From per-processor licensing to... per-follower? Oracle said to be in talks to buy TikTok’s US operations

Database and ERP giant Oracle is reportedly preparing a counter-bid to upset Microsoft’s planned purchase of video-sharing social network TikTok. The Financial Times, quoting “people briefed on the matter,” reports that Oracle has had talks with TikTok owner ByteDance, plus investors that already have a stake in TikTok. The …

[oldtaku]

Oh yes, PLEASE do

If there's any company that can kill TikTok faster than Microsoft with sheer boomer corporate uncoolness and evil suit stupid, it's Oracle.

(I know it'd only be the US operations, but you take what you can get).

[AMBxx]

Re: Oh yes, PLEASE do

Added bonus of another reason to hate Oracle.

Is there enough popcorn in the world?

[NeilPost]

Re: Oh yes, PLEASE do

Whoever wins any takeover deal - in this dick waving contest - deserves to spaff $20, 30, 30, 50bn (shareholder value) up the wall - and get absolutely everything that is coming to them m.

Tik-Tok is worthless 2000-era Tech crash grade junk.

Bring on the Schadenfreude writ large.

Xi Jungping must be pissing himself at this Chinese Pyramid scheme.

[mark l 2]

I still don't understand how Trump and the US can dictate that Bytedance have to sell their Canada, Australia and New Zealand operations as well as their US one?

I am guessing this means that in the ROW TikTok will still be owned by China? If that is the case what happens if someone has the Chinese owned version of the app installed and then goes to visit USA, Canada, Australia or New Zealand after its been purchased by MS or Oracle etc?

[Charlie Clark]

He can't: this is electioneering.

[TheVogon]

He can ban / block the app as a "national security risk" effectively putting them out of business in the US.

[NeilPost]

VPN??

[Peter Clarke 1]

Any Similarities?

Fast forward 10 years when TikTok is worth 1/4 of its purchase price. MS sues the sellers for over valuing the company that they bought quick for an inflated price because they thought Larry wanted it.

OR

Just like Ebay, ghost bidders connected to the seller up the bid price with no intention of buying the item. (allegedly, M'laud)

[NeilPost]

Re: Any Similarities?

0.1%.

Will make Nokia Mobility look like the deal of the century.

[Doctor Syntax]

"Why Oracle would want any part of TikTok is hard to understand."

FOMO.

What else do they have that's a recognised consumer brand?

[Charlie Clark]

Or part of a complicated financial engineering package that see TikTok parked at Oracle ready to be sold on or back when the politics are less volatile.

If TikTok US is sold, then a TikTok worldwide IPO, which would make by far the most money for investors, is unlikely.

[TheVogon]

Java? On no wait a minute. Everyone that doesnt want to be virus infected by every web page they visit already removed that.

[Steve Davies 3]

Please Oracle buy this [redacted]

It will soon be worthless now that Trump is promoting 'Triller'

Will Triller become tainted because the king of uncool is promoting it?

[TheVogon]

Re: Please Oracle buy this [redacted]

Trump will be gone by then.

[Anonymous Coward]

Favor from Big Red to the Orange One

Trump could Huawei TikTok but one of the sane election advisors convinced him that having millions of young American voters pissed at him might not be the best thing. Hence the sell it order and the post election deadline.

But then the only bidder turned out to be M$ which has irritated Trump too many times.

I suspect the conversation went something like this:

Donny - Larry, could you do me a favor and outbid Microsoft for this ticky thing?

Larry - Sure Donny but you owe me one.

Donny - No problem. Even if the lefties win I'll have months to remember my friends.

[Anonymous Coward]

If you thought that Microsoft buying Tik Tok U.S. was a weird fit...

"Hi, I'm Larry Ellison. You might know me as the purveyor of database, enterprise resource planning, general ledger and human resource management software, and oh, I also own this popular mobile app that shares short videos among teen-agers."

Huh??

[Anonymous Coward]

Does Larry have a secret rap album he wants to promote?

[hoola]

Maybe he just needs to be able to write some money off in the accounts somewhere. Or does buying this and then have it flump give the means to bury something already in the pipeline?

Maybe they could use it to improve the support desk?