back to article Accenture announces 'Accenture Song' – not a tune, but a rebrand

If you want to place a bet on the winner of 2022's weirdest corporate rebranding, here's one likely to make the shortlist: an announcement titled "Accenture Announces Accenture Song". No, dear reader, that missive does not mean that Accenture has penned a corporate anthem. Which is a shame because The Register quite fancies …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Might be just an internal initiative?

    To keep their drones happy…

    1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: Might be just an internal initiative?

      To keep their drones happy…

      If that's their aim, perhaps they need an Accenture Snog?

  2. David 132 Silver badge

    I am disappointed.

    The Reg of days passim would have gleefully larded an article such as this with sarcastic references to joss-sticks and whalesong. Instead, not so much as a mention. Don't tell me your new image - no longer "Biting the Hand that Feeds IT", I notice - is too straight-laced for such mockery?

    Cancelling my subscription in disgust, etc etc.

    1. cookieMonster Silver badge
      Flame

      Re: I am disappointed.

      Agree, after reading the headline I was looking forward to the savaging typically dished out to this type of rebranding and of course the verbal diarrhea.

      Must try harder

    2. Piro Silver badge

      Re: I am disappointed.

      Biting the hand that feeds IT is still in the footer of the page, luckily. Still, I agree that the sarcasm needs to be upped a notch.

      1. ssharwood

        Re: I am disappointed.

        Tough crowd.

        FWIW I took the approach of letting this one speak for itself - not sure sharper satire is needed on this occasion.

        1. Piro Silver badge
          Thumb Up

          Re: I am disappointed.

          We are but lowly commentards, at the end of the day. At the very least, you can take solace in the fact that this crowd is somewhat more respectful than many others online.

        2. Outski

          Re: I am disappointed.

          Fair, but you could at least have included a response from luminary bluesky visionologist* Steve Bong

          *just made it up, feel free to use and abuse ;o)

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: I am disappointed.

            "a response from luminary bluesky visionologist* Steve Bong"

            Damn, you beat me to it.

            I wasted too much time trying to find out which of the big consultancies once tried to change its name to Monday.

        3. TheRealRoland
          Happy

          Re: I am disappointed.

          Whalesong! WHALESONG!!!!!

    3. Mike 137 Silver badge

      Re: I am disappointed.

      The increase in sponsored content is worthy of notice in this context. It's hard to balance biting the hand that might pay you for promo with attracting the resulting revenue.

    4. arthoss

      Re: I am disappointed.

      I personally was surprised that the Accidenture song wasn’t mentioned. I thought it was funny and I was an employee back then

      1. ssharwood

        Re: I am disappointed.

        Do tell - not one I have encountered.

        1. arthoss

          Re: I am disappointed.

          sketch https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DWLv4tQsz4

          but the song, I can't find. I might be mistaking it for some Oracle song, there's some overlap in my head related to that period of my life.

          we were sharing it by email, back then, so, hard to find.

          1. StewartWhite

            Re: I am disappointed.

            Computer Associates had a truly terrible corporate "anthem" (see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2YrwzxRZxY&ab_channel=tedloveschicken) that they had as hold music if you ever had the misfortune to have to phone them.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Anonymous Coward

              Re: I am disappointed.

              After 25 years, I feel I am just about ready to relive the absolute horror that was - as a lowly employee of Philips Research Labs - being subjected to this gem of the art:

              https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8Mlf3dQusk

              Ahh, those were the days. Apart from the occasional bit of corporate bullshit like this, Philips was a great company to work for. And at least, knowing the leadership, you could console yourself with the knowledge that a phenomenal amount of weed had probably been smoked in whatever room they came up with the idea in.

  3. the Jim bloke
    Trollface

    In a content-devoid industry

    it is as relevant as anything else.

    Just like Rap is country music - without the country, or the music, Accenture Song can be Dubstep, without the melody, lyrics, emotional depth, or social commentary..

    1. TeeCee Gold badge
      WTF?

      Re: In a content-devoid industry

      Surely if you take all that out of Dubstep you get, er, Dubstep.

    2. Mostly Irrelevant

      Re: In a content-devoid industry

      Right, or country is pop from 20 years ago with a southern drawl and a steel guitar.

  4. Mike 137 Silver badge

    The 'creatives' strike again

    "The name Accenture Song conveys an enduring and universal form of human craft, connection, inspiration, technical prowess and experience [...]"

    This (and the logo) are just two more examples of output from modern 'creative agencies' which spend their entire working time trying to demonstrate how 'creative' they are while for the most part slavishly following often fast changing fashion trends. Clarity, relevance to the client's purpose etc. etc. are a foreign language to these 'talented people'.

