No partitions today. Tomorrow, the managers order whiteboards, many boxes of paper, coat racks. You get the idea.
Behuld – zee-a internet ouff tuilet tissuoe at Meecrusufft Sveden. Bork bork bork!
The Register took a trip to Microsoft's shiny new Stockholm HQ to check out what the company's employees have to look forward to over the next decade - and came away more informed about smart metred loo roll. While the bulldozers continue doing their thing in Redmond (and social media is alive with staffers dealing with the …
COMMENTS
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Monday 9th December 2019 15:19 GMT Anonymous Coward
I hate open plan. The noise and distractions from others is *so* annoying. There are a number of people around here who I routinely fantasise about caving their heads in with a mallet....and these are people who have been in an open plan environment for years. I hate to image what it;s like transplanting people who are used to an individual office/cube into an open plan environment
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Monday 9th December 2019 13:54 GMT Anonymous Coward
I'm sorry
says the Loo Roll in a 'Clippy'd' Swedish accent.
"You have excceded your alloted number of sheets of toilet paper for today"
"May we recomment some adult diapers? Available from...."
Nanny Microsoft strikes again.
I am so glad that I'm retired.
They'll be monitoring everything their employees do every minute of the day (and night given half a chance)
Smart === Surveilance.
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Thursday 12th December 2019 23:38 GMT Public Citizen
Re: I'm sorry
That would be the point when yours truly would be opening up the nearest bottle and emptying the contents into whatever ventilation ports were handiest.
On a second go-round I would make sure to have something very sticky available to hand and repeat the procedure.
Until AI adopts Asimov's Three Laws of Robotics these sorts of "disagreements" will continue to proliferate.
And since AI don't have hands or the ability to use sledge hammers guess who's going to be the eventual winner? It's called learning by having your terminals reduced to fodder for the scrap bin, which is analogous to a 3 year old having it's fingers slammed in a door after being warned.
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This post has been deleted by its author
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Monday 9th December 2019 15:19 GMT Anonymous Coward
Oh, sweet Zarquon ...
Looks like someone gave manglement a copy of 'Snow Crash'[1] to read and they took it a bit too literally ...
[1] - see here ...
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Monday 9th December 2019 15:48 GMT Michael H.F. Wilkinson
Next their bog rolls will be equipped with defocused temporal perception ...
and will know when they will be needed before the users do. Nice idea on the face of it, but they will become prone to sulking in basements.
I'd better be going. Doffs hat (black fedora today) to the late, great Douglas Adams
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Monday 9th December 2019 16:55 GMT LeahroyNake
Smart meter saved a few £
While I have a smart meter for Gaz and Leccy (it's a UK thing apparently) my partner does not. When the lights started flickering then went out last week we were going to phone an electrician but we noticed that the 'old fashioned' meter kept restarting so phoned the distributor as an alternative. Turns out the previous occupier was on the super duper fast service list, 6 hunky men turned up and fiddled with the pole outside within an hour and all was good.
I'm pretty sure the new smart meters have backup batteries and I therefore would have paid around £150 for an electrician that couldn't have fixed the problem.
New and smart my arse.
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Monday 9th December 2019 17:24 GMT Doctor Syntax
Re: Smart meter saved a few £
It's surprising how quick they can turn up when there's a problem like that. A few months ago there was a problem with the neutral. Once I'd reported it they were quite panicky about making sure everyone in the houses affected shut things off to avoid damage. It's probably the possibility of being on the hook for damage that motivates them.
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Monday 9th December 2019 18:15 GMT Anonymous Coward
The Point of Open Offices
As the article makes clear, Microsoft has built an office that cannot support all staff on site. This is the point of open offices. Companies want you to work from home thus saving them the cost of rent, heating and cooling, electricity for your PC, and, of course, toilet paper. The only time you'll need to go to the office is to turn in your PC and get fired for not putting in enough productive work.
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Wednesday 11th December 2019 04:48 GMT W.S.Gosset
"Smart-meters" = deliberately deceptive badging/naming
> €2,000 Vattenfall smart meter aimed at adding a bit more transparency into electricity consumption.
... the UK government admitted this year that only 50% of households would have smart meters by next year, and maybe 85% by 2024
Errr. People ARE aware that smart meters are NOT designed for the consumer but for the supplier, right?
Their purpose is to be a remote-control for your house.
Their primary function is to be able to turn-down your intraday supply AKA brown-out, so that they can "demand-manage" AKA brown-out. The traders on the short-term electricity desks love them: good for P&L, GREAT for quietly getting round demand-forecast errors (e.g. renewables' collapses).
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You'll note that it was the industry lobbying for smart meters. And lobbying hard.
Hands up everyone who believes the utilities companies are sainted martyrs for the common weal, wonderful self-sacrificing philanthropists with no thought but for the protection of the little guy?
Avoid smart meter installation for as long as you can.