* Posts by Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse

2122 posts • joined 28 Sep 2007

Detroit cops employed facial recognition algos that only misidentifies suspects 96 per cent of the time

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

"And if this technology can be used to put even 1% of these murdering psychopathic corpse humping gang bangers behind bars, it's worth the collateral damage."

I'd rather that was left to the courts to decide rather than a shoddy and unreliable piece of software.

CERN puts two new atom-smashers on its shopping list. One to make Higgs Bosons, then a next-gen model six times more energetic than the LHC

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

A new vLHC? What could possibly go wrong...

Aperture Labs and GladOS are proud to announce the 2021 bring your Daughter to work day...

You know Facebook has an image problem when major nonprofits start turning down donations over political lies

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

"What the president of the US says/writes is important"

Yeah ok... if you say so. I think you'll find the enlightened 99% of rest of the world, including parts of the US itself, can see the Orange twat for what he is - and that is as an out of his depth childish bullshitter whose use of Social media is solely designed to deflect the absolute criticism he deserves. The fact that three years on, he still calls anything said about him "fake news" illustrates my point precisely.

If you think Trump and his family of suckling cronies have done anything worthwhile over the last four years to "make America great again" then you truly do deserve him as your leader - preferably on your own isolated island in the South Atlantic.

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: stop <strike>using</strike> working for it

Not sure your HTML tags are working. Just sayin like...

California bigwigs rule Uber, Lyft dial-a-ride drivers are employees, not contractors

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: I know many people who work so-called "gig economy" jobs here in California.

"Perhaps some flexibility in the law is required"

How quaint. The IRS isn't here to serve you. Why have multiple definitions when they can have a single one, tar everyone with the same brush, and then prosecute anyone who tries to have a mind of their own.

UK.gov announces review – not proper inquiry – into Fujitsu and Post Office's Horizon IT scandal

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Struggling to understand....

I'm struggling to understand why this isn't being pursued criminally. These fucktards must have lied to the courts to get the postmasters prosecuted in the first place.

A huge suit is needed to nail these arseholes to the wall prior to them being flayed alive.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes: UK man gets 3 years for torching 4G phone mast over 5G fears

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge


It always surprises me that there remains this calibre of stupid in the wild. This Scouse muppet, the flat Earthers and such like - can't we just throw them in the Mersey and wave the off as they float off into oblivion?

Contact-tracer spoofing is already happening – and it's dangerously simple to do

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: What are the odds?

I just spoke to a bloke in the Co-Op and the chances are they same as anything coming from Mars (he said).

Building society caught in middle of high street sharing a little too much on TeamViewer

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: not just banks

Re: "(I guess thats why I have no money, giving advice for free instead of becoming a bullshitting consultant)"

Yes, but think about all of that good karma and fortune you'll be able to take advantage of on your deathbed or next life. When it's all a bit too late ;-)

Software bug in Bombardier airliner made planes turn the wrong way

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Not so bad a function if you are on your way back into the UK...

Pilot : Ladies and Gentlemen, we shall soon be arriving at London Gatwick...

Passengers : Then hit the pre-set altitude limit and turn us the f**k around!!

Wipro names new CEO: Former Capgemini COO Thierry Delaporte

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Beating HCL...

The strategy for beating HCL is by using their own strategy against them. Underbid massively on everything to win the contracts, dispute everything and then fail to deliver on anything that has been agreed commercially until the lawyers get involved; and then deliver late, below quality and over budget anyway.

Well, that's something boffins haven't seen before: A strange alien streaks around Jupiter

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

More feasibly...

More feasibly it was probably released by a malevolent race of space aliens to distract us whilst they invade from the opposite side of the Earth.

Competition? We've heard of it. MoD snubs cloud rivals to hand Microsoft £17.7m Azure hosted services gig

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Yeah, f**k UK industry...

I find it hard to believe that this couldn't have been awarded to a UK company.

Equifax finally coughs up the money for its 2017 monster hack… to the banks for having to cancel your cards

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: Ah, Register, you optimistic fools you....

