back to article Wow, you guys have so much in common: Oracle hotly tipped to power TikTok’s operations as Microsoft deal rejected

Oracle is reportedly set to provide technology to TikTok – the astronomically popular China-based social network – in what could be the century’s strangest corporate match-up. This comes after TikTok was ordered by President Donald Trump to sell or spin off its American operations, or be banned from the Land of the Free over …

  1. Dinanziame Silver badge
    Devil

    I can only assume that TikTok hopes that Oracle being completely absent from the social media sector, it will give them a free rein to keep doing whatever it is that they want to do. Oracle, on the other side, I have no idea why they would want that; but I'm pretty sure TikTok won't like it when they know.

    1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

      >Oracle, on the other side, I have no idea why they would want that; but I'm pretty sure TikTok won't like it when they know.

      Conspiracy says it's a back-hander from Trump for Larry's support and a commiseration for the Generals (Traitors/Losers) not giving him the DoD contract.

      Cock-up says he is doing it because they have to do something not to become totally irrelvant

  2. UCAP Silver badge

    Credible evidence

    Trump had set a 15 September deadline for the sell-off, after saying there was "credible evidence" that TikTok was being used by ByteDance to breach US security.

    "Credible evidence" clearly means "I woke up one morning and decided so".

    1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Re: Credible evidence

      "Credible evidence" means that they wouldn't tell him who pissed on his party in Tulsa.

  3. Wily Veteran
    Joke

    What will the dancers do....

    When they start getting a per-core charge for using the app?

    This IS Oracle.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Devil

      Re: What will the dancers do....

      > When they start getting a per-core charge for using the app?

      Tomorrow - September 15th - El Cheeto's TikTok deadline.

      Coming up: TikTok Enterprise Edition. Will be part of Oracle Fusion Apps. The freebie version will only support 5 sec videos @720i.

      1. davidp231

        Re: What will the dancers do....

        "Coming up: TikTok Enterprise Edition. Will be part of Oracle Fusion Apps. The freebie version will only support 5 sec videos @720i."

        You want audio? That's an extra subscription.

    2. phuzz Silver badge

      Re: What will the dancers do....

      "Cell phone manufacturers baffled as young people opt for single core phones over multi-core"

  4. deadlockvictim

    TikTok & Oracle marketing

    Well, I, for one, am looking forward to watching teens and pre-teens extol the virtues of Oracle in 15s to some tune from Billie Eilish.

    Enterprise-level databases and analytics tools just haven't been that hot a topic with teenagers recently.

    1. Pascal Monett Silver badge

      And I don't see that changing any time soon.

      As I've already said, that Microsoft adds yet another thingy on it's already bursting patchwork of a software quilt is no surprise, but Oracle is only Oracle and only does Oracle.

      I am glad to see that the author of the article is in the same frame of mind.

      Oracle and TikTok go together like tank tops and suede shoes. It doesn't match.

      1. Clunking Fist

        "go together like tank tops and suede shoes" lordy, that's some kind of challenge there, eh?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I am totally against

    insecure products sold by a totalitarian regime run by a malevolent dictator. But enough about Oracle ...

  6. fran 2

    Isn't Ellison a big Trump fanboi? He's held a fundraiser for him

    1. Pascal Monett Silver badge

      Yes, that was written in the article you responded to.

      You might want to actually read it this time.

      1. Clunking Fist

        "You might want to actually read it this time."

        Why? I know that I get all the LOLS for half the time, by bypassing the article and going straight to the comments section.

  7. Jay Lenovo

    Locked-in for the win

    Now witness the first social media platform that will require a service contract to Tik or Tok.

  8. Chris G

    Tik Tok?

    I suggest .renaming it to Flick Flop.

  9. StrangerHereMyself Silver badge

    Technology providers

    According to other sources Oracle will merely be a "technology provider" (read: storage provider) for TikTok and nothing else. I'm pretty sure the Chinese will still be able to access U.S. customer data this way, but it will take some time to find out.

    Anyway, I don't think Trump will buy this. He'll tell them to either sell it completely or shut it down, which IMHO is the best option.

    1. DS999 Silver badge

      Re: Technology providers

      No Trump would only insist on that if his "national security" argument was legit. Since it is all about him being a whiny crybaby when Tiktok was used by teens to troll him on his Oklahoma event and make him look bad with its tiny audience, he won't have any objections to this. He's giving one of his biggest campaign donaters some free business, probably gets a kickback in terms of more donations, and thus will claim this solves all the imaginary problems with Tiktok that never existed in the first place.

      1. phuzz Silver badge

        Re: Technology providers

        "and thus will claim this solves all the imaginary problems"

        This. He'll claim to have 'won'...and that's it, that's all he needs to do to excite his supporters, just to say that he 'did the thing', even if he did the exact opposite.

        He'd claim he was responsible for the sun coming up if he thought it would make him a buck.

    2. Clunking Fist

      Re: Technology providers

      "or shut it down"

      Joe Biden will fight him on that. He is well aware that the next generation of fondleslabs will have a rub'n'sniff feature, which he thinks is a good match for TikTok.

  10. Claverhouse Silver badge
    Black Helicopters

    Microsoft, He Says:

    ...To do this, we would have made significant changes to ensure the service met the highest standards for security, privacy, online safety, and combatting disinformation,

    .

    For one brief moment I took that as them reforming their own abysmally low standards rather than those of the putative Microsoft-TikTok.

  11. IGnatius T Foobar !

    But why?

    What is the perceived value of Oracle owning TikTok? It doesn't seem to have any place in their portfolio.

    The service should simply be blocked. As a US Citizen, I trust President Trump far more than I trust Larry Ellison.

    1. seven of five

      Re: But why?

      > As a US Citizen, I trust President Trump far more than I trust Larry Ellison.

      Wow.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I heard that Oracle was going to be TikTok's U.S. "technology partner"

    So ByteDance is not selling TikTok to Oracle, but Oracle will be the guardian and owner of all of TikTok's U.S. user data. That is supposedly meant as a way to get around Trump's executive order, at least long enough for Joe Biden to (maybe) win the election and bring a more China-friendly administration into power.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Facepalm

    Updates

    The China Global Television Network (CGTN) announced today that TikTok would not be sold to Oracle (or Microsoft).

    Prior to this the Chinese Commerce Ministry announced changes to their export rules which could allow them to ban the licensing or sale of TikTok's IP (which could have been valuable for Oracle). Without this it's sale would, essentially, just be a customer list.

    Get out the popcorn.

    1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Re: Updates

      "just be a customer list"

      That's what Trump wants.

      I think ByteDance should be allowed to licence their S/W to Oracle. They could take Oracle's licensing terms as a template.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Scaremongering again?

    "Credible evidence", eh? Would be helpful if same was published, so us mere mortals can actually see what our lords and masters are protecting us against. What?.........It's all political? Shirley you must be wrong, with such a bright orange intellect and "stable genius" in charge. What could possibly go wrong? Oh......wait.....

    1. Clunking Fist

      Re: Scaremongering again?

      Really? We are still waiting for Adam Schiff's credible (and mounting daily) evidence of Trump being a Russian asset.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Won't be long til Trump has turned the country into a 3rd world tech void.

    Even his 5G is second rate spyware.

  16. Sanctimonious Prick
    Black Helicopters

    Any Minute Now

    Looking forward to Trumps insistence that all nations in the 14 Eyes spy network do exactly the same.

    /tic

  17. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Assassin

    Great, something else for Uncle Larry to kill.

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    This has all the stink of an old fashion Boss Tweed shakedown.

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