"I arranged to loan the project team the majority of my "sick" techs when they got back to catch up with the bunch of incredibly shit jobs that had been put off forever by the project team a long way away from the rest of the department, purely of course to ensure that any lingering sickness bug that they might have brought back with them didn't spread throughout the department."
Something tells me you received your Bastard Manager From Hell papers with a good reason ;)
As for unions, shoot to kill.