back to article Poly Network says it's got pretty much all of that $610m in stolen crypto-coins back

Poly Network says virtually all of the crypto-currency funds, valued at $610m, stolen from it by a thief have been returned. The mysterious crook siphoned off the dosh earlier this month by exploiting a vulnerability in the Chinese exchange's smart contracts that handle the movement of tokens between blockchains. The thief, …

  1. Pascal Monett Silver badge
    Mushroom

    "Believe it or not"

    I don't believe it, you fucking asshole.

    An actual White Hat would never have taken the money.

    You are a failed criminal, which just might be the highest honor you can pretend to.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What next indeed

    The mysterious crook siphoned off the dosh earlier this month by exploiting a vulnerability in the Chinese exchange's smart contracts that handle the movement of tokens between blockchains.

    and

    So what next for the mystery miscreant?

    A nervous wait to see if the Chinese authorities renege on their promise not to send an assassination squad round to punish him for making them look incompetent in return for giving the money back?

    1. Mark 85

      Re: What next indeed

      Quite possible they hired him to work for them under the condition he returned the money also. Just a bit of duress goes a long way.

    2. IGotOut Silver badge

      Re: What next indeed

      That would be the Chinese that banned Crypocoins selling?

      1. Alan Brown Silver badge

        Re: What next indeed

        You wouldn't believe that's happened from the number of messages I get trying to get me invcolved in chinese crypto trading

        (Yes, I know they're a scam. They don't seem to have gotten the memo)

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Well, butter me sideways

    Who would have thought that imaginary “money” could just disappear like that?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Well, butter me sideways

      It's not imaginary! See, there's a video of those bills burning up, isn't that proof enough it's all worth something?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Frozen by Tether

    And there you are.

    Traceable.

    Trivial to remotely freeze.

    Your fake transaction currency couldn't even be used to pay OnlyFans crotch fiddlers.

    Add the core problems:

    It collapses as soon as more people want out than in,

    It is constantly being inflated by miners,

    Every transaction is recorded for posterity forever,

    If ever it became a real transaction medium, the blockchain size would be too big for users to hold, but you can guarantee that the FBI holds a *full* copy. So even the blockchain part is utterly useless.

    If you use it, you're likely to be exit scammed, because the players pushing it know the false nature of the product they push. They are already deep into the scam, so what's a little deeper?!

    1. doublelayer Silver badge

      Re: Frozen by Tether

      "Trivial to remotely freeze."

      That describes Tether, but does not describe most other cryptocurrencies. You should investigate how Tether works--it's very different from most other ones and there's a lot to complain about in it. Some of your points are intrinsic to most existing cryptocurrencies, whereas others are remediated by design decisions. As I'm not really an adherent, my defense will stop there.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Frozen by Tether

        Polynetwork froze *all* the types of crypto they claimed was stolen.

        I'll even add one more:

        Even if you could pay "Only Fannies" with crypto, the point at which you turn cash into crypto becomes logged, so everything you do is available to every creepy Jane behind these exchanges and their monitoring.

        As you buy into the crypto and exit the crypto, each of those entry and exit monitors, gains details of *all* the transaction data you ever did via your wallet. (Including your OnlyFannies purchases).

    2. Snake Silver badge

      Re: traceable

      Exactly.

      Blockchain security outfit Slowmist boasted earlier it had discovered "the attacker’s mailbox, IP, and device fingerprints through on-chain and off-chain tracking," and others may be on the thief's tail.

      So much for that 'no government intrusion / anonymous / private transactions' part. It was right in the story.

      So if crypto transactions aren't the 100% anonymous, private business that they're been promising, is it worth going through all the transactional friction in the first place? And what is the use of a "currency" that changes value every minute of the day??

      This whole thing has become nothing more than a pyramid-scheming joke.

    3. Loyal Commenter Silver badge

      Re: Frozen by Tether

      Most of your (perfectly valid) criticisms are not unique to cryptocurrencies.

      For example, ask Northern Rock about "It collapses as soon as more people want out than in"

      ...and any central bank that practices "quantitative easing" about "It is constantly being inflated"

      Actually, on that second point, you are aware that the "supply" for cryptocurrencies such as Bitcoin is finite, aren't you? And that, of those that don't have infinite supplies, the principle one, Ether, has recently implemented transaction fee "burning" to counter that very problem.

      What I don't agree with is the name "cryptocurrency". They aren't currencies, and the name just leads to people erroneously drawing parallels between them and fiat currency.

      Really, they are a store of "value" based upon the scarcity of some resource (like gold, or shares in Apple or a stamp collection). The resource in most cases is "proof of work", which is problematic when that work translates into power consumption. The snidey "why crypto is worthless", and "why crypto is a scam", or "why crypto is a bubble" comments are getting a bit tiresome though, especially when they seem to keep getting proven wrong. That last one I've heard reliably several times over the last 5 years, usually just before the price of Bitcoin jumps again.

      I'm not foolish enough to put any significant money into crypto, of course. If I had done five years ago when I dabbled with mining (and it was still achievable without spending vast sums), I'd have multiplied my money many times over. Comments like yours, though, sound like sour grapes from people who wished they had. As it is, I'm now sat on a couple of grand's worth of "crypto assets" in return for a modest investment of about £150 in what was then a curiosity.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Frozen by Tether

        Sour grapes, yes. This stuff is volatile and risky. But it's not going away. I'm puzzled that so many readers are so ignorant about the technical details of these instruments - as evidenced by many of the declarations repeatedly given in these comments by presumably astute technical types. But that's each individual's privilege, so, well, steer clear.

  5. Lil Endian Silver badge

    Meanwhile....

    ...back at the ranch, the curtains are drawn, but the house is real.

    1. chivo243 Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      Re: Meanwhile....

      I bet he no longer lives at the ranch... but has moved faster than the PFYs Onion Bhaji

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not exciting enough

    Would have been more fun if he had put it all in a USB stick and told people it was in a plastic bag, "located roughly from 135°W to 155°W and 35°N to 42°N"

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "if they decide to pursue the person involved."

    WTF!?

    he stole 600 mil...hmm...should we pursue him...?

    Not only did he do one of the BIGGEST heist,

    but others must not see that you can try and steal stuff, and if it doesnt work

    simply return it...

    He said "sorry for the inconvenience..".

    I dont have words.

    He thought his messages would help him down the line when he faces law enforcement

    but on the contrary it'll show he didn't have real remorse and was simply trying to intelligently (FAILED miserably)

    massage his replies so it helps him.

    Put him SUPER long behind bars or we'll suffer as a nation like nothing we can imagine

    With future would be att-hackers.

    1. doublelayer Silver badge

      Yes, that's all true, but they still tend to pursue criminals who kept things over criminals who, in the long term, got nothing. Doing otherwise runs the risk of hung for a penny, hung for a pound, as well as costing extra in police time. I'm happy if they still pursue him, but there are reasons to doubt whether they will.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Totally not a PR stunt, right?

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