Re: Selective deafness
“ -removable/replaceable battery” - usbc battery.
“ upgradeable RAM” - likely to buy a new machine before you need to do that.
“ ditto SSD” - thunderbolt external disk.
“ -useful number of ports” - usbc/thunderbolt dock. These ports are infinitely more useful, plug in the right cable you have the port, be that hdmi, power, 10Gb ethernet, sdcard, whatever you need at the time.
Currently models have been around for only 3 years.
Quit the bullshit anti apple rant because you cannot move on from old inferior technology.