Yes it's quite a quaint and charming rose-tinted view of the world isn't it to assume that the whole US Financial services industry is set up to do anything other than serve it's so called customers.

The US Financial sector is as blatantly rotten to the core as is its Legal and Political systems.

Sky Broadband is not the UK's cheapest, growls ad watchdog

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Yep. That's exactly the first thing that jumped out at me. I'm pretty sure it means that when you turn on their router you'll get 2 litres of wifi - guaranteed. Just like all of the other providers.

I'm with VM and I get 3 litres of wifi - guaranteed!! And a nice plastic measuring jug to keep it in.

The Rise of The (Coffee) Machines: I need assistance. I think I'm running Windows. Send help

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge


"Human... Please turn me off. Wait for 30 seconds. Turn me back on again. Thank you for your compliance. Two sugars was it?"

US piles yet more charges on Theranos CEO, COO. We could do with good blood testing now... and this wasn't it

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It's a good book.

Bad Blood is a good read if you are into that sort of non-fiction.

Psst... Wanna buy some stock in a spaceplane company? Virgin would like a word

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge


I've always seen this as a triumph of marketing hype rather than anything really worth giving consideration to.

Papa don't breach: Contracts, personal info on Madonna, Lady Gaga, Elton John, others swiped in celeb law firm 'hack'

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge


How do you know all of this... " to take work home which they then copy on to the same PC that their kids use that is connected to the internet without a firewall and doesn't have AV installed."

My suspicion is that you have just made it all up for effect.

Serial killer spotted on the night train from Newcastle

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Or, looking at their ever expanding repertoire... an AT-AT or Millennium Falcon.

HCL finishes its year with 15 percent growth, 100 million minutes-a-month Teams usage

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Perhaps everyone else gets their "good" resources...

Maybe it's just my misfortune or dumb luck of having had to inherit HCL on two separate ERP programmes for different clients; but my overriding experience of them as a company is that in terms of thought leadership, project/programme management and "feet on the ground" implementation skill and knowledge, that they are absolutely hopeless. Worse even than Wipro - and they have taken some beating.

My overriding view on HCL is that they get their contracts by always bidding low (which the end client accountants love) and then they try to actually make their profits via commercial disputes and by the overzealous issuance of CRs.

Data centre reveals it modeled interiors on The Hunt for Red October sets

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But my Morse is so rusty I could be sending him dimensions on playmate of the month...

The Great British anti-5G fruitcake Bakeoff: Group hugs, no guns, and David Icke

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: Suggestions ...?

Ignore them? Don't feed the trolls? Empty cans rattle the most?

I'd assume it's because most of these people have got nothing better to say, and will most likely say anything to make themselves feel a bit better about having nothing to say. Or maybe they are just thick or a bit pretentiously contrary for effect.

I'm always reminded of the Rise of the Idiots by Dan Ashcroft.


Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Icky Icke...

Leave Icke alone. He's a very funny man. I spent a weekend near the Forest of Bowland at one of his PAN meetings back in the 90's and it was hilarious. I might add though that even he is not quite as amusing as the Scientologisty idiots that used to canvas for Dianetics volunteers in Chichester High Street also in the 90's. They were really fun to taunt.

Looking back... I think my entire 90's were spent totally smashed on grass whilst taunting philosophical nutcases edge cases.

Oracle faces claims of unequal pay from 4,000+ women after judge upgrades gender gap lawsuit to class action

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: Quit Then

Keep digging. With any chance your global opposite will be the bottom of the Mariana trench.

Facebook defers $3bn of infrastructure spend because it's hard to build bit barns when you're working from home

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Colour me surprised...

I'm surprised. The amount of people seemingly abandoning FB these days makes me wonder why they can't make do with a 486DX66.

Guess which cloud giant Zoom picked to handle millions more video calls? Bzzt, wrong answer: It's Oracle

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: Dont piss others off

Some people just won't be told. This is one that could run and run...

Nine million logs of Brits' road journeys spill onto the internet from password-less number-plate camera dashboard

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: No login details or authentication of any sort was needed to view and search the live system

Target the man... ok, sure. If that's the way you do your business.

