Posts by Gavsky

New hire fixed a problem so fast, their boss left to become a yoga instructor

"Fresh eyes, can win the prize" - as nobody has ever said, not 2000BC years ago...

Summoning the spirit of the BBC Micro with a Pi 500+ and a can of spray paint

Few realise that the specific shade of beige used for the original, was actually called 'Nicotine-stained Pub Wallpaper'...

AI video company arouses fury by boasting about replacing creative jobs

For the Win! [erm, read the room]

AI can produce endless slop but it's usually all too obvious. It's like taking a fantastic steak, mixing it with meat offcuts & blending...then expecting the resulting, brown mush to taste the same as the steak.

Curse of AI to push up PC prices as memory and CPU shortages bite

Hmm, that sounds like a good plan - has anyone mentioned it to Adobe?...

Ingredients: too few manufacturers; too much faith & investment rushing into 'AI for everything!'; Trump. Oh, unnecessary bloatware, too...

Microsoft declares 'reliability' a priority for Visual Studio AI

Focus less on shoehorning AI into everything, El Reg?! Go & stand in the corner & think about what you've done! No dinner for you, tonight. Thank God they can't hear you...

In other news, "...handle scenarios where Copilot and IntelliSense trip over each other or where suggestions appear at the same time" - isn't this how Microsofty products are supposed to work?

Fix A, break B, and C. Sometimes D. Oh, and E. Fix A breaking B, which then breaks F & G. Fix A breaking C, working on F. Did anyone resolve E? Hello?

Betterment breach may expose 1.4M users after social engineering attack

And that begs two questions a) why don't companies encrypt all of this sensitive data, as standard? (it might slow the exploitation of it, at least) & b) "...a fraudulent cryptocurrency promotion disguised as an official company message" - why doesn't that strike EVERYONE seeing it as being a bit odd, a little bit fishy?!

Workday reveals around 400 staff soon won't have to work another day

"Quite how a company can so epically screw up UX/UI and still manage to be biggest player..." - M'lud, I'd like to enter 'Microsoft' as evidence, if it pleases you...

I've found Work-a-Day to be...okay. For booking holiday, viewing pay statements & employment documents mind you - nothing fancy. They do like to try & hide some elements of those, but that's the fun; this is obviously deliberate design on their part.

They could simply put a big icon indicating "Salary", but that's old-fashioned & SO 90s, darling!...

Re: Non revenue generating roles

Testing and Quality Assurance? - well, it's worked brilliantly for Microsoft...

Amen to that, but have you ever tried getting a worming tablet into Mandelson? Little sod waits a bit, then it drops out of his mouth onto the carpet. I'm considering the...alternative entrance. Ahem.

UK justice system unplugs from ancient datacenters after five-year slog

Re: Sir Brian Leveson recommends numerous uses of AI

AI can actually be very good at summarising great swathes of text, but a) it can't be wholly trusted & b) human. Remove b) as a check & fun & games can ensue.

The idiot lawyers who ask AI to find case law examples, then discover some are totally made-up...are lazy morons. But, it's hilarious when a Judge points this out to them - in Court. Oh dear. Multiple examples.

Re: Exclusive Pictures of ...

That made me laugh, so thank you for that. It's only funny because it's true...

To say that successive governments have failed to do enough regarding the Court system's IT, is an understatement. Ridiculous numbers of software packages, creaking hardware, single points of failure - it's no surprise that our legal system is hopelessly inefficient. Add in the still old-fashioned & sometimes opaque nature of UK justice & you've a perfect storm.

Improvements have been made, absolutely - but it's still pointlessly labyrinthine & slow.

'Lethal' and 'magical' Palantir tech is in demand by Pentagon, China, Middle East, CEO says

AI properly implemented can save time, money & frustration - it's not universally 'The Fall of Rome'. It's just the rush to implement, blind faith in its capabilities & insane energy & investment that's the problem.

EU's fishy digital certificate system leaves exporters floundering

Ah, where Government & IT meet is too often the 'Death Zone' for multiple projects, over decades. You'd think lessons had b...no.