    I can't forget the day one of my professional associations rebranded. The 'creatives' replaced the simple and perfectly recognisable logo with a cyan/magenta squiggly line that is easily mistaken for innumerable other organisations' cyan/magenta squiggly lines. I guess cyan/magenta squiggly lines were 'trending' at that moment.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "CEO and creative chairman David Droga"

      Droga means the English "drug", "narcotic" in some languages. Guess that explains a lot. They might have exceeded a little in some company meetings.

    2. Sam not the Viking Silver badge

      Re: The 'creatives' strike again

      One company I worked for had a change of name...... It was a subsidiary of a very large international brand. The 'old' name was well known in the industry and had a good reputation (and I thought did a good job). A grand project renamed the junior company to a non-word which, when spoken, sounded appropriate to the type of project undertaken, but only in French..... There was a huge roll-out, with freebies, advertising and massive re-branding involving reprinting a lot of documents.

      After about a year the 'new' name was quietly dropped.

      1. Phil O'Sophical Silver badge

        Re: The 'creatives' strike again

        but only in French

        Unlike the big telecoms merger between GEC and Plessey, which created GEC-Plessey Telecommunications, a mouthful generally shorted to "GPT".

        This always caused amusement among French colleagues, where it would have been pronounced the same as "J'ai pété" - "I have farted".

        1. gerryg

          Re: The 'creatives' strike again

          And we lost the great Plessey logo of a squiggle on an oscilloscope looking like "plessey" in cursive script.

          Slightly off topic there's "Hector the Tax Inspector"

          Unlike all the examples we laugh about now, the second was produced in house for about 50p, and the former probably by someone who understood the business, not a "creative" in sight.

          And this is probably as good an anecdote about branding as you will find

          https://www.thedrum.com/news/2016/01/04/bbc-marketing-head-admits-w1as-satirical-rebrand-cursed-new-bbc-three-logo

  5. Pascal Monett Silver badge
    Trollface

    "post-pandemic accelerated metaverse continuum experience consultancy"

    Dear Lord, my bullshit bingo card just had a meltdown . . .

    1. Piro Silver badge

      Re: "post-pandemic accelerated metaverse continuum experience consultancy"

      I'm sure that's what it sounds like when someone in marketing throws up

  6. Potemkine! Silver badge

    I would love to be the bastard who pocketed millions of $ for selling such nonsense

  7. FozzyBear
    Alert

    Accenture Swan Song

    They missed a word !

    1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

      Re: Accenture Swan Song

      Yes, it will go for a song when the strategy fails to deliver on the bottom line

  8. RobLang

    Do we know which song it is?

    Perhaps the Reg commenters know? Is it the Birdie Song?

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: Do we know which song it is?

      "Share and Enjoy"

  9. Howard Sway Silver badge

    uniquely operating at the intersection of creativity, technology, intelligence and industry

    That's right, because nobody else in the IT industry uses creativity, technology and intelligence do they?

    If you're going to pay a fortune to some "branding imagineers", at least have the braincells to check that what they come up with isn't total bullshit before you proudly announce it to mass derision.

    Not that this will stop their clueless corporate clients from queuing up with wheelbarrows full of cash, desperate to buy a "metaverse strategy".

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      Re: uniquely operating at the intersection of creativity, technology, intelligence and industry

      No you misunderstand

      They are trapped on the middle of the traffic island while creativity, technology, intelligence and industry wiz past

  10. Raithmir

    Design

    How many millions was the design firm paid to add a multi-coloured "Song" to the end of the logo?

  11. Ian H-B

    How on Earth can a major advisory firm not bother to test the general, normal, public's reaction to such corporate BS?

    1. Ken G Silver badge
      Trollface

      They did!

      They hired another Big 4 consultancy to assess the client reaction to various names and followed their advice.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    IBM also had a song...

    https://youtu.be/L9oh3gqOEKU ever onward IBM....

    1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

      Re: IBM also had a song...

      IBM had an entire songbook. It was real. I held a physical copy in my own hands when I worked at IBM long ago (OK, circa 1990). In addition to the usual music and lyrics, it had black-and-white photos of choruses of besuited IBMers dutifully singing some of the numbers.

      Corporate songs, songbooks, and even full-fledged musicals were A Thing in the US for a while.

      And surely everyone knows the KPMG song? That one's famous. There are a bunch of remixes on YouTube.

      1. Claverhouse Silver badge

        Re: IBM also had a song...

        Aren't such corporates the first to sneer at Trade Unionism and its old-time song-books ?

