back to article Revealed: The amazing premise behind Ridley Scott's Monopoly

The man who apparently persuaded Ridley Scott to helm a film based on Monopoly has described the amazing premise which reeled in the director. Yes indeed, this is a special treat for the board game movie adaptation fans among you, who've been known to ask, for example, just how on God's Green Earth they expect to translate …

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  1. Stephen Hunt
    Go

    Another movie idea...

    Bloke wakes up in the morning goes to buy a coffee and reaches for his wallet but all he has for a hand is a semi-circular plastic hook. He's confused and embarrassed and rightly so because the girl - who looks like she is made out of plastic - reaches across the counter and says: "How you gonna pay for a coffee with hands like that?" Bloke looks in the mirror and finds he is also made out of plastic. In fact he has just woken up in Playmobil City.

    It has all the sights - plastic clip on hairdo's, plastic hats, fixed inane grins, Optimus Prime appearing to cause havoc.

  2. RobH
    FAIL

    OMG!

    So has anyone pointed out to Hollywood that the idea won't travel 'cos we all have different boards and placenames????

    Just like when we all look blank when they get excited about the girls game 'rounders' and getting oh so dressed up to play rugby...

  3. Andy ORourke
    Joke

    @ Bootnote

    *Presumably he meant "What do I have to do..."

    No, Presumably he meant "WHY do I have to....."

  4. Bassey

    Sounds familiar

    Isn't that basically the plot of Jumanji?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    At least it's original.

    Make's a nice change.

  6. The Original Ash

    Ah, so a bit like Jumanji?

    Only shit.

  7. Martin Gregorie

    Bee done before

    Books, films and stage plays based on board games are pretty old hat and generally a bit naff. I reckon the only person to have done it right was Lewis Carroll.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    'I created a comedic, lovable loser...'

    Oh fuck, it's another Adam Sandler movie.

  9. Glen 1
    Joke

    hee

    more like "what!? do i *have* to be a part of this movie?"

  10. Bilgepipe
    FAIL

    There's hope for me yet

    Perhaps they'll be interested in my movie screenplay based on Tufty's Road Safety Game. I also have a few ideas around "Tonka Dump Truck: The Movie." I'd better get in touch.

  11. Richard_C
    Go

    Why not

    I see no problem with this at all. Many movies have been made about kids games -

    the opening sequence from "Raiders Of The Lost Ark" was merely a over dramatised version of Kerplunk...

  12. Simon C

    Or was Sir Ridly Misquotes

    and actually said

    "Why do I have to be part of this movie?".

    Lets be fair though, if faced with some of the more iconic films of our age as ideas on a notepad, there would be a certain element of cynicism about us.

    Reading this "idea" promotes those same feelings, but lets not knock it too much, that kills peoples creativity.

    I doubt it'll be a "classic", but could be entertaining and one to take the kids too perhaps...who knows?

  13. Samuel Williams

    Hmm, great.

    How about a film based on Buckaroo?

  14. Sarev
    Paris Hilton

    So the secret is...

    So the secret to a great film pitch is to say "and" as many times as possible?

  15. Tom 11
    Unhappy

    Smashing

    Thanks for the plot, now i don't have to watch this once great man soil himself him public.

  16. Tom 11

    oops,

    thats IN, in public. coffee please.

  17. Seamaster
    FAIL

    Needs Dennis Hopper casting...

    ...as a giant tortoise and it'll be a hit!

  18. Pirate Dave Silver badge
    Pirate

    Hope the movie is better

    that the Monopoly City Streets Online game that Hasbro unleashed on the world two months ago. Buggy, half-baked, slow, buggy. And did I mention buggy?

    Yes, I'm still playing it...

  19. amanfromMars 1 Silver badge
    Pint

    Stranger things have happened/are happening.

    "How you gonna pay for a coffee with that? Come back when you've got a bankable idea based on dominoes, or whatever."

    A bankable idea based on the knocking over of dominoes which creates a surging cascade is easier, methinks, Lester. And just the sort of thing to emerge over a few pints of the Best Bitter down at the Boozer and Loser 42 Win Win ..... and for scribbling down on the back of a beer mat or two. It appears to be quite a familiar birthing process, by all accounts. :-) Cheers.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Kerplunk?

    That's the game were you poke your little brother in the eye with a pointy stick?

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    I have a good suggestion or two...

    The emotionally disturbed jail warden played by Arnold Schwarzenegger.

    Loser buys rather large Red Hotel, but has to bulldoze a few small green houses, the occupant of which could be the love interest, of course.

    I'll take my percentage from the gross please.

  22. Dale Richards
    Go

    @Tom 11

    How are you going to pay for that coffee? Your wallet is full of Sticklebricks!

  23. Stuart Castle Silver badge

    Wesley Snipes

    could be a character that goes directly to jail without passing go and without collecting £200...

  24. ratfox
    Pint

    heads or tails!

    A movie about it! Brilliant. I'm copyrighting the idea, and I want $10 million for it

    A beer will do, actually.

  25. Naadir Jeewa
    Grenade

    He's a ghost

    Presumably, in the ending he wakes up and "it was all a dream".

    He walks out of his house to find it painted green and the screen fades to black with the words "or was it?"

  26. Steen Hive
    FAIL

    @Mike Richards

    "Oh fuck, it's another Adam Sandler movie"

    There absolutely nothing lovable - or funny - about that insufferable tosspot.

  27. Richard 102

    Good gravy

    The sooner LA slides into the Pacific Ocean, the better.

    Sincerely,

    The Rest of America

  28. George of the Jungle
    FAIL

    Sounds lame

    This is more proof the film industry is out of new ideas.