What will the intended system do? What do the users need - from the 'coalface' up? Build, make it as simple as possible, test x infinity. Release.

Lego shrinks NASA's biggest rocket – accuracy sold separately

Having built a large oil rig & sailing ship, both made of LEGO but not kits, I would expect the same thing to happen. Moving these items downstairs to show parents etc, resulted in mid-stair calamity...

AI agents can't yet pull off fully autonomous cyberattacks – but they are already very helpful to crims

The time may come when all we have to do is issue commands to AI, whilst lying on the sofa - even hackers. We won't have to actually interact or look at anything. It'll just be AI agents talking to each other, whilst we eat crisps & wonder what our purpose is...

Next-gen nuclear reactors safe enough to skip full environmental reviews, says Trump admin

Yup, that's the type of hair that prevents conflict, or ends wars*

*No guarantee of conflict avoidance or war-endage is implied, nor should be inferred. Please read the T&C.

By cauliflower? Erm, only if they expected Armageddon, I guess. Oh, wait...

It's not Republicans, full-stop (okay, 'period') - the old, statesmanlike, rule of law, 'friends & allies' Republicans must still be out there, somewhere. They've just been overwhelmed by the demi-cult 'Trump Party'®

All this too, shall pass...

Hey, guys! We're cool, right? That Elon & his Expert DoGE crew have checked everything out - nothing to see here, Bro. Look, it's tech-stuff, okay? Above our heads, man - but, these guys are geniuses!..

Critical React Native Metro dev server bug under attack as researchers scream into the void

Is AI beginning to generate these headlines? I started reading this one & then ran-out of oxygen halfway through.

What's wrong with "IT-ageddon! All Your Bases Are Belong to Us"?

Firefox makes AI optional, like it probably should have been all along

Re: There are better alternatives out there

You'd better inform Microsoft - "...Muscle memory is tricky to retrain", hence I can't use the Edge browser.

I can fix this confusion - definitively*

*Only applies to software environments. Please read the T&C.

'Enabled' - It's ON, You made the decision.

'Available' - It's ON, but pretending not to be. You didn't make the decision, but our service to you depends on bits of it being 'ON' regardless, plus - we make money by selling your data to 3rd parties & that can't collect itself, can it?

Giraffes? What have they got to do with it? I asked AI, see...so it must be right.

No, no, no! This isn't how it works! You make AI compulsory - forcing any user who doesn't want it, to download software tools of uncertain virtue, off the interwebnet. Then, they remove some of it, whilst simultaneously sending their banking details to North Korea - unwittingly.

Idea©Microsoft - 'What's choice?' ®Microsoft

UK names Barnsley as first Tech Town to see whether AI can fix... well, anything

That's nothing, I can see The Hanging Gardens of Babylon from mine. But, I actually live in Babylon!...so, the jokes on me...probably.

Indeed, so my money is on: sell it to the Chinese, then enslave, erm...work in partnership with - local residents. 100% employment & a perfect site for toxic waste disposal. Oh, & we'll need a wall building...

"Hello, welcome to Barnsley, twinned with Acapulco & Cologne. This is an automated service supported by AI - my name is t'HAL. If you wish to make a council tax payment - please press 1. If you wish to arrange collection of a bulky refuse item - please press 2. If you want to enquire about planning matters - please press 7 & 3 & 12 simultaneously.

If you want to report fly-tipping in your area - please press eleventy. If you want to report Bananas - but excluding Melons - please press the 'Hash' key in time to this music, for 30-seconds"...

Europe shrugs off tariffs, plots to end tech reliance on US

Re: The scope is not large enough

"The US is not Europe's friend" - I always remember that Trump isn't forever & most Americans are decent, friendly & faithful people, so shouldn't be counted with him. We will return to Statesmanlike behaviour, respect for the law, friends & allies. All this too, shall pass.

I hate conspiracy theories, but...

