back to article Windows 7 goes dual screen to shriek at passersby: Please, just upgrade me or let me die

Welcome to another edition of signage behaving badly, The Register's look at borkage of all shapes, sizes and flavours from around the world. Today's contribution, from a Reg reader who preferred to be identified only as "Ian from Essex", depicts Windows 7 in a state of distress brought about by negligence. Windows 7 is like …

  1. JetSetJim
    Windows

    eh?

    > Windows 7 is like that arthritic old cat who lives with an elderly relation. It smells a bit, is a pain to look after and demands near constant attention

    err, not having any trouble with my Win7 installs, and never really touched them to maintain them. As opposed to what Microsoft have been nagging me to update to for the last 2 years (or so I hear)....

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: eh?

      "err, not having any trouble with my Win7 installs, and never really touched them to maintain them."

      Same here, but it's only a bootstrap for Steam client and nothing more, no internet, no email ...

      1. WonkoTheSane
        Linux

        Re: eh?

        "it's only a bootstrap for Steam client and nothing more, no internet, no email ..."

        PSA - Steam runs on Linux now, and will play most Windows games with it's Proton library.

        1. IGotOut Silver badge

          Re: eh?

          "PSA - Steam runs on Linux now"

          He's happy with his Win7. Why is there this bloody obsession with you must move to Linux!

          1. Updraft102

            Re: eh?

            He's happy with his Win7. Why is there this bloody obsession with you must move to Linux!

            The obsession is more of "you must move away from Windows 7". That is what the above article was about. If someone has already rejected 10, and if he wants to move away from the fading Windows 7, Linux is an option.

      2. Grogan Silver badge

        Re: eh?

        I've only used Windows for games since probably 2000'ish. Nowadays, while I still have a Windows 7 install handy, I very rarely boot to Windows to play games. There's basically one I care about that I can't get to work, Sniper Elite 4, and I don't play it that often anymore. That Windows install could almost go, but it doesn't have to. I never updated anyway, just Service Pack 1 and the Platform update (and runtimes as necessary, usually done by the game installations themselves).

        My next build isn't even going to have a Windows install. I really despise Windows 10 (and 8.x before that).

        1. Blackjack Silver badge

          Re: eh?

          Wine can run the much hated but still used Winrar and you can run Space Cadet Pinball on Wine. So the only reason I keep my old Windows 7 PC around is games.

          Not everything is Steam. I have games in CDs and DVD that still work and need Windows. Sure for the Dos ones I can use Dosbox but Windows 98 stuff like Jazz Jack rabbit 2 The Secret Files?

          1. Quantum Leaper

            Re: eh?

            Old games I want to play are on Good Old Games, Jazz Jack Rabbit Collection is like $10 (US) so I only have one or two more really OLD games I still want but they are not on GOG.

            1. Blackjack Silver badge

              Re: eh?

              Dosbox can run really old DOS games but you may need to adjust the speed.

              There is also the Web Archive (Archive.org) that put many old DOS games to play online. And from other systems too. Want to play an Apple II game? They probably have it.

              I found my old MDK CD, still had the price on it. The game works both in regular Wine and Playonlinux.

              Earth Worm Jim Special Edition for Windows 95 needs a virtual box of Windows 95, 98 or XP to work.

              Earth Worm Jim 2 CD is much easier to play thankfully.

              Games made with multimedia Fusion 2 or older don't work well or at all on Wine. Thankfully those are not as picky as the darn Worm.

    2. Sailfish
      Meh

      Re: eh?

      Win7 still runs all the programs I've become productive on along with most games. Add to that a beautiful skeumorphic Aero desktop with true rounded corners windows over the soul-crushing utilitarian mess of Win10 flat design desktop along with obscuring access to system features and there's no incentive for me to switch. In fact, the only problems I've had with Win7 over the past few years were from Windows Update.

      As to newer games not supporting Win7? Not a problem. I installed a second hard drive with Win10 on it that I can easily switch boot drives from.

      If Microsoft expects Win7 people to move to Win10, they need create real GUI alternative toward Win7's GUI (including Aero) for most power users. When the time comes where I have to decide, I'll try a *NIX solution before making Win10 my first choice.

    3. andy gibson

      Re: eh?

      Same here. Got a Dell E6440 laptop. Core i5. 250Gb SSD. 8Gb RAM.

      Runs like an absolute dog with Windows 10 - slow, sluggish, unresponsive. But flies with Windows 7.

      1. tony trolle

        Re: eh?

        my older E6420 is happy with win10, you did update all chipset drivers ?

      2. Stuart Castle Silver badge

        Re: eh?

        Sounds like there is an issue with your install (perhaps drivers). My MacBook almost matches the specs you give, and runs Windows 10 fine. No good for games, but that is because it uses a low-end Intel GPU.

  2. iron Silver badge
    FAIL

    > unheeded by the operators at c2c's Thorpe Bay station

    What is a c2c?

    Ditto Thorpe Bay station.

    This article needs more detail for those of us who don't live in Essex.