    Mike Richards: Your comment made me spew my tea!

  29. TheArtfulTodger
    Go

    Best idea ever....

    ...so all you doubting Thomas' will be eating your disparaging words when Adam Sandler wins the beauty pageant and gets a bank error in his favour and some "random" punter spends a night in his shitty hotel on the cheapest street that everyone says was a waste of money, but actually the piddling amount of rent he receives from this one person staying there is just enough for him to buy the hotel on park avenue, get the girl and ride off into the fucking sunset in his sports car, wearing his top hat, with his scotty dogs tongue lolloping in the wind.. you will all be sitting there blubbing into your popcorn and rethinking your whole lives.

    Buy shares in monopocorp (or whoever the fuck owns monopoly these days) because literally everyone will be buying a brand new movie branded board the day this movie comes out and playing it non-stop until their muscles atrophy and they eventually die of lead poisoning from touching the pieces so much.

    This movie will change everything.

    Or it could be totally shit, hard to say.

  30. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    I'd like you all to review my screenplay

    For "Tic-Tac-Toe: The Movie"!!

  31. Shonko Kid
    WTF?

    Asteroids: The Movie

    They could probably re-use the central plot device for that outing, though that might be a little too much like The Last Starfighter for comfort!

  32. Steve X
    Paris Hilton

    Microsoft contribution

    If it can be watched in IE 8 they could employ Dolly Parton as the community chest...

  33. Captain DaFt
    Jobs Halo

    Wish me luck!

    I've just finished the screenplay for my new movie, on a 1.2 million dollar advance, that has all the bigwigs in Hollywood abuzz with excitement!

    If it passes the final OK, then get ready for <drumroll> Naughts and Crosses, The Movie!

    (Still fighting over renaming it "Tic Tac Toe Terror", this is a religious film, NOT a horror film!)

    Went with the Angel Jobs icon, since Disney is the most interested.

  34. unitron

    Too late

    "I'd like you all to review my screenplay

    By Marketing Hack Posted Friday 13th November 2009 19:21 GMT

    For "Tic-Tac-Toe: The Movie"!!"

    Already been done.

    They called it "War Games".

  35. Shaun Hunter
    Welcome

    The movie "Risk" was realy good

    waiting for hungry hungry hippos.

  36. sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD
    WTF?

    lame

    snakes and ladders > all.

  37. CJ 1
    Welcome

    I'm waiting for...

    Mouse Trap: The Movie

    They could even tie it in with a Tom and Jerry license

  38. Anonymous Coward
    Flame

    What about that kiddies favourite?

    "Pull my finger"?

    Or would that be a stinker too?

  39. nobby

    @CJ 1

    they did it. didn't you notice?

  40. Mithvetr

    Just a pitch

    A film pitch isn't necessarily going to bear a lot of resemblance to the final product. In Lester Haines' own words: "Quite how Monopoly: The Motion Picture eventually turns out remains to be seen".

    I think I'd have to agree with Simon C that it's better to encourage creativity than slamming an idea just because our immediate impression of it isn't too favourable. Yes, I know it's hard times even in the big movie business and that filmmakers can't really afford to bugger about too much. But as others have said, there have been board-game movies before. They might not have been works of artistic genius, but if they entertain for an hour or two and make the studio a little money, no-one really loses out, and the studio might survive to be able to make the next timeless epic.

  41. Geoff Campbell Silver badge
    WTF?

    Is it really possible....

    ....for an entire industry to jump the shark? Apparently it is.

    GJC

  42. Witty username
    Terminator

    Mousetrap

    Mousetrap = the SAW movies with less death i would imagine.

    i second hungy hungry hippos!

  43. Rob
    FAIL

    Or...

    ... they could base the whole film on the Star Wars version of Monopoly, then after that they could do a spin-off just called Star Wars.... oh... hang on sec.......

  44. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Excellent!

    So when are we going to be seeing "Old Kent", "Lye-sester Square" and "Regent" on our screens?

    They ARE going to be making properly localised versions?

  45. Barn
    FAIL

    Seems to have less plot...

    Than Minesweeper the movie (youtube it), and a lot less funnies.

  46. phix8
    FAIL

    Possible grammatical correction?

    I think we ALL hope he meant 'WHAT? DO I HAVE TO BE PART OF THIS MOVIE?'

  47. mittfh

    Other ideas...

    Do a UK based version. OK, you'd have to play fast and loose with the geography, as some streets are nowhere near each other, but hey, that's artistic license for you.

    Do an action / adventure based on chess - we've already had a sneak peek courtesy of the "Many Adventures of a Boy Wizard Genius" who shares his initials with a variety of brown sauce.

    Operation - screwball comedy based around a bunch of apparently hopelessly incompetent surgeons. But evidently it would probably turn out that they're so good they could practically do the operations with their eyes closed, and muck about to relieve boredom of performing the 456th quadruple heart bypass of the year...

    "Scrambled Letters" - a pair of Indian software developers decide to produce an electronic version of a popular crossword-based board game for use on a popular social networking site, but then get into legal trouble with Hasbro / Mattel because they didn't ask permission beforehand.

    Then there's a video game conversion crying out for a movie remake - an adventure/comedy where the protagonist tries to prevent 100 clueless creatures with green hair and oversized blue jumpers from winning a Darwin Award... and somewhat unusually, the backing track will be exceedingly dodgy arrangements of public domain classical / traditional music.

    I noticed someone suggested Minesweeper earlier - I dare someone to come up with a credible plot for Freecell - The Movie. Muahahahaha!

  48. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Re : Marketing Hack

    Then we'll have TIC - TAC - TOE TWO!

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