Please leave a message after...
** ring ring, ring ring **
"Hi there, you've reached the offices of Her Majesty's Royal Navy. We're sorry we can't answer your distress call right now but currently our offices are closed until the New Year. Possibly even next New Year. Please leave a message after the tone and we'll get back to you as soon as we have capability. Please note that requests for air cover will be handled on a first-come first-shot-down basis from some time in 2020. Alternatively, please press 1 for maintenance and breakdown updates, 2 for funding shortfalls and requests, 3 for booking guided tours of our empty aircraft carrier decks, or 4 to leave a rousing Christmas message for all (and we mean all) our sailors currently at home on leave. For all other information please contact someone else. Thank you."
** Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep **
A/C
Biting the hand that feeds IT