        .

      2. Antron Argaiv Silver badge

        Re: IBM also had a song...

        ISTR there was a more cringe-worthy version of the KPMG anthem with chorus...

        1. Antron Argaiv Silver badge
          Thumb Up

          Re: IBM also had a song...

          Yep...they had one, Ihave a copy on my other machine, but seems they have DMCA'd all the copies on the web (out of embarrassment?)

          Best I can do right now is the lyrics:

          https://everything2.com/title/KPMG+corporate+anthem

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Paris Hilton

      Deloittes released a CD...

      Deloittes released a CD back in 1999 called "Second Wave"

      https://www.groovecollector.com/mp/deloitte-consulting-compillation-artiste-divers-second-wave/r/119756969/

      (And, while searching for that link, I see that they are still using the "second wave" branding even now - a mere 20+ years later.)

      [Icon: Paris because she looks like she's trying to sticker her fingers in her ears!]

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Accenture Dance

    Accenture Monkey and Accenture Organ Grinder coming soon

  14. IHateWearingATie
    Pint

    There was an unofficial song...

    .... I seem to remember a very ambitious manager in the USA created something and tried to get it to be officially adopted. It was doing the rounds in the early 2000s - I suspect in the USA as a serious thing, in the UK it was sent as a joke.

    Don't have a copy of it unfortunately, but it was as bad as you imagine

  15. spold Silver badge

    "on track to become a $14 billion business".

    I guess it is not going for a song then. Are they singing from the same hymn book? The messaging sound more like bad Garage Rock.

    Got to pay for those creative marketing types.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    I Apologize Wholeheartedly and Absolutely

    Decades ago I worked for Arthur Andersen Consulting before it became Andersen Consulting before it became Accenture before it became Accenture Song and I apologize for any contribution I might have made to this fiasco of a company.

    In atonement, I will identify the song.

    It's from a children's (appropriate) puppet (also appropriate) show hosted by Shari Lewis called Lamb Chop's Play-Along.

    "This is the song that doesn't ends

    Yes, it goes on and on, my friends

    Some people started singing it not knowing what it was

    And they′ll continue singing it forever just because"

    Repeat ad infinitum or ad nauseum, whichever comes first.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_47KVJV8DU

    1. spold Silver badge

      Re: I Apologize Wholeheartedly and Absolutely

      It's OK - they are charging you by the minute for singing it.

    2. Sam not the Viking Silver badge

      Re: I Apologize Wholeheartedly and Absolutely

      I was a victim of Anderson. When they were introduced, I thought, in my naivety, it might be related to the themed-puppet producers. How right I was.

      Our company was bloated with too many managers and too many outdated systems. The manager-to-worker ratio went up and the number of systems increased by one.

      At least those colleagues who remained weren't given a song to sing. In retrospect, I think Anderson did me (and many others) a favour.

  17. Zuagroasta

    The only song I will hear gladly which is connected to AssVenture in any way is a funeral dirge for that heap o'crap

  18. YetAnotherJoeBlow

    Wow - so this is what our best and brightest are doing? For once I am at a loss for words.

  19. nijam Silver badge

    > intersection of creativity, technology, intelligence and industry

    Sounds like the empty set to me, said a mathematician.

  20. jawshogg

    Any similarity to the ITunes colour scheme is purely coincidental ;)

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This stuff would be laughable, save for the fact that Accenture Song is on track

    it's laughable regardless. In my language, there's a saying taken from an 17th c. work on 'natural world', for entry / description of a horse the author wrote: the image of a horse is for everyone to know (see).

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    > No, dear reader, that missive does not mean that Accenture has penned a corporate anthem.

    Accenture India: "Hold my beer..." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uDNtdadO2no

    1. Antron Argaiv Silver badge

      A good effort, but fails to include the mandatory production number dance scene at the end.

  23. aerogems Silver badge

    Seems about right

    After doing a stint with Accenture, this definitely seems to fit with their general approach of focusing on all the wrong things. Racist hiring practices? Who cares when we can rebrand to some name that will just baffle customers? A more cynical side of myself wonders if they didn't also reincorporate to try to get out from under lawsuits and investigations into their various business practices.

  24. Antron Argaiv Silver badge

    ...and more

    https://blog.kickresume.com/2018/12/10/worst-corporate-anthems/

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: ...and more

      Sort of in the spirit of We Built This Starbucks (or maybe not)

      Uptime Funk (2015)

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYRlTISvjww

      .

      .

      .

      See also

      https://www.404techsupport.com/2016/04/03/uptime-funk-parody-uptown-funk-suse-linux/

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