back to article Sensible, practical anti-terror tech shocker

US federal boffins reckon they could be on the track of an easy-to-use kit or sensor which could tell if people had been exposed to nerve gas or other chemical weapons. This would allow medics dealing with victims of possible future terror attacks to separate out genuine casualties from the swarms of "worried well." Principal …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Widdly-weep

    Will said electroimmunoassay device go "widdly-weep" in an Izzard-does-Star-Trek manner?

  2. Graham Bartlett

    Already available

    Sensors to detect exposure to poisonous gases are already available - contact your local pet shop and ask for a Rodent Mark I. Available in calibrable sizes (from "mouse" to "guinea pig"), the sensor and support equipment will set you back £50 at most - significantly undercutting any DARPA/Qinetiq product ever. Monitoring uses the easy MPXP detection model (Monty Python ex-parrot). Sensors also include popular entertainment programs such as WhiskerTwitch, CageClimb and EatPeanuts at no extra charge.

  3. Nev

    What ever happened about all those Anthrax "attacks"...

    Hmmmm....

  4. Demian Phillips

    Forgotten Anthrax

    The DOJ and FBI have stopped breafing Congress. They claim it is because congress awas leaking information about the case.

    Recently I have heard rumors that the anthrax is somehow related to Battelle, a 3.8 Billion dollar a year not for profit (yah right) contractor. They are based in Columbus Ohio.

  5. Alex

    Too Dumb ?

    I like reading El Reg. You've been my daily squeeze for ages. The irreverent 'squeal Neocon/RIAA-piggy squeal' type of articles you carry make me chuckle.

    I do like to have a bit of news content in my editorial every now and again though to be honest. You know, if I feel just a little bit more informed about the world around me it makes me feel I've done something almost worthwhile spending my time here.

    Once your contributors start censoring their own reporting on the basis the readers won't understand the more complicated stuff [yes I know it was all meant in fun] I start to worry that maybe you guys are taking things a little too far....

    (And lets not even get started on those God-awful advertorials you keep carrying. Maybe you could flag them with some secret-sign for the RSS community?)

  6. Jasmine Strong

    We're not all idiots, you know

    "The [scientific thing] is amplified several hundreds to a thousand times because of the [other scientific thing we have done]," Lin said. "This level of sensitivity will allow detectors to [do some major scientific stuff]."

    That was pretty good, Lewis. Would you like to patronize us some more?

  7. Morely Dotes

    Can't be done, it's not expensive enough

    "Apparently, Lin's five-year biosensor programme is costing the US taxpayers just $3.5m"

    That'll be binned, then. No project costing less than a billion dollars ever survives the porkbarrelling negotiations.

    And @ Graham Bartlett: this device is to determine if a *human* has been exposed, not to see if the local area is contaminated. We use canaries for that (infinitely more sensitive, and as a nice side benefit, they sing prettily while they're otherwise idling).

  8. Derrill

    Self-Censorship

    @ Alex and Jasmine

    Erhm.

    So you know what the fiddly bits in a scientific paper are for then? I'll expect a brief in the morning, as what he put in he brackets means as much to me.

    Oh, what's that, you can not write a brief up because you don't know what it says because he censored it? And he didn't include a link that you might click on to get more informa... oh there it is!

    You two may be even stupider than the people who complain there's no IT angle. How long have you people been reading El Reg, anyway?

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