Reply to post: Bumble sounds great

Bumble sounds great

I like the idea and sound of that Bumble app. A dating site that puts the onus on the women to make first contact is great!

As someone who spent a not insignificant amount of time on various dating sites (when I was single), I can say it was really disheartening and humiliating experience. Let me posit the following scenario:

A friend of mine who was also using dating sites at the time said to me "It's a numbers game. You need to be sending out 20+ messages a day in the hope that one or two may get back to you."

I agreed wholeheartedly with his logic. However, when you read through profiles on these sites, you find a recurring pattern from the ladies side, and it's this; a lot of the ladies profiles featured sentences such as "Come on guys. Don't just send me messages like 'Hey, how are you?' or 'How was your weekend? Did you get up to anything fun?' Be inventive. Make me laugh."

I appreciate that ladies get bombarded on dating sites with c*ck shots etc. But when you've spent around 20-30 minutes, reading their profile and composing an opening message that is not war and piece, references things they have put in their profile (to demonstrate that you have read it) and generally show an interest rather than just spam them with the usual opening lines, only to have your message deleted without even being read? And you've got to try to do this in a numbers game? I didn't have 6-7 spare hours a day to invest in writing 20 opening messages! So guess what? To hit the numbers game, I resorted to the "Hey, how are you?" tactic. Yes, it's generic. Yes, it lacks imagination. But why invest that time and effort to only ever face rejection? While it wasn't a resounding success, I did get a couple of dates (whereas the more considered and targeted approach bore nothing at all. So much for you getting a more tailored approach experience ladies).

So, an app that puts the emphasis back on to females to make first contact is great. You know they are (potentially) interested in you and you've not wasted your time on another fruitless odyssey of just trying to get an initial reply.

Anyway, time to climb off the soapbox.

AC, because.