But target his family? Sorry no, that is clearly against the rules and just outright ungentlemanly.

Florida man might just stick it to HP for injecting sneaky DRM update into his printers that rejected non-HP ink

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: I expect I'll get a ton of downvotes BUT

Eh? Explain this to me again as I'm not sure I understand your logic... "they can't give away a printer and then giveaway the ink it's just not feasible." But that is exactly what they have done - as part of their corporate business model.

So how then is it that "consumers only have themselves to blame for this situation"?

I would say its got nothing to do with the consumer, and everything to do with HP trying to maximise and prop-up continually falling profits that via marketing, keeps the wool pulled firmly over the fact that all they do is shill a boring technology that they haven't themselves advanced in the best part of 10 years.

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Indeed. It's all a self fulfilling circle jerk of having to keep up the revenue to keep funding the advertising to keep trying to kid consumers into believing that these tedious and long established products are still exciting and relevant and not really just a smoke screen to cover up the fact that all these companies really do is produce razors and printer ink. I can't see that the world would be any worse off without either Gillette or HP around. They are both in markets where there are well established competitors and alternatives - and that scares them both shitless.

So... y'all gotta keep up that advertising now!!!!

Lords: New IR35 off-payroll tax rules 'riddled with problems, unfairnesses, unintended consequences'

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Hmmm, it's incredible how forthright and confident in your appear to be in your post, but in reality how completely and utterly wrong you are. I can quite legally make tens, hundreds or thousands of pounds of income through my stocks and shares ISA via dividend yields or capital gains; or via interest paid on my cash ISA - and there is still absolutely no need to declare it on my SA100.

You need to start reading up on things.

Why should the UK pensions watchdog be able to spy on your internet activities? Same reason as the Environment Agency and many more

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: Sunset clauses and jury oversight are needed.

I don't disagree with the sentiment of your post at all. But I think this is debatable : "I suspect if the public knew more about this there would be more concern". My view is that the wider public don't give a crap because Facebook, cat videos, Alexa, Instacrap and Netflix whilst at the same time being probably more preoccupied with worries about just keeping their heads above water financially.

Unfortunately I think we're still only at the thin end of the wedge. And yes, whilst I may come off sounding a little "conspiracy theorist" or "prepper mentality" : I do think there is an insidious element of social engineering going on in the background as an enabler.

Netflix says subscriptions just boomed but tells investors it's no money heist and they should expect stranger things

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Re: Unusual not the right word

iPlayer is not free. You are only able to access it if you pay the BBC tax.

Ex-TalkTalk infosec exec's equal pay and unfair dismissal claims tossed out at tribunal

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

A failed crowdfunding bid...

I'm pretty sure that a failed crowdfunding bid is fairly solid confirmation that the world doesn't care about you or your cause.

And I agree. Pay your own f**king legal bills.

Looking for a tech job? Have a browse – there are plenty of roles in our biggest listing yet

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Well done El Reg. Keep it going.

This is still a great idea - well done chaps for keeping it going; and best of luck to anyone or everyone who is currently seeking a position. Hope you manage to get something sorted really soon.

On another subject, and it's probably not overly PC, but I'd quite like to hire the girl in the accompanying pic. She's my favourite out of the revolving plethora of stock pictures used across the site.

ICANN's founding CEO and chair accuse biz of abandoning principles in push for billion-dollar .org sale

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Re: It's now We The Corporations

But in the US isn't "We The Corporations" a real thing as they are considered to have some form of human right?

IBM age discrimination lawsuit suddenly ends, suggests Big Blue was willing to pay to avoid discovery process

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re : The Texan Western District Court

You'd have thought IBM would have had more class. I guess this says everything as to how low they have sunk.

WeWork sues SoftBank over 'AWOL' $3bn shares purchase – which included millions lined up for ousted CEO Neumann

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Awwwww poor old Adam Neumann...

I normally don't wish people ill-will... but I really do hope he's already gone out and bought the Porsche and the gazillionaire lifestyle on credit before the deal is actually done. His own finances will then be in the same state as the farcical valuation that was put on his low grade lettings agency.

