Oh My
After reading this horrific news, I rang Otto Lidenbrock to see if he had any old maps that could be of use for a mission to capture these oscillating cores before they destroy the earth. After a bit of what sounded like finding an ear trumpet and putting in teeth, he shouted that he did indeed have maps of unknown tunnels in the earth, however, Alex was in possession of them and he is unfortunately in rehab for heroin addiction. He could not remember if Hans was still alive, but was confident that if Hans was alive he may know where the rehab is that Alex is in and that I should sent a letter to Hans post haste because the mail carriage is cutting back to once a month due to budgetary pressures and an aging horse. The line then mysteriously went limp and I turned the crank in feverous and passionate desperation to no avail. I suspect a conspiracy is unfolding here where there anywhere everywhere Bondsonian proportions of hillbillean reaction will be required. With the interior of the earth being shaken or stirred this may be the only logical response.
Biting the hand that feeds IT
