back to article Salesforce to buy Slack for $28bn in cash, shares – and vows to make it the new face of Customer 360

Salesforce has signed a definitive agreement to buy Slack for $27.7bn in cash and stock, and plans to make the collaboration tool the interface for Salesforce Customer 360, the system it sells to create a single customer ID and profiles. The CRM giant’s announcement today stated Slack will become “an operating unit of …

  1. Slipoch

    The saga begins in a witchery way

    *sits down with a thump*

    [random underling]

    "Are you ok?"

    [IT professional]

    "I felt a disturbance....it was like a million it professionals all cried out in disgust and horror"

    [random underling]

    "But isn't SAP the evil one?"

    [IT Professional]

    "Salesforce is merely the lesser of two great evils, and I do not believe in choosing any evil, even the lesser evil. Better to not choose."

    1. Jim Mitchell

      Re: The saga begins in a witchery way

      "If you choose not to decide

      You still have made a choice"

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: The saga begins in a witchery way

        TIK TOK next assimilation must be ZOOMed in

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Thank $deity I am no longer in a position that requires me to use Salesforce or any communication application and for which the positive reviews of either seem to be written by idiots with a vested interest in selling it.

    Kill it now. Burn it with fire

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Mmmmm, word salad, yummy!!

  3. JDPower Bronze badge

    "will give companies a single source of truth for their business"

    Er, what???

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "All your data are belong to us"

      1. EBG

        well parsed, sir.

      2. John Smith 19 Gold badge
        Unhappy

        " Anonymous Coward "All your data are belong to us""

        Exactly.

        Welcome to the future.

  4. Kevin McMurtrie Silver badge

    Slack Enterprise Connected Synergy Cloud Platform Edition

    Sign up for seminars now to begin building your team of certified Slack Enterprise Connected Synergy Cloud Platform Edition administrators. With 3 months of high impact training sessions, you are on the road to maximizing Slack adoption throughput and gathering the insightful analytics to put you on the path to success. Topics include departmental access controls, AI driven data fencing, impact analytics, discussion insights, emoji trends, communication friction alerts, targeted improvement areas, and a progress tracking application suite.

    1. A Non e-mouse Silver badge

      Re: Slack Enterprise Connected Synergy Cloud Platform Edition

      Amanfrommars - is that you??

      1. logicalextreme

        Re: Slack Enterprise Connected Synergy Cloud Platform Edition

        Please use the approved "You are $name and I claim my £$reward" template going forward.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Please use the approved "You are $name and I claim my £$reward" template going forward.

          Templates.

          I fucking hate templates.

    2. sad_loser
      Happy

      Re: Slack Enterprise Connected Synergy Cloud Platform Edition

      that should be 'impactful analytics'

      1. Gordon 10
        Happy

        Re: Slack Enterprise Connected Synergy Cloud Platform Edition

        I think he was right the first time ;)

  5. John Smith 19 Gold badge
    Unhappy

    Salesforce must have an appropriate use case for *someone*

    Sadly I don't know who.

  6. Nick Ryan Silver badge

    Well, there goes the planet. Or a viable alternative to Microsoft Teams anyway.

    Slack is now no longer an option for anything other than a money-making machine for Salesforce limitations.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Element?

      Has anyone tried Element, the free and open source messenging system built on Matrix, which could be worth a look?

  7. This is my handle
    Go

    worst piece of software except for all those others

    Apologies to Winston Churchill. I used to hate Salesforce, till I tried some of the alternatives... With #slack, it's rather the opposite. After years of complaining about chat systems (for 90% of all use-cases I still prefer email to getting a real-time interrupt that says "Joe is typing...." .... still typing ... ....; plus, I long ago drank David Allen's Getting-Things-Done "the fewer inboxes the better" kool-aid) I have come to hate #slack much less than the others.

    1. gobaskof

      Re: worst piece of software except for all those others

      Really. My preferred messaging options for work are in order:

      Email

      Phonecall

      Teams (I am a linux user but it seems to work and I feel dirty for saying so)

      WhatsApp (I work in Africa a lot, need to WhatsApp)

      Matrix/Element

      Just shouting while miles away

      Smoke signals

      Putting a message in a bottle and waiting

      Getting punched in morse code

      Just not communicating, getting fired and finding a new job

      Slack

      I thought this purchase was interesting until I saw: "Look, Salesforce buying Slack won't change anything... Not for Slack users", then I thought. What's the point?

      1. corrodedmonkee

        Re: worst piece of software except for all those others

        Got more chance with the smoke signals than to get me with an email, let alone a phone call.

        My work phone literally lives behind my monitors, and I cannot reach it without getting up off my chair and leaning around them to get it.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle

    But... why?

    ^ Nothing more to add.

  9. sabroni Silver badge

    There is still no compelling reason to use Slack over Chatter.

    There was no competing reason to use Facebook over MySpace.

    The communication system with the most people on is the one that wins.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: There is still no compelling reason to use Slack over Chatter.

      And that’s why email wins. Ubiquitous, platform independent.

    2. Crypto Monad Silver badge

      Re: There is still no compelling reason to use Slack over Chatter.

      > The communication system with the most people on is the one that wins.

      I don't think anybody has yet given the obligatory xkcd: #1810

      Updated by: #2365

  10. Karlis 1

    Ah well, it was good fun while it lasted.

    I can feel the slimey gore oozing up from the ground already, just was it was with yammer, skype, linkedin, whatsapp, etc...

  11. Gordon 10
    WTF?

    $28 BN!!!!

    Is this Salesforces Autonomy moment?

    1. rotmos

      Re: $28 BN!!!!

      Makes IBM $34BN for Red Hat look lika a bargain

  12. J. Cook Silver badge
    Joke

    I feel a brilliant comedy line was missed here...

    "Salesforces takes up (the) Slack for $27Bn."

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon

Other stories you might like