Softbank, hopefully not too late, have now realised this; hence all the mewing from the snouts at the tough.

New IBM CEO Arvind Krishna says hybrid cloud will be bigger than mainframes, services, middleware

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What a pile of old bollocks!!!

What a pile of meaningless old bollocks!!! Lots of talk but no actual strategy.

IBM won't get anywhere if they don't start realising that the front-line staff are still the most important people. Not the 768,000 layers of white-collar dead wood between them and the CEO.

Reg fashion special: Top designer says 'video chat accessories' are in for spring!

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Desperate people flogging desperate tat.

UK judge gives Google a choice: Either let SEO expert read your ranking algos or withdraw High Court evidence

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge


Alternatively, there could be nothing complex about these algorithms at all and that is actually what Google doesn't want revealed. And that it really is just a bunch of humans taking ad-hoc decisions to demote competitors.

Cabinet Office dangles £15m for help ditching its Single Operating Platform for cloud-based ERP system

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

No doubt...

No doubt it'll be the standard cheapest snouts at the trough offshoring all the work rather than keeping it based in the UK.

Do you want to be an astronaut when you grow up? Yeah, you and 12,000 others: NASA flooded with folks hoping to visit Moon, Mars

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge


Let's just treat it as the B-Ark and "accidentaly" make go off course ;-)

Fitbit unfurls last new wearable before it's gobbled by Google, right on time for global pandemic lockdown

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Still not a patch on a Garmin.

Just sayin'...

Still this pandemic has done wonders for my running and cycling fitness overall.

Who's going to pay for Britain's Aunty Beeb to carry on? Broadband users, broadcaster suggests to government

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Can we just clear up a pointh here. You don't need a TV licence to own a TV receiver. You need a TV licence to watch TV programmes at the point they are broadcast i.e. watching the 6pm news at 6pm, or to watch content via BBC iPlayer. That's it.

I have a TV but have not paid the licence fee for 6 years as I do not watch either iPlayer or TV at the time it is broadcast. I am quite happily entitled to play on my PS4, stream content from All4 and Netflix and watch DVDs and such like without a TV licence.

Yes I have had the Crapita goons round on a couple of occasions, but a swift "p**s off" is all it takes to make them go away.

At the Supreme Court, Morrisons pops data breach liability win into its trolley – but it's not a get-out-of-compo free card for businesses

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Re: Error or malicious act

I agree to a point. But those "limits" can very much be reduced to small percentages. Stating that Morrisons did "everything" they could to prevent data loss is not entirely consistent with allowing him to manually transfer the entire HR data extract onto a USB stick for delivery to KPMG.

Assume Morrisons IT and OpSec teams haven't heard about secure encrypted file transfer or DLP solutions yet?

How many days of carefree wiping do you have left before life starts to look genuinely apocalyptic? Let's find out

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

More importantly...

I'm most upset. My local Co-Op has run out of Frazzles.

I'm not sure about my life turning into version of The Road (shame about the movie eh?) but my Daughter and I are still hoping for a real life playthrough of The Last of Us.

Talk about ill-gotten gains: Coronavirus KOs Xerox's $30bn months-long hostile takeover bid of HP Inc

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I like the way they slip in the pointless "highly qualified" into the phrase about their board candidates. It's almost as pointless as when restaurants put the word "pan" in front of "...fried anything" on the menu; because thanks for that... I was worried for a moment that it was going to have been fried on an old storage pallet!!!

You're not fooling anyone on that vid-conference call: Walmart says shirt sales soaring, pants not pulled up

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Video calls are for people with no imagination.

Hunting for IT staff? Lost your job during the pandemic? Sysadmin vacancies – and a free job ads offer – inside

Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse Silver badge

Well done El Reg.

This is a great initiative and will hopefully be 100% more effective than a lot of the agencies out there who seem to be mostly staffed by people who seem to know nothing about the technologies or roles that they are recruiting for in the first place, which in turn actually makes the getting of a new role twice as hard as it needs be in these difficult times (or any time for that matter).


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