    1. Daedalus

      Don't worry about the article. It's from an alternate universe where Boris Johnson is PM instead of Basil Brush, not that anybody could tell the difference.

      1. Mike 137 Silver badge

        A big difference actually

        "where Boris Johnson is PM instead of Basil Brush, not that anybody could tell the difference"

        Actually one could tell the difference once. The original Basil Brush was witty and entertaining and took the mickey out of politics.

        1. The Oncoming Scorn Silver badge
          Childcatcher

          Re: A big difference actually

          He did make some rather sharp digs, for what was a children's show*. What the fuck that obese mound of felt on CBBC is supposed to be doesn't carry a ounce of the class of the original.

          Icon - Closest thing to Mr Derek.

          *Why more adult orientated acts like Manhattan Transfer were booked I'll never understand in favour of something more easily acceptable to the cub scouts in the front row.

    2. JetSetJim

      There's at least one other subtle hint in the article that it's to do with train station signs...

    3. Gav_Oracle

      C2C is the name of the rail franchise.

      So called because you want to go from A to B but have to go to the train station, C. Then there are problems with the trains so you end up staying at C.

      I think they try to pretend it actually means City to Coast.

      1. Michael Habel
        Pint

        I'd rather be at point E which would be the nearest Pub to Point C

        1. The Oncoming Scorn Silver badge
          Pint

          Mr. Prosser wanted to be at point D

          Point D wasn’t anywhere in particular, it was just any convenient point a very long way from points A, B and C. He would have a nice little cottage at point D, with axes over the door, and spend a pleasant amount of time at point E, which would be the nearest pub to point D.

          His wife of course wanted climbing roses, but he wanted axes. He didn’t know why—he just liked axes. He flushed hotly under the derisive grins of the bulldozer drivers.

          Icon - Muscle relaxant You'll need it.

    4. ClownBeer

      C2C is a train operating company.

      Though a W7 Bork is the least of their problems compared to their big pink sh*t box ticket machines.

      It's a masterclass in p*ss poor interface design & how to build a simple machine to issue tickets.

    5. 1752
      IT Angle

      https://www.c2c-online.co.uk/stations/thorpe-bay-station/

  3. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

    I was in a local library the other week to use their Ancestry subscription. Yup - still running W7.

  4. ma1010
    Linux

    I did

    Microsoft has spent the last year begging Windows 7 users to move to a better place.

    But it involved switching to Linux. Along with many others, I'm still waiting for MS to come up with their own viable alternative to Windows 7. Perhaps next year?

    1. TVU Silver badge

      Re: I did

      Windows 8.1 + Start8 is a Windows 7 replacement that is supported until 2023 and that's enough time to look for a long term replacement.

    2. Michael Habel

      Re: I did

      Linux is nice, but I find the fruity flavor of BSD (MacOS) to be prefferable.

  5. cantankerous swineherd

    is free bsd better than windows 7?

    1. P. Lee

      It depends what you want it for. Win7 is probably a rubbish server. I don't think I'd pick BSD for a desktop.

      I think I have a Win10 installation around somewhere which I occasionally boot and update steam on. Mostly Steam on Linux suffices.

    2. Michael Habel

      Yes when its the Cuppertino flavor of BSD. a.k.a MacOS

  6. Marty McFly Silver badge
    Facepalm

    Keep us posted...

    >"Microsoft has spent the last year begging Windows 7 users to move to a better place."

    No doubt the great Reg will let us know when that comes along.

  7. IceC0ld

    Naturally, we contacted c2c to see if it (or whoever was responsible) for the signage had plans to either upgrade or splash the cash necessary to keep that version of Windows in security patches a little while longer, but we have yet to receive a reply.

    PLEASE tell me that when the answer comes in, it is along the lines of :-

    we would love to replace our advertisement monitor OS, however, recently our ads revenue has fallen off a cliff, and we are unable to determine as to why that should be, once we are in a position to upgrade, we fully intend to get it back up and running and earning us ad revenue once again.

    PRETTY PLEASE tell me that arrives :o)

  8. David McCoy

    Apple Up, Windows Down?

    Based on the increase in people bringing in new Macs to have me transfer data from their old win7 machines Windows 10 must be being loved by the beancounters at Apple.

  9. Zog_but_not_the_first
    Trollface

    And Windows 10?

    "Windows 7 is like that arthritic old cat who lives with an elderly relation. It smells a bit, is a pain to look after and demands near constant attention".

    Let the metaphors cascade...

    Like a dog raised on a puppy farm without proper attention and training that is likely to bite you when you least expect it...

  10. pc-fluesterer.info

    Why the hell does public sineage need underlying Windows?

    a RasPi running Linux would be quite sufficient - and save energy!

  11. Winkypop Silver badge
    Alert

    It's still operating fine

    It's an advert for Windows Update!

  12. David Shaw

    There's a "digital supermarket" in Milan, near the Bicocca Village shopping mall & cinema complex.

