Re: "sadly no deep-fried Mars bar"
When I was a student at St Andrews the chippie on South Street used to do deep fried Cadbury's Creme Eggs as an "Easter Special"
No, I did not try one. Even thinking about it now gives me the dry boak.
One of my work colleagues also tells of a chippie in Stonehaven that sells deep fried Tunnocks Teacakes, which might be even worse.