Has Trump been enthroned to actively dismantle everything, allowing Russia & China to dominate, well - everything? Responsible parties? The usual: The Illuminati, Freemasons, Zionists, Lizard people, erm...the Boy Scouts? Women's Institute?

Elon Musk merges xAI into SpaceX to spread universal consciousness via a sentient sun

"Because the drugs don't work; they just make you worse" - with apologies to 'The Verve'.

"...to make a sentient sun..." - erm, okay. How about making a car that can really self-drive? AI that isn't psychotic & a member of the Nazi party? Come back then, Elon - we'll talk about the sun-thing...

McDonald's is not lovin' your bigmac, happymeal, and mcnuggets passwords

Ah, hence 'The AI Super Revolution'® Big Corps

Once it decides that we're irretrievably stupid, we're doomed!

Or, "Those QR codes! I mean, phwoar, eh?!"

"McDonald'sMurdersCows" is already verboten...

Agents gone wild! Companies give untrustworthy bots keys to the kingdom

It's just binary!

Humans tend to anthropomorphise - so these AI agents are suddenly 'desperate to please', or become 'bad agents', deliberately misleading etc. I think that's where the ridiculous notion of AI becoming sentient, self-aware - comes from (along with watching too many Sci-Fi films).

It's just clever algorithms, binary - we've created it & so should absolutely be able to control it. AI going 'wrong' shouldn't come as ANY surprise, because it's a creation of fallible humans. Part of the issue comes from believing AI is the answer to everything (42 etc.) & the rush to implement it without a cool & realistic appraisal of the need to.

Thousands more Oregon residents learn their health data was stolen in TriZetto breach

Encryption?

My first question about all of these data breaches: was the data encrypted; if not, why not? Particularly important with SUCH sensitive data & wouldn't it make life much more difficult for hackers to misuse what they've stolen?

I've been a victim of three, major hacking episodes - along with hundreds of thousands of others. I can't get a simple answer about data encryption. It should be a basic requirement for GDPR.

NS&I's IT car crash considers cutting legacy links to stop the bleeding

Humans, eh? If it's possible to over-complicate, we're absolute experts at it. It should be relatively simple, what with the IT & management expertise available, but we reinvent the wheel, so often.

Autonomous cars, drones cheerfully obey prompt injection by road sign

Because some humans are...

Technology is great, but some humans are naughty & will misuse it. So, you make it really difficult for those people to ruin it for everyone else. As with keyless vehicle entry...er, no - bad example. AI isn't sentient, intelligent or discerning - it simply can't cope with real, messy life.

Birmingham City Council's Oracle ERP fiasco now £144M and still not working

Re: Birmingham resident and IT professional here

Oracle & BCC management are obviously cut from the same cloth: the Utter Moron pattern.

This is AMAZING progress!

It has to be said, this scenario is SO resolutely crap that it actually falls below zero achievement, then free falls until it hits Absolute Zero...but then obviously bounces back to 100% success (to be confirmed). Can't they just sell Birmingham to Elon? The residents can then be enslaved & make parts for his robot AI...thingy.

Capita pension portal 'fiasco' forces Cabinet Office into damage control

No, no, no - you obviously don't work for us. These things come as a real shock, despite being business common sense & basic, due dili...dilla...dilly - what you wroted. So, throw lots of agency staff & existing employees pulled from other contracts - at the issue. Cue contract penalties, "Christ, not AGAIN", reputational damage, low morale, no contract profit - or, an actual loss.

'Tis the Crapita way - now increasingly AI-enhanced, so the future's bright...

Ah, they will be promoted to head of the 'AI is Brilliant - No, Really Division'. Apparently, AI is going to make us all Crapita Gods - I'm sick to death of the emails telling us so...

Re: Office

Because © & ® Microsoft...

Re: Quelle Surprise

The tragedy is: we can actually perform really well; the STA (school pupil testing) is a great example: lots of investment, ironed-out the wrinkles - it flew! (eventually). Then, we lost the contract to another outsourcer - but, expectation is that they will do SO badly, that Crapita will regain it. Probably. Perhaps...