Testing? Ha ha!
"The boss of British bank TSB has insisted it carried out rigorous testing ahead of a systems migration that saw thousands without access to their accounts for over a week..."
I think from bitter experience we all have, we know exactly how that went....
CIO to QA testing manager:
"Sorry we brought you into the migration project so late, we just ran out of time. If you can get some testing done, you have a couple of days left at the end before the drop-date for the migration."
QA and Testing manager to developer leads:
"F**king typical, I'm always last to know! You devs, when you get this thing up and running in UAT, get some users to give it the once over, eh?"
Devs:
"F**king typical, we're always the last to know! UAT testing users, when you get given this thing, can you log into the test system and check it works. Don't go nuts, we haven't got time."
Users get told 3pm Friday afternoon before the drop-date:
"Yeah we logged in, John ran a report and Fred said he could login OK. Yeah, we'll sign it off. Pub anyone for a quick jar before the weekend?"
Biting the hand that feeds IT
