I think it's just author nowadays. Actually I think it always was.
I was outside Pippa's flat in 2006, sleeping and listening to the BBC World Service, expecting her to join me for an action against a Mel Gibson statue, and two drunk guys attacked my car while I was in it. As you do.
And I froze for a minute, because WTF?
I had a big hammer on the passenger seat, because, well I already explained, so I picked it up and gave chase. They had a minute head start on me. I really couldn't catch them on foot but I really could have thrown the hammer and hit one.
And this is gradually going through my mind, weighing it all up, and stop. Accept the car damage from two drunken idiots rather than kill one of them and become a murderer.
Now if I had two hammers that story might have ended differently.
But I really can throw a hammer, I'm a Scot. We practice as children.
Biting the hand that feeds IT
