Re: Keep them talking
I like to do that with phone scum too. I once had someone trying to get me to email or fax them financial information, I managed to keep them on the phone for an hour and a half. Firstly I continuously sent them emails (from a bs account, of course) with the attachment missing and acted surprised each time the guy I was talking to told me that there was no attachment. I then emailed a specimen that I got off of google images and which I pixelated to the point where it was just barely not legible. Then the upside-down version of same image, then sideways, then more pixelated. On to the fax machine...
He finally gave up on email and asked me to fax the information and, after the requisite seven minutes required to send a non-existent fax on a non-existent fax machine, I triumphantly told them that I had sent the fax. The person on the other end had to leave his desk to check the fax machine. He eventually got back and told me that he hadn't gotten the fax, so I "sent it" again. After about five attempts he asked me what the display on my non-existent fax machine said, I said "load error 372". He spent *forever* trying to trouble-shoot my fax machine I finally used an online faxing service to send them the same pixelated image from earlier, followed by 30 pages of pure black.
The person I was talking to, in spite of the pixelization, eventually realized that I was faxing him the wrong version of the document he was looking for and called me on it. I replied, through thinly veiled laughter "hold please" and proceeded to give myself a hernia as I listened to him screaming obscenities.