    By digital, I mean it is primarily a supermarket, selling cheese - cat food - etc

    but it is a left-over from an expo of a few years ago - and has around a thousand interactive 24" screens.

    These screens are supposed to interact with customer, as you wave your hands near a particular item,

    say - frozen artichokes - a pop-up should tell you all about it, price etc. how fresh, nice recipes

    needless to say, digital decay has set in, and an extremely high number of screens are/were showing

    the full gamut of Redmond's best & brightest errors. I was laughing so much, that I was incapable

    of actually taking any photographs. I'm sure it is still kaputt, guasto, SNAFU'd.

    If anyone dares to visit, (I think flights to Milan are around £3 return at present), it's just behind the

    KFC - it's called "Fior-Food" " "Supermarket of the Future" by (Italian) Co-Op

    Supermercato del future, Cibo e Incontri, Via Friedrich Von Hayek, 20126 Milano MI

    In view of the pictures or it didn't happen meme. I'll try and visit that currently surely

    deserted shop centre and see if anyone has learned how to deal with "the future" yet.

    1. David Shaw

      found some shy JPG's

      (2D layout) https://cdn.archilovers.com/projects/d9232647-c635-4c30-9603-7cddb7e47f3d.jpg

      (3D artistic) https://cdn.archilovers.com/projects/5501e6e9-5c35-43aa-83e9-1885110d03d0.jpg

      so it's just hundreds of monitors, not thousands - their HTML video wall (one of the many showing error messages) was just 54 super giant monitors in a wall. I tend to agree that if it was 100s of RaspPi's, the supermarket of the future - a place to get food and meet people - might have been a bit more responsive..

      the food was nice tho'

  13. Updraft102

    Windows 7 is like that arthritic old cat who lives with an elderly relation. It smells a bit, is a pain to look after and demands near constant attention – and will frequently leave a dirty protest if it doesn't get it.

    Are you quite sure it is Windows 7 you are talking about and not 10?

    When I used 7, it worked well, day in and day out. The 10 fanboys keep saying 10 is much more stable than 7, but for my own PCs, Windows 7 could not get much more stable than it was. No need to look after it or give it attention... it was just an OS, which is supposed to fade into the background and let the applications get the applause.

    Windows 10 is more like Lucy from I Love Lucy, always cooking up some scheme to get center stage without having any actual talent that would make one worthy of being on a stage. Windows 10 is always demanding attention... not like the old reliable workhorse Windows 7.

    I too have left Windows-land, or maybe it's more that Windows left me, as the saying goes.

    When I started using Windows, it didn't monetize you and try to take over your computer. You didn't have to beta test your own software. It didn't come out a never-ending stream of service packs each 6 months. It didn't send your local search queries to Bing. It just did its thing... serving the owner of the hardware, and MS was not constantly tinkering with new ways to fleece its users. Back then, when a Windows flopped, like Vista, you could keep using what you had (XP/2k) until the next version came along. The next version was 7, which was very popular despite its familial similarity to Vista.

    In the Vista era, MS didn't send you malware through the update system, whose sole function was to break Windows Update on newer machines, deliberately exposing users to third-party malware.

    Instead of forcing people to accept an OS they did not like, MS improved Vista and made it into what users wanted. Now they are using their monopoly to force people to accept 10, and they've made it quite clear that customer satisfaction is no longer a concern of theirs. No carrot, all stick.

  14. JohnFen

    That would be easier

    > Microsoft has spent the last year begging Windows 7 users to move to a better place.

    That would be a whole lot easier if Microsoft had an OS that actually is a better place than Win 7.

  15. ITMA Silver badge

    You are joking - aren't you?

    "Windows 7 is like that arthritic old cat who lives with an elderly relation. It smells a bit, is a pain to look after and demands near constant attention – and will frequently leave a dirty protest if it doesn't get it. But your great aunt loves it."

    What utter bollox!

    If Windows 7 is "Your great aunt's cat", then Windows 10 is that stroppy teenager Kevin (of Kevin and Perry) right down to not doing as it is told and refusing wake up - took bloody months to find that to get WOL working again, I to had disable all sleep modes settings AND turn "fast start" OFF. No such hassle with Windows 7 on the very same machines.

    "Microsoft has spent the last year begging Windows 7 users to move to a better place."

    Prey do tell! Where is this "Shangri La"?

    Microsoft clearly hasn't learnt from past mistakes - Windows 8. If users are still reluctant 4.5 years after 10 was released, surely that should be telling them something? Offer users a truly "better place" and begging them to go there is the last thing you will be doing. More like having to get out the way before they are trampled in the ensuing stampede.

  16. Sam Therapy

    Our arthritic old cat died last week.

    My Windows 7 box, though, is still going strong.

  17. zemm

    Was there supposed to be a photo or something? It would have been nice to see what the article was talking about

  18. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    All M$ care about is getting everyone on their cloud services. They really dont give a crap about on premise anymore. Im sure Windows as a service is coming to counter chromebooks. Come see Windows Lite edition! Boots in two seconds and honest guv we dont farm all your data!

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