back to article Behold the drive-thru of the California Highway Patrol: Fry me a river, has 'CHIPS' stopped working again?

Welcome to another in our series of digital signage behaving poorly. Today, the revelation through the medium of Windows that "chips" is, of course, the correct word for delicious bits of fried potato. There's a saying in the Bork office, located deep within the bowels of Vulture Central: "It's not McDonald's. It can't be …

  1. R J
    Mushroom

    CHefs Industrialized Potatoe Strips

    1. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
      Joke

      Dan Quayle, is that you?

      1. John Brown (no body) Silver badge

        Shirley it's spelled Quayl??

  2. Scotthva5

    Commercial Hospital-grade Inedible ProductS

  3. Roger Kynaston

    Crispy Hyper Incised Pattie Service.

  4. Manglemender

    Customer Health Improvement Prevention System?

  5. macjules
    Unhappy

    Since it is McDonald's ...

    Computer Helps In Preventing Service

    Thus ensuring you are blocked from receiving a dose of mechanically recovery chlorinated chicken, fries like soggy blotting paper and milkshakes that should come with the warning, "Animal of origin unknown".

  6. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
    Coat

    The Chips are down

    Big Mac, you're on your own

  7. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

    Goodbye

    Mr Chips

  8. Antonius_Prime
    Joke

    "Welcome to McBorkald's: Over 8 Billion Borked!"

    Should be a headline on one of the next McBorkage's...

  9. richardcox13

    Chips Have no Implication of Potato Starch

    So much processing applied that there is little remaining link to the original ingredients.

    1. Muscleguy

      Re: Chips Have no Implication of Potato Starch

      There are other things in there as well. If you look on the website the fries are not listed as gluten free. I strongly suspect they dip their anaemic scrawny potato pieces in flour to better crisp them up and of course allow the use of cheaper quality spuds.

      I’ve done that with sweep potato fries. GF flour, sweet potato flour in fact, touted as a crisperising agent.

  10. heyrick Silver badge

    Chewing Hard Indigestible Potato Skins, perhaps?

    I should be so lucky. I have gone off the place. One lukewarm undersized burger and half filled (if I'm lucky) pack of chips too many and, sorry, I'll take my intestines elsewhere.

    1. Andy Non Silver badge

      Re: Chewing Hard Indigestible Potato Skins, perhaps?

      One the one occasion I went into a McD and ordered a cheese burger they told me I couldn't have one. They were still serving the breakfast menu apparently. So I bought a rather nice cheese burger from a van in the market outside their shop. Not been in a McD since.

    2. Shooter
      Joke

      Re: Chewing Hard Indigestible Potato Skins, perhaps?

      "The food was terrible! And the portions were so small!"

  11. You aint sin me, roit
    Coat

    No chips for you!

    No fries either.

  12. Ochib

    Common Hybrid Interface Protocol System (CHIPS) perhaps

  13. Wyrdness

    Do you want fries...?

    Those proper chips in your image look infinitely better than the horrible thin fries that Macdonalds serves. I'm feeling hungry just looking at them.

    https://regmedia.co.uk/2015/06/05/chips_teaser.jpg

    1. Gene Cash Silver badge

      Re: Do you want fries...?

      They used to be a hell of a lot better until a SJW named Phil Sokolof got to 'em and made McDonald's stop... well... actually frying them.

      https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/original-mcdonalds-french-fry-recipe

      Wikipedia doesn't say how Sokolof died, but I can only hope it was a slow painful lingering heart attack. I hates him, I does, my precious. I pray he's burning in hell in a pool of beef tallow.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    CHiP's re-run on Forces TV

    Crikey, I woke up at 3:00am this morning and CHiPs was on Forces TV. Season 3, episode 5.

    The good old days, building my ZX80 and Maplin 5600s, while watching CHiPs.

  15. wheelbearing
    Unhappy

    Crikey, Hell is Probably Saltless

    As they won't serve with salt any more..

  16. DJV Silver badge

    Company Has Inadequately Paid Staff

    With thanks to Derek who came up with the above back in the 1980s when we both worked for a company called CHIPS which, at the time, stood for something like Computer Harmony & Information Processing Services (I might be wrong but it was a long time ago). We all thought it was a bit naff so there was an in-house "competition" to think up a new bunch of words for it. Once Derek's suggestion was submitted, the whole thing was dropped like a hot potato (sorry!).

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    I loved watching CHiPs as a young kid...

    > the adventures of a pair of California Highway Patrol officers named Ponch and Jon and ran for six seasons from 1977 to 1983

    I was always impressed at how they could ride along, side-by-side, close enough to comfortably talk to each other. ;-)

  18. Stoneshop
    Devil

    Coronary Hazard In Paper Sack

    Culinary Hubris Implemented (through) Processed Stuff

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Yuk

    Crappy Horrible Inedible Potato Substitute

  20. Alister

    Crisis Happened In Preston Services

  21. Anonymous South African Coward Bronze badge

    Cruddy Hot Instant Problematic Stuff

  22. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge

    Don't mention the war!

    For you tommyspud, ze warfries is over

  23. BebopWeBop

    Chips have never worked in MacDonalds.

  24. Dave559 Silver badge

    CHIPS

    I just love that some techie has taken the time and (of course) care to come up with an acronym that spells CHIPS (Car Hop Inbound Processing System would be my half-baked (insert your own punchline) guess), but also that once Big Ronald finds out about this he'll probably explode and collapse with rage that the official term "fries" hasn't been used, hehe…

  25. Fruit and Nutcase Silver badge
    Joke

    The Spud Who Loved Me

    “No Mr BondSpud, I Expect You To DieFry!”

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