First one I thought of.
It could only be Florida...
Careful with that Axe, Eugene: Excessive use of body spray causes school bus evacuation
A salutary warning arrived this week for those seeking to impress at the Christmas disco after a school bus had to be unloaded due to an excessive discharge of body spray. First reported by ABC Action News for Tampa Bay, the bus carrying Buffalo Creek Middle School students required evacuation thanks to an overpowering odour …
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Thursday 12th December 2019 12:07 GMT Anonymous Coward
Re: Florida Almost Man, strictly speaking.
"I'd say the over-application of this stuff is the lesser of two evils"
Based on my experiences on London public transport, I would suggest the jury is still out.
Lynx body spray or anything from Lush can easily overpower a whole compartment while most body odour rapidly diminishes as you move away from ground zero.
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Wednesday 11th December 2019 18:03 GMT Mike Moyle
Slight threadjack...
The son-in-law is running his first D&D campaign as a DM and several of their friends, my daughter, and I (Yes; we're a family of geeks!) are playing, to give him a relatively safe and supportive first group. In our first fight, our half-orc finishes the last of the goblins attacking our party with one swing of his great axe.
DM: "Your axe cleaves the goblin's body in two. Blood and guts just spray everywhere."
Me: "Urrgh...! I hate axe body spray!"
Easiest EP I ever earned!
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Wednesday 11th December 2019 19:08 GMT Giles C
Quote
We vultures spend quality time every day rammed nose to armpit on London's finest subsurface transit system, but have yet to detect much beyond the usual fragrance of quiet desperation. And no, we don't plan on seeing if a liberal spraying of Axe will see us alone in a tube carriage.
End quote
Well you would probably end up being charged as terrorists would it be worse than the woman eating hard boiled eggs though.... mind you team it with some Epoisses de Bourgogne and you could probably shutdown the entire of London transport.
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Thursday 12th December 2019 04:28 GMT Olivier2553
According to Wikipedia, the banishment of Epoisse would be an urban legend. I have never heard of such banishment myself, but I should add that until the cheese had been unpacked, it has not a to pungent smell. In fact there are for more smelling cheeses in France.
The source your are citing seems to be very biases, describing cheese like an atrocity one should keep away from, it is no wonder as it seems to come from a country that believe nothing should have any smell at all and chicken should be bleached. But at the same time they promote atrocities like Axe or Lynx!
If you have the opportunity and fancy tasty cheese, try Epoisse and durian (well, this is not a cheese) and fried insects (those are not cheese either) but stay away from junk food.
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Thursday 12th December 2019 00:03 GMT Jemma
Oh God
The London underground in summer...
You need a gas mask if you're under 5ft 10“ or preferably a noddy suit.
I felt so sorry for the teenage girls rammed nose to armpit with some grunting beachmaster who you could smell from 200 yards downwind. Komodo Dragons would have turned tail at the smell.
Worst I imagine was for the girl of maybe 8-10 who'd get a heady mix of pit et le crotch with a side order of sycronised farting - I saw more than one turn green/pale.
I swear sometimes when the doors opened you could see armpit fumes rising like heat shimmer over the Sonoran..
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Thursday 12th December 2019 01:39 GMT Anonymous Coward
Re: Oh God
That's what people smell like. Our forebears somehow lived with those smells, and much worse, for hundreds of years before deodorant came on the scene. Pretending that stale sweat is a danger to health is purely a marketing ploy on the part of Big Fragrance.
If you can't get over it, then take whatever protective measures you feel you need - but don't blame people for being people.
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Thursday 12th December 2019 07:03 GMT W.S.Gosset
Re: Oh God
Yeah but what they DIDN'T do was squeeze into tiny metal tubes together. Not even in winter. "Back then" their idea of a crowd was a family unit meeting another family unit while wandering around open forest or savannah.
Homo sapiens evolved historically for homo sapiens' circs -- homo sardinesiens is being evolved for NOW as various people's noses kill them on public transport.
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Wednesday 11th December 2019 20:40 GMT Anonymous Coward
Lynx is okay, the problem is teenagers...
If you use it properly and in the intended quantities, Lynx- and presumably, Axe- is a decent enough deodorant (if somewhat overpriced), and the fragrances perfectly acceptable.
Its poor reputation stems from the fact that it's marketed at teenage boys, who tend to use half a can of deodorant in lieu of washing properly. I still remember in early secondary school in the late 1980s- around the time Lynx first became popular- being in the changing room and being able to *taste* the stuff in the air.
Years ago, Lynx ran a "spray more, get more" campaign and my first thought was "that's the *last* bloody thing you need to be saying to 13-year-old boys!" But then, "wash and use a couple of sprays instead of marinating yourself in the stuff in lieu of a shower you fucking minks" doesn't have them using two cans of the stuff a week, does it?
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Thursday 12th December 2019 07:12 GMT W.S.Gosset
Re: Lynx is okay, the problem is teenagers...
A London girlfriend was a teacher, who said a common feature of young lads' Lynx usage at her schools, was spraying the bloody stuff OVER their clothes!
As in, wearing shirt + jumper, grab can, lift arm, spray onto armpit. Or rather, onto layers of clothes covering armpit. Until concealed by the clouds. The noxious, choking clouds...
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Thursday 12th December 2019 20:06 GMT Intractable Potsherd
Re: Lynx is okay, the problem is teenagers...
Oy - that's tradition! Back in the 70s, when I was at school, it was a scene so common no-one mentioned it. When I saw it done as part of a scene in "Gregory's Girl" my then girlfriend couldn't understand why I was a breathless wreck on the floor! Obviously a) girls didn't do it, or b) she went to a school with a different demographic to mine :-)
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Thursday 12th December 2019 09:28 GMT Aristotles slow and dimwitted horse
Almost unrelatedly...
I almost chopped my finger off at the weekend while cutting firewood, and somewhat interestingly, as I was stood there looking down at all of the blood pumping out of my hand, rather than thinking that it would probably be best to get some sort of bandage, the actual first thing that went through my mind was "Careful with that Axe, Eugene..."
All hail the Floyd.
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Thursday 12th December 2019 13:27 GMT Chris King
Forty years ago, it would have been Hai Karate.
Yes, mine's the one with the self-defence manual in the right pocket.
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Thursday 12th December 2019 13:55 GMT Tony Jarvie
Not the only way to be a hazard on a school bus.
Back when I was getting a school bus on a daily basis the school had to ban aerosol deodorants due not to over-spray like this story, but the fact that some of the kids thought it would be "cool" to take the aerosol can and mate it with their smoker-pal's lighter and make a flamethrower. I really do wonder how we managed to travel day-in, day-out without some-one dying on those busses over the years...
Biting the hand that feeds IT
