I'd really, really, really enjoy it if the law firm retained by Office Depot had solicited a subsidiary law firm of theirs to file a series of fake or over-exaggerated class action law suits against Office Depot and then, when the board of directors had asked for legal advice about what to do in this circumstance, just suggested that their law firm could sort all the trouble out for them for a nominal fee.
*Lawyer shuffling through letters about the legal claims against them*
"2,618 reported cases... Let's see..."
*shuffle*
"Ooh yeah, that's a really nasty one that is. Could do you a lot of damage. Wipe your bank account completely, it could - hold your entire company to ransom. Luckily I know how to fix it. It's not easy, I mean, you couldn't do it yourself or anything. It might come back if you don't sort it out properly. You've just got to know what you're doing, is all. Best pay for an expert to sort it out - it'll be cheaper in the long run."
Biting the hand that feeds IT
