Re: "Ethernet is so much better"
"but a floppy disk taped to the back of a turtle would have had a faster transfer rate."
Ah, you've not seen the IP over giant African snail? A small cart is hitched to the snail, where the wheels are two optical disks. Lousy latency, but throughput was impressive over short distances, and could be increased by swapping the CDs for DVDs, BluRays, whatever the next tech is.