that makes your average inbred Deliverance type look smart (required to be a scientology mermber) is incurable by any method that does not result in the heart stopping.

As for stopping them breeding, I suggest blowing up the turkey baster facto.... sorry, the factor where they make the L Ron Hubbard Squirter, the only insemination device (natural or otherwise) to be used by Scientologists. It comes with a 60 day replacement gurantee backed by Xenu (Shipping costs of $100,000 are not covered)

NZ cops claim 'first Facebook arrest' of bungling safe-cracker

The funny thing was...

He was doing this in a small room which is described as "rather warm at the best of times" and he took his balaclava off because he was sweating.

They showed the footage of him on the TV news when he spotted the camera in the roof. It was priceless watching his face falling faster than Paris Hilton's knickers at the first sign of a video camera.

And they identified him in one day.

Microsoft delays first Windows 7 public beta

Delayed?

That is srange. Having just finished downloading the 32 bit ISO I am now downloading the 64 bit ISO.

UFO damages Lincolnshire wind turbine

@Scott Broukell

So just how big must the joint that is smoked to summon Amanfrommars be?

It is a shame that news organisations constantly pander to the idiotic delusions of the tin foil hat brigade.

Anyway. It wasn't caused by UFO's. It was the combined Vl'hurg and G'Gugvuntt battle fleets screaming across the vast, majestic, sunswept plains of Lincolnshire in search of Arthur Dent.

Microsoft plague threatens 30GB Zune extinction

Typical Macro$lut. And as for that IPod crap...

Why am I not surprised that Macro$lut cannot do something as simple as taking account of leap years. I bet the UK sailors are really looking forward to hearing "CRASH DIVE" over the tannoy and not knowing if it is a real emeregency or just another reboot.

And as for those crappy ipod things, if it cannot natively play FLAC and OGG VORBIS files then it ain't worth shit.

BBC: Top Gear Tesla didn't run out of juice

Get a life people...

A couple of things.

1. The vehicle appeared to lose power twice while testing. We wewre not told why on the first one but on the second one iot was due to the engine overheating. A bit worrying

2. Part of the 55k range thing could havce been due to the fact that Tesla couldn't supply a car (a production car no less) with a reliable enough gearbox to allow it to be used in both gear ranges(!)

3. Nowhere is the show did they say that the pushing scene was related to running out of power.

4. An electric car that can lose it's brakes while being charged is a real worry.

5. The thing looked like it handled like a real pig.

@Nathan Todd.

1. Most modern diesels are now self bleeding.

2. Here is a test. Put an petrol/diesel car 3 miles from a petrol station and see how long it takes you to get it going again from running out of fuel. Then put an electric car 3 miles from a power point and see how long it takes you to get going again. Hell, put it on the side of the average country road 200 metres from a house and see how long it takes you to get going again.

3. Who pays for the power used to charge up cars from a street light. Would you?

4. Not a bad idea. It would take a van to carry enough batteries to transfer the charge. Unlike a petrol can which can be carried.

To all the peole that think that range of battery cars is goign to get better, dream on. Battery manufacturers have been trying since the battery was first invented to increase the batteries energy density, which means the amount of power it can produce per kilo of battery weight. Unfortunately the highest density they can come up with suitable for normal conditions are also the most likely to burst into flame (Sony laptop batteries anyone?)

All in all I thought the report on the Tesla was actually pretty fair. They have been a lot worse on cars without the car makers wetting their knickers and saying they will sue the show. If Tesla want to be taken seriously they will need to grow up and stop their bottom lip quivering every time they don't get a perfect review.

I must admit it will be funny watching Tesla trying to sue Top Gear. I think that tersla would be in for a nasty shock (pun intended)

How Warcraft reigned supreme in 2008

So WoW is ...

Judging by the way the article reads, the reason that WoW succeeds is because it is a very, very easy PVE game with little danger of having your character killed by the little beasties or, horror of horrors, in PVP.

And of those 11 million "accounts" I wonder how many of them are actually active and how many of them are accounts abandonded by people bored out of their skulls who never bothered to cancel.

American 'football' goes 3D

I cvan't wait for this

Just imagine ball those cheerleaders in glorious 3D.

Yummy

Deleted

@Botty

She is one of te new lick and stick models.

Apple sued over Jesus Phone 'hairline cracks'

Awwwwww.........

Are the posers just finding out that they have paid way over the odds for a piece of "Look at me. Ain't I the hipster with my latest piece of ego-wank tat" that is starting to break apart just from ordinary, everyday use?

And now they are stuck with it for the next couple of years, knowing they have been shafted and have no legal way of getting out of the contract.

It makes me smile.

Rambus asks ITC to bar US Nvidia imports

Another example of the useless US patent system

Leechlike companies such as RAMBUS, who do not actually do any work, are able to survive purely on the real work of legitimate companies. It is a shame there isn't a rule that states that a company must either be producing items or developing items from their patents or they lose them after 5 years.

Microsoft's 'M' treads on US veterans' toes

@Eddie Edwards

Actually the World Wildlife Fund do own the WWF trademark. The World Wrestling Federation was forced to change it's name to WWE, or World Wrestling Entertainment way back in 2002.

http://www.commondreams.org/headlines02/0507-04.htm

So yes, they do have the legal backing to force M$ to use a different TLA.

Michael Crichton dead at 66

Yet another great writer dies

Sadly we lose another great writer.

The thing I liked about his books is that they were very believable. You could easily get lost in them due to the way he wove his story. He was able to make you feel something for each of his characters.

RIP.

Daylight savings shift to cause phone havoc Down Under

PHBs

Don't forget that a lot of those devices are carried around by posturing PHB's who are barely capable of breathing and blinking at the same time. They have to make sure that they are not late for the myriad meetings to make them look more busy and therefore more important than the mere workers who's working lives are made a misery by those same PHBs. So having to do the menial and horrendous task of adjust a meeting time in their brains is just to much for their overloaded synapses to cope with.

UK WoW fans plead for Lich King Collector's Edition

Awwwww duddims

Awww, poor widdle World of Warcwaft pwayers. Looks like they will have to find some other way of trying to look cool in their parents basements. What will they spend their lunch money on now.

Mine is the one with the laughing gnome in the pocket

Apple bans App Store heartbreak chatter

The iPoser company strikes again.

What is it with this company? Just when they start making moves in the market they start pulling bonehead moves like this. They had people fooled into buying their overpriced, overhyped hardware only to then restrict them to the software that they decide their victim^H^H^H^H^H^Hcustomers should be able to run. Makes Macro$lut's monopolistic practices look positively benevolent in comparison.

Hammer Films has risen from the grave

Sweet

I still like the Hammer House of Horror productions. There is a slightly campy quyality to them despite having some of the biggest names in the genre in them. Horror movies now just seems to compete in how much blood they can fill the set with. No style.

Mine is the one with the plastic, glow in the dark vampire teeth.

Mitsubishi eyes Middle Earth for 'early' electric car roll-out

WTF?!?!?!

What is it about the Japanese and buttugly micro cars? Do they not know how to design on their own rather than poorly copy the ugly Mercedes A series only to mess it up? The classicc Mini (not the fake modern one) was the quintessential micro car.

@Mike Richards. At least the Volt looks like a car rather than a mutant jellybean on toy car wheels. The front of the Volt looks OK although could do with a small amount of restyling. But the back end of it ceretainly does need to be fixed. What is it with Yanks and fat asses.

Beauty contest judge canned for slamming 'munter' contestants

You never know....

They may be doing it PC style and judging her "